


and they were roommates

by februyuri



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, F/F, Friends to Lovers, I don’t know how to write a modern AU of a world like LOK wish me luck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-01
Updated: 2020-06-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 05:27:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 70,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22071754
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/februyuri/pseuds/februyuri
Summary: In her teens, Kuvira lived for a few years at the Beifong household in Zaofu and torched just about every relationship therein except for her and Opal. Now, Opal’s moving out of the house for the first time, so of course Kuvira’s going to let her room with her in Republic City. Except, she might be biting off more than she can chew when Opal starts asking for Kuvira’s help regarding matters that aren’t exactly family-friendly.
Relationships: Kuvira/Opal (Avatar)
Comments: 108
Kudos: 596





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> General content warnings: food, smoking, alcohol/ism, and (too much) sex.
> 
> Also, Kuvira was in unhealthy relationships in the past (one with a man despite identifying as a lesbian at the time, and one with a woman much older than her when she was eighteen who pressured her into sex she wasn’t comfortable with) so this will be discussed as Kuvira is dealing with some trauma from that.
> 
> She also had a massive crush on Suyin when she was being fostered by her and while those feelings were not reciprocated it might make some uncomfortable. There is also referenced underage sex (no details).
> 
> If you have questions, feel free to send an ask to [my tumblr](kuvopal.tumblr.com) or drop a comment here :)

<3

“Thanks for helping me move in!” Opal’s voice rang out high and clear through the cool air of Kuvira’s apartment.

“Yeah, no problem!” her new friend replied, ever the helpful would-be boyfriend.

Kuvira hung back, one arm propping up a box against her hip. It hadn’t taken Opal long to find a place in Republic City, running into a burly boy on campus who she’d since recruited to help her move.

“Anytime. I mean, not that I think you’ll be moving again soon—” the boy blustered.

Kuvira silently decided that if there was any chance that he’d become a regular feature at her place, Opal would be moving sooner than expected. Opal seemed to catch Kuvira’s expression but had the nerve to grin. This was the first guy Kuvira had let into her apartment and he was proving to be an irritating ambassador for his gender.

She set the box she’d brought upstairs on the floor by her writing desk, and then extended her arms to accept the box in Opal’s new friend’s hands. The boy seemed a little confused, but he handed it over. Opal beamed and Kuvira cleared her throat.

“There’s one more box downstairs,” she said. He blinked.

“Seriously, Bolin, thanks for helping!” Opal said. With that statement he seemed to clue in to what Kuvira was suggesting. He grinned and made a clicking sound with his teeth, shooting Opal finger guns as he bumped into the doorway in his haste to get out and assist her. Opal giggled and Kuvira cringed.

With the boy headed downstairs Opal turned to Kuvira, an apologetic smile on her lips. “Sorry for making a mess of your apartment,” she said, gesturing around at the boxes littering the entrance. Kuvira snorted, dismissing Opal’s worries.

“Knowing you, it won’t be a mess for long,” she said. From what she could remember, Opal didn’t like to make things harder on others.

“Knowing _you_ , that’s a guarantee,” Opal replied, winking. Kuvira was a little charmed, as annoyed as she was with everything else. They both liked to be neat, even while Kuvira’s had a minimalist way of living to Opal’s, no less organized, artistically cluttered way.

“I’ve got! The last box!” the boy wheezed, coming up the stairs two at a time. Kuvira gritted her teeth as he stumbled inside. Surely it wasn’t that heavy. She pulled away from Opal to meet the boy at the door, accepting the box from his arms with a stifled grunt. She set it down on the kitchen table in time to see Opal and her new boyfriend share a small smile.

“I’ll see you in class on Wednesday,” Opal said.

“Yeah,” he said, grinning. Then he turned to Kuvira with wide eyes and smile. “Nice to meet you, Kuvira.” She forced a smile.

“You as well,” she said. She couldn’t remember his name. “Thank you for helping Opal move in.” He bobbed his head agreeably and through some miracle decided to take his leave.

“I’ll see you later,” he said, waving to Opal. He passed through the door.

“Do you want a ride home?” Opal asked. Opal didn’t know how to drive. Kuvira shot her another pointed look which Opal deliberately ignored.

“Nah,” the boy said. “I live kinda out of the way; I’ll just catch the bus.” Opal fretted.

“Would you at least like me to walk you to the bus-stop?” she asked. “It’s the least I could do to thank you.”

“You’ve already thanked me enough,” the boy insisted. He grinned. “Besides, you’ve got a lot of unpacking to do. I’ll see you in class.”

“Okay,” Opal said, smiling. “Good night, Bolin.”

“Good night,” he said, finally leaving. Kuvira strode forward, closing the door with a decisive click. Opal pursed her lips in a sort-of amused smile at her. Kuvira frowned, feeling a little defensive, but settled on ignoring Opal’s gaze.

“You’re adjusting to city life faster than I did,” she murmured, sinking back into the rhythm of her home, moving a box out of the way of the entrance. “Already you’ve got a boy toy.”

“And a cool new roomie!” Opal replied cheerfully, ignoring Kuvira’s snark and nudging her with her shoulder. Kuvira couldn’t help but smile back.

“We’ll see if you still feel like that after a week or so,” she muttered, squinting at her apartment.

“Kuvira, we’ve lived together before,” Opal said, rejecting all negativity. “We know what we’re getting into.”

“You’re right,” Kuvira said, aghast. She put her hands on Opal’s shoulders, pushing her towards the door. “I changed my mind; you’re moving back in with Su—”

“Hey!” Opal giggled, pushing her way back into the apartment. Kuvira let her pass with a little chuckle. Opal tucked a chunk of hair behind her ear before bending down to pick a box blocking the entrance off of the floor, placing it on the kitchen counter.

“Mom would love that, though,” Opal said. “She’s been texting me all day.” Her sigh came out in a dissatisfied huff, grabbing a utility knife off the counter and slicing through the tape. Kuvira frowned.

“She’s still not comfortable with you moving out?” she asked. She’d thought Suyin had trusted her at least _that_ much.

“Well, you know how she is,” Opal said, opening up the box in her hands, sifting around. “She’s still not totally over _you_ moving out and she’s had _years_ to process.” So, it was like that.

Kuvira snorted. “That’s down to Su being a control freak more than actually worrying about me,” she murmured.

“Point being?” Opal asked smoothly. Kuvira couldn’t stop her smile, bitterness ebbing way with surprising ease. Opal kind of had that affect on people.

“And you know that’s not true,” Opal had to insist, digging deeper in the box she’d so immaculately packed earlier. “Mom does love you. You’re family.”

“Yeah, my sleeping with her son really screamed wholesome family values, didn’t it?” Kuvira muttered, unwilling to let Opal cajole her into pretending things hadn’t been fucked up. Her years in the Beifong household had gotten ugly, and she and Baatar still hadn’t spoken to each other. Suyin and Kuvira hadn’t spoken either, for that matter.

“You’re a lesbian,” Opal said, almost dismissively, pulling out a sweater. “Mom doesn’t blame you for what happened.” Something about that still hurt.

“Whatever,” Kuvira said, growing weary all of the sudden. She’d figured out she wasn’t strictly a lesbian but that didn’t change anything about this situation. “I’m not family, Opal, as much as I would’ve loved to feel like that when I was young. Now I’m glad I never was, can’t we just leave it at that?”

“I’m sorry,” Opal said, voice unexpectedly high-pitched. Kuvira glanced at Opal, surprised at the change in tone. Opal’s hands tightened around the sweater in her grasp. “I’m only like half an hour in the door and I’m already dredging up bad memories.”

“No Opal,” Kuvira sighed, dismayed, massaging her brow. “It’s … we should be able to talk about this stuff. But your mother and I … it’s complicated.”

“I know,” Opal said, voice no less small.

“You were the only healthy relationship I had living in that house,” Kuvira said in the tone of a confession, though it was nothing that Opal couldn’t have inferred. Her relationship to Opal had been the only thing to escape Kuvira’s teenage years unscathed. “You and Huan. That’s about it. And having a relationship with him is more him tolerating you than anything else.” Opal didn’t seem satisfied with Kuvira’s evasion.

“I want you to know that if I wasn’t moving in with you, mom would’ve insisted I attend school in Zaofu,” she said, catching Kuvira’s gaze. “For whatever that’s worth.” Kuvira hadn’t expected Opal to say anything like that, and Opal’s words struck her. Her throat felt swollen when she tried to speak. So, she stopped trying.

Opal, to her credit, seemed to sense that Kuvira wasn’t upset with her. She pulled on her sweater and sat the box back onto the floor, as though nothing had happened. Opal was very outspoken, but she didn’t take things personally very often. It was almost a relief to be able to argue with someone and not feel like complete shit afterwards. Not that this had been an argument. Kuvira was tired.

“Are you hungry?” she asked. Opal heaved a sigh, shifting her weight onto one leg as she considered.

“It’s been kind of a long day,” she murmured. “I might want to go straight to bed after dinner.” It wasn’t even six yet, but the sun had already started to set and Kuvira could tell that all the moving had taxed Opal.

“How does rice sound?” Kuvira asked. She hadn’t kept up with a vegetarian diet after leaving Zaofu, but she was sure she had some vegetables around to make a proper meal for Opal. Some kind of stir-fry, maybe.

“Rice sounds really good,” Opal said, smiling blearily, rubbing her eyes.

“I’ll show you where you’ll be sleeping. You can get settled in and I’ll make dinner,” Kuvira said. Opal nodded and followed Kuvira as Kuvira led Opal out of the kitchen to the living room. Kuvira turned on the heat as they passed by the knob.

“It’s probably not the most comfortable but it’ll work for now,” Kuvira said, gesturing at the couch. “If you want, we can probably move your bed from home, there’s enough space in here for a twin.” She knew Opal was used to more comfortable bedding, and while they’d planned for Opal sleeping on the couch Kuvira was still a little concerned about how Opal would adjust. “You could get that boy to help.”

“Bolin,” Opal reminded Kuvira as though she was annoyed, but Kuvira could hear the smile in her voice. “And yeah,” she murmured, sinking into the couch with a hushed groan. “I’m more used to beds so that’d be nice. But—” she yawned. “This is good, too.” Kuvira smiled. Opal was already half asleep. Kuvira turned around to head back to the kitchen.

“Kuvira?” Opal asked quietly. Kuvira paused.

“Yes, Opal?” she replied, equally as quiet. She heard Opal shift and then felt Opal’s arms around her waist.

“Thanks,” Opal insisted into Kuvira’s shoulder blades as she hugged her. Kuvira smiled, shaking her head.

“Go to sleep,” she said. Opal poked Kuvira’s ribs and giggled to herself, turning around and falling face-first on the couch with a satisfied smile. Kuvira headed back to the kitchen, feeling warm.

After Kuvira had left, they’d stayed in touch and Opal had visited Kuvira when she could, but those times were rare. While Kuvira had been on board with Opal moving in from the start, seeing her again had made Kuvira happier than she’d expected. She woke up Opal at seven and they shared a pretty decent stir-fry.

<3

Opal had gone to school for two years in Zaofu before transferring her credits to Republic City. She said she hadn’t had decided on a major, just landed in a vague Bachelor of Arts program. Judging by the stacks of books Opal had bought at the bookstore Kuvira inferred she was taking a lot of writing courses, with a sole Zoology course, and was probably heading towards a literature minor at the very least.

Kuvira had to admit, she was surprised that Opal had left Zaofu. This was largely due to the fact that Kuvira had never expected Opal to stay when she had. Opal didn’t do things she didn’t want to do, and Kuvira couldn’t understand what could’ve happened in a year that would’ve made her change her mind. Perhaps this was just inevitability, even at a young age Opal was full of quiet potential and wanderlust, bowing her head with some grace living beneath Suyin but with eyes that always skimmed the horizon.

Kuvira had felt like she’d never leave the Beifongs given the option, having found the closest thing resembling a home in their halls. It was the aching realization that Zaofu _wasn’t_ home that pushed her out. Opal, on the other hand, had never wanted for a place to stay and with a mind always lost in books was fonder of adventure. Kuvira had grown tired of adventure early on. Yet Opal had stayed while Kuvira ran.

Now, Opal was here, for better or for worse. Though Kuvira wasn’t comfortable admitting it, it was turning out for the better. Opal had been pretty spoiled living in Zaofu, learning home skills such as cooking out of curiosity, not necessity. But Opal certainly had some general knowledge, though Kuvira had had to teach her how to use the laundry machine. She was a fantastic cook and often made the pair of them breakfast, a meal Kuvira had become accustomed to skipping most days.

More than that, however, was Opal’s general presence. It’d been years since they’d lived together and while Kuvira had always loved her friend she’d really forgotten how good Opal could make her feel. Opal was easygoing, told bad puns, and held a general attitude of ‘do no harm but take no shit’ that Kuvira always respected. And Opal cared about Kuvira. Maybe it was just the benefits of living with someone, someone who didn’t make her miserable at that, but Kuvira felt cared for. Weird vegan breakfasts and all.

Opal was going to come home any minute now from her lab and Kuvira was making the pair of them dinner. Noodle soup in vegetable stock with an egg, one of the few animal products Opal would eat since they knew the couple that took care of the chickens and it passed Opal’s moral code. It was fortunate because Kuvira did not want to keep track of all the nuts for protein requirements and wasn’t as skilled at cooking lentils as Opal was.

Kuvira knew Opal would want to get home, have dinner, and get right back to studying. Opal was a much more attentive student than Kuvira had been when she’d taken university classes, though that was more due to life drama than anything else. Opal had told Kuvira her first year at the university in Zaofu had been less than stellar but Kuvira could tell she was making up for any transgressions.

Zaofu’s education was also rigorous but the class sizes were smaller. Despite coming from such a prosperous state, Kuvira knew Opal had never been in a classroom with hundreds of people and a completely indifferent professor. It was a small thing, but Opal would still need to adjust. But she knew that Opal could be surprisingly adaptable; she didn’t worry.

At that, Kuvira heard keys rattle in the door. “Hi honey, I’m home,” Opal trilled from the doorway. Kuvira smiled.

“Hey,” she said. “You’re right on time.”

Opal made noises of interest and awe as Kuvira set up dinner. Opal took her meal on the couch to rest her legs and in general sit on her ass. Kuvira could see she was tired. She hung back in the kitchen, finishing her supper before beginning to put everything away in the dishwasher.

“So,” she said, putting away the cutlery. “How was your first month in Republic City?”

“Better,” Opal replied, smiling. “I’m starting to get the hang of things.” Fortunate, since Kuvira knew midterms would start up within a few weeks. Opal looked tired and her cheeks were flushed, glasses propped up on her chest. But she seemed to be telling the truth.

“Just keep it up for a couple more months, then winter break,” Kuvira said comfortingly.

“Winter break,” Opal said wistfully, as though it were a hundred years away. “We should do something then. Like maybe we can go skiing or snowshoeing. What do people do in Republic City when it’s cold out?”

“Complain?” Kuvira suggested, closing the door to the dishwasher. Opal pouted. Kuvira knew she was going to be working all through the break. “You could ask your boyfriend,” she said. “He’s a local, right?”

Opal scoffed. “Bolin’s not my boyfriend,” she said. Kuvira felt a little relieved—she still kept the faith that Opal had better taste, but she also knew better than to expect things to remain that way.

“Tell _him_ that,” she said. He’d been hanging around Kuvira and Opal’s apartment with increasingly distasteful frequency. Fortunately, or more likely by design, Kuvira tended to be out when he was in—but she didn’t miss the signs of his presence. Just as often, Opal would go out for dinner with him, or head over to his house to study, despite them sharing only one class.

“No way, he doesn’t think of me like that,” Opal insisted. Kuvira grimaced, wandering over to the couch to sit next to Opal.

“Don’t speak too soon,” she said, just in case Opal genuinely had no interest in him. Opal moved the dishes out of the way so Kuvira could put her feet up on the coffee table. “I can tell when a guy is interested in a girl.”

“I guess you’d know, being a lesbian,” Opal asked, thinking she was being clever.

“My being a ‘lesbian’ is _why_ I know these things,” Kuvira said dryly. Opal made a face in response.

“I’m surprised you’re encouraging it then,” she said. “I thought you didn’t like Bolin.”

“I don’t,” Kuvira said, freed to find that Opal wasn’t planning on convincing Kuvira to change her mind. “You do.”

“I do,” Opal allowed. “But … I just started school. Right now, Bolin and I are just friends, and that’s fine.” Kuvira nodded. Opal had been pretty solitary in high school, preferring to hang out with her family and a few select friends, including Kuvira. It was good that Opal was making new connections in Republic City, even if it included Bolin.

“And what about you?” Opal asked. “You can nag me about _my_ non-existent love life, but what about yours?”

“That’s where you make a faulty assumption,” Kuvira said, yawning. “My love life _isn’t_ non-existent. I just keep it out of your hair.” Again, Opal pulled a face, though she seemed a little surprised at Kuvira’s revelation that she’d been dating. Kuvira really had no intention of concealing her relationships, but she’d kept them separate from her home life with Opal for the most part.

“Are you encouraging me to go somewhere with Bolin so that he stops coming around the apartment?” Opal asked, chewing on her lip, putting her empty plate on the table next to the couch and sitting up. “Because if you’re really that uncomfortable with him I can hang out with him at his place or the library.” Kuvira shook her head rapidly.

“It’s fine,” she said. “Just make sure he picks up after himself.” She was glad Opal was making friends, if that was his intention. But Kuvira would rather spend time on home turf then have Opal spend increasing time with just one boy.

Opal had other friends that she’d mentioned to Kuvira, but Bolin was a constant, and Kuvira didn’t want Opal to fall into the same situation that Kuvira had when she’d first moved to Republic City. Boyfriends were worth the annoyance if Opal knew she had a safe place and support to come home to.

Opal watched Kuvira quietly, head resting on her palm. “How was your day?” she asked after a moment, just long enough to make Kuvira uncomfortable with her gaze.

“It was fine,” she said. “Work is work.”

“I was talking with Mom the other day about school and I realized I didn’t know a lot about your job,” Opal said thoughtfully. Kuvira wondered if the implication was that Suyin had asked about her. Not something Kuvira needed to think about.

“You can come down sometime,” Kuvira said. She worked as a bartender at the Red Lotus in downtime Republic City.

“With Bolin?” Opal teased.

“Or whoever,” Kuvira said, giving Opal a light glare. “You have other friends. I hope.” Opal just smirked.

“How did you get the job there?” she asked. “I would’ve thought your work experience in Zaofu would’ve netted you something different. Bouncer, maybe.” Kuvira snickered. She’d had a job in security in Zaofu, and while Kuvira had used that experience to put a stop to some rowdy behaviour more than once she liked her nights slow.

“When I first started school here, I got a job at the campus pub,” she explained. “Transferred those skills when I left.” Opal seemed to catch on the fact that this was the first time Kuvira had talked about leaving, but thankfully decided not to press the issue further.

“Do you like your job?” Opal asked. Kuvira laughed.

“If people liked their jobs, they wouldn’t be jobs,” she said cynically. She _did_ like her job. She liked the people she worked with at least. It wasn’t her dream or anything, but then again, any notions of a dream had been put to rest years ago.

Opal was quiet, and Kuvira knew she was thinking about why Kuvira wasn’t still in school. Kuvira didn’t want her to say it out loud. She felt shitty enough over dropping out as it was; she didn’t need Opal’s pity _or_ Opal’s tough love.

“You know, you don’t have to hide your girlfriend from me, or anything,” Opal spoke up, thankfully shifting the conversation into a slightly safer area.

“There’s no one worth meeting yet,” Kuvira said dismissively. Kuvira hadn’t gotten serious about anyone in … in a long time. “It’s really not a big deal; I just had to defend my reputation.” Opal nodded, smiling a little.

“Good,” she said. “As long as you know you can tell me anything, about anyone. And I won’t judge.” Kuvira almost laughed. She’d hit rock bottom a few years ago, she could hardly surpass that, could she? Opal seemed to think Kuvira was laughing at her. “I mean, _maybe_ I’ll judge, but I won’t hold it against you. Probably.” Kuvira just smiled.

“Don’t worry, I’ll let you vet my future wife,” she promised. Opal beamed.

“That’s all I ask for,” she said. Kuvira had an urge then to tuck Opal’s hair behind her ear. It had come undone and was curling around her jaw. Kuvira kept her hands to herself. She cleared her throat, leaning over to grab Opal’s plate and take it to the sink.

“Do you still dance?” Opal asked. Her voice sounded small but strong.

Kuvira silently decided she’d answered enough questions for the day and pretended she hadn’t heard.


	2. Chapter 2

Kuvira got out of bed closer to dinner than lunchtime, bypassing the breakfast she’d been hoping to have. Blearily, she checked her phone. She’d missed her alarm a few hours back and the notification stared back at her, mocking. She groaned to herself and rubbed her eyes.

The late shifts she’d been taking recently were starting to take their toll on her. She missed whole days just recovering for her next shift and not seeing the sun wasn’t doing her any favours either, most likely. A chipper, nagging voice that sounded suspiciously like a blend of Suyin and Opal informed her that she needed to get out more, not just waste her days off.

She stripped out of her outfit from the night before, or rather this morning, she’d been too tired to change into pajamas. Blearily, she got naked and grabbed a bundle of clothes from her dresser, sneaking across the hall to her shower. Living with another person was weird, you had to have— _modesty_ , or something.

She showered quickly, getting used to being awake with cold water, thinking about what she’d do with the small amount of day she had left. Grocery shopping. When she’d come home, she’d checked the fridge for a quick dinner and hungrily finished off some spring rolls but that was it.

She remembered there were some veggies left, maybe enough to make a stir-fry out of, but that was it. She could at least do _something_ useful before she had to head out to work again. She put her hair up in a braid, not willing to subject herself to the process of drying it quite yet and headed out of the bathroom.

Opal was talking to somebody on the phone and Kuvira hung back, not wanting to eavesdrop. Opal was laughing with them, and the afternoon light caught her, looking very pretty and homey. She was wearing a loose yellow sweater that was way too big for her, and she had her feet up on her chair, wrapping the hand that wasn’t holding her phone around her knees. Kuvira couldn’t help but feel warm seeing her like that. So comfortable and cute.

In the years Kuvira hadn’t seen her, Opal _had_ changed. She’d gotten a little taller, gained some weight, and the choppiness of her hair at the edges spoke to someone who cut their own hair. She looked good, not quite like a full-fledged adult yet but Kuvira wasn’t even sure she looked like a grownup herself.

Still, quietly, Kuvira thought Opal had this sense of self-assurance about her now that she hadn’t had when she was younger. Not quite the dogmatism she’d exhibited from time to time but a calm confidence about herself and her world, coupled with an easy interest in other perspectives.

It was like watching a flower finally bloom. Kuvira had always saw … a potential in Opal that she hadn’t managed to ever see in herself. A potential she still couldn’t see. And it wasn’t like Kuvira was wrong, was she? Here was Opal, soft and smiling and giggling on the phone with someone she cared deeply for, with sunned skin and a healthy disposition. And here was Kuvira, growing pale and wasting away with her shitty job, even losing the muscle mass she’d once had with dance.

“I’ll talk to you later,” Opal was saying, moving away from the kitchen. “Love you. Bye-bye.” She looked over to Kuvira. “What’s up?” she asked.

“Oh,” Kuvira said, not expecting for Opal to notice her spying on her. “I was going to go grocery shopping.” Her voice was still thick with sleep. “Anything you want for dinner?”

“Rice noodles please! I’m going to make a stir-fry. And we need more tofu.”

“Sure,” Kuvira said, surprised that Opal was going to make dinner, but pleased. They had some greens left that’d serve stir-fry well. Opal just seemed to intuitively know what … what the household needed. She fit in so well Kuvira couldn’t even say it was like she was living on her own. It was better. “I’ll uh … I’ll see you later.”

“I’ll come with you!” Opal replied agreeably. And that was that. Kuvira walked over to the grocery store, just a block away from their— _her_ apartment, finding the essentials, still feeling half-asleep and weird.

The silence was comfortable on the cool fall night. Opal had her hands tucked in her pants pockets, sweater hanging clumsy but cute over her frame. Kuvira had managed enough sense to grab a jacket but she still felt cold, even though Opal looked just fine with the weather, almost bouncing with energy. Kuvira didn’t know how Opal was so alive even when going to school full-time.

“So how is your essay going?” Kuvira asked into the silence between them.

“It’s going,” Opal considered. She added, “I’ll get you to proofread it when I’m done with the first draft.” Kuvira let out a sigh of air. She hadn’t expected to be volunteered, but she’d do it, obviously.

“I didn’t exactly rock my literature class,” Kuvira warned her. It had been her first and only one.

“Really?” Opal asked, wrinkling her nose in confusion. Well … it wasn’t like Kuvira had _bombed_ her class or anything. Kuvira could bullshit most things, a good trait to have in that subject, but a combination of her lack of focus and attendance had knocked down her final grade by the end of the semester.

“I got a B,” Kuvira shrugged.

“That’s still good,” Opal argued.

“I _speak_ the language,” Kuvira frowned. “If I did worse than _that_ I’d have to exile myself.” Opal cracked a smile at that.

“You should start taking classes again,” she said, voice light, as though she hadn’t pinpointed one of Kuvira’s greatest insecurities.

“Is that your opinion or your mother’s?” Kuvira asked between gritted teeth, gearing for a fight. She’d guessed that that was who Opal had been speaking to on the phone.

“Both, probably?” Opal said, refusing to engage. “It’s probably yours, too.” Kuvira sighed through her nose.

“I’m not ready yet,” she said. Opal nodded. “I don’t even know what I’d go to school for,” she added, still feeling defensive. “Plus, I don’t have mommy dearest to pay for it.” Opal frowned at that.

“Don’t be too sure about that,” was all she said. Kuvira shook her head. She’d never in a thousand years let Suyin pay for her schooling. Even Opal staying with Kuvira was a connection to Suyin that sometimes almost felt too much to bear.

“I’m not ready,” Kuvira repeated. And she probably never would be. “Maybe in a couple of years when I actually know what I want to do.” Opal nodded. They were different. Opal was going to school without a clear idea why, as far as Kuvira knew. She wasn’t pressing Opal for details.

“Okay,” Opal said softly. She picked up her favourite brand of rice noodles off the shelf, and they headed over to the checkout.

In front of the cashier, Opal said, “So, you were right about Bolin.” Kuvira rolled her eyes.

“And?” Kuvira asked. “Do you need me to scare him off?”

“Oh,” Opal said. “We’re just going to the movies.” That surprised Kuvira.

“So …” she realized. “You like him.”

“I mean, maybe?” Opal asked. “You can’t deny that he’s pretty cute. And nice.” Kuvira could deny all of it.

“Whatever,” Kuvira snorted, reaching out to pay for their food.

“I know you disapprove of him,” Opal said. “I mean, I’m not just going to capitulate to whatever _you_ want but I do want you to be aware that it’s happening.” Kuvira shrugged.

“I’m not your …” she cut herself off. Not Opal’s what? Her mom, her dad? “Your older sister.” She didn’t get to call those shots.

“Don’t have any of those,” Opal said, smiling a little curiously. Kuvira shrugged again.

“I just mean …” she stumbled. “I mean. Am I?” She’d never gotten her name changed to Beifong but she’d almost kind of sort of been part of their family for awhile. As much as a puzzle piece from a different set could fit into a new one. Kuvira swallowed. Opal grabbed the reusable bag the cashier had stocked up with their food, carrying it out of the store.

“Kuvira,” she started when they were outside. “Is it rude of me to say that I never thought of you as my sister?”

Kuvira didn’t know what to say. She and Opal hadn’t been extremely close when she lived at the Beifong household but, they’d been close enough. Closer than anyone else given that the twins were too young and loud, Huan was too quiet and Baatar was well … much less Baatar Sr, and much less Suyin.

“I mean,” Opal said, pressing in on Kuvira’s silence. “I mean I saw you as a friend.” Kuvira glanced over at her. Opal was earnest, watching Kuvira with wide eyes, as though she was afraid she’d said something wrong.

“Even if we were … even if you were older than me and had more stuff going on in your life than I did. Like, you’re part of my family Kuvira, and I don’t want to … I don’t want to go through my life without you. But, that doesn’t mean you have to be a Beifong.” Opal frowned. “This is coming out all wrong,” she said.

“No, no,” Kuvira argued, shifting closer. “I … I understand what you mean I …” She’d never had someone like this. Someone that she felt she could … spend the rest of her life with. Never anybody permanent. “I just … I don’t even know … what it’s like to have a family,” she said, and she laughed but she knew it came out sounding fucked up because Opal flinched.

“Oh Kuvira,” Opal sighed, opening her arms and, after a second’s hesitation to check Kuvira’s response, wrapping Kuvira up in a tight hug. Kuvira’s throat felt tight.

“Get off,” she said. “I’m fine.” Opal’s grip slackened but she didn’t fully let go. Kuvira pressed a hand onto Opal’s wrist to hold her there. She didn’t want her to let go. She liked having her here.

“What’s the difference between a sister and a friend anyway?” Kuvira asked after awhile.

“I’m not sure,” Opal said honestly. “But the difference between a brother and a friend is that you can walk away. You can’t always walk away from family. But you can walk away from me.”

Kuvira’s throat clenched, feeling a sharp flash of insecurity run through her body.

“I’m not sure I want that,” she admitted. Opal laughed.

“Well I should _hope_ not,” she said. “That’s the point. With friends, you build something together that’ll last. You’re not born into it. You don’t have to feel obligated to it.”

“Do you feel obligated to your family?” Kuvira asked. Opal’s eyes were bright. Clearly this wasn’t something she talked about a lot.

“Sometimes,” she said softly. Kuvira nodded. Opal had barely managed to move out here. Suyin had wanted her, and the rest of her family, to stay in Zaofu. Even while Opal was lucky to have all the support she had from her family, Kuvira knew it made Opal feel indebted to them.

“Still,” Kuvira said. “I don’t know if it’s even possible for me to feel like anyone’s family. I mean, I slept with your brother.” And had fallen in love with Opal’s mother. Opal didn’t engage with the last part.

“Another thing about family is, is while you can’t walk away from them, they can’t walk away from you,” she offered. “I’m not going to walk away from you. Family or not. That’s what I wanted to say.” Kuvira felt flushed.

“I, there’s no need for that Opal,” she said. “I’m also not sure if I believe you. If I fuck up really badly …” Kuvira’s voice faded out. Opal just wouldn’t be Opal if she stayed.

“Maybe I just don’t think you’ll fuck up,” Opal said simply. “The person you’ve hurt the most in your life has been yourself.” Ouch, that kind of hurt to hear, laid out like that. “So, you can consider me a uh—permanent fixture for as long as you want. I mean, I’ll move out eventually but. Again, that’s the difference between family and most friends. You can always call me, whenever, and I’ll be there.”

That was a nice sentiment as far as family went. “Alright,” Kuvira said. She was sure Opal knew she felt the same. “But you don’t feel like my sister.”

“No, I don’t,” Opal said. Kuvira pouted.

“Seems contradictory,” she said.

“I don’t know, it’s just different between you and me,” Opal said, and she didn’t elaborate. She probably couldn’t. “I’m just letting you know that I’m in this. When we’re old ladies, I’ll be here.”

“That sounds more like a proposal,” Kuvira said, rolling her eyes.

“That’s a type of family,” Opal shrugged. “And that’s probably more in line with what I feel for you.” Kuvira almost laughed out loud, fucking straight girls.

But Opal misinterpreted what Kuvira was laughing at because she reached out to hold Kuvira’s shoulder. “And you don’t have to feel the way that I do,” she said earnestly. “I know my family makes you … uncomfortable and … I feel like you’re always going to hold me at a distance because you don’t want to get wrapped up in them again.”

Had Opal noticed? Of course she had. But she wasn’t even resenting Kuvira for that. “So yeah,” Opal concluded. “You’re not my sister. But I’m still not going anywhere.” Kuvira swallowed and she could hear it click in her throat. She turned away from Opal, looking over at the stove with wide eyes, willing herself not to cry.

She ground out a quick, “Thanks.” She cleared her throat. “Anyway, you can date Bolin. Whatever, I don’t care.” That was kind of a lie, but that was the thing about having a friend. You had to try to not push them away. Opal smiled at Kuvira like she understood, and she picked up their pace, heading back to their home.


	3. Chapter 3

“Kuvira,” a soft voice hummed. “You still with me?”

Kuvira blinked, looking at the woman seated across from her on the couch, at the fond but teasing grin. Ginger had brought in some dinner and a bottle of wine for the two of them to share, from a restaurant Kuvira could never afford, and here Kuvira was fretting about Opal.

Opal had basically told Kuvira not to wait up, so Kuvira was feeling a little grouchy and distracted but that wasn’t Ginger’s fault. They weren’t girlfriends but Kuvira owed her at least to be present. “Sorry Ginger,” Kuvira said, feeling guilty, setting down her wine glass. “Roommate drama.”

Kuvira couldn’t help but feel protective of Opal, as she always had, so it was hard to focus on her date. Opal might not come back tonight, possibly staying over at Bolin’s, and Kuvira just knew she was going to be worrying until she saw her again because she hadn’t told Opal to text her. She’d figured that was inappropriate, maybe a little rude, but she was regretting it now.

“That’s a shame,” Ginger said, tone genuine but she didn’t pry. She smiled then, deep and red, and shifted nearer to Kuvira on the couch. “The only drama I like is on the stage.” She added, with a tone that feigned innocence, “Maybe I can take your mind off of it?”

Kuvira smiled, propping her elbow up on the couch to get closer to her date, tucking Ginger’s red hair behind her ear with her free hand. Ginger was way out of her league, gorgeous and patient. She really didn’t deserve her. “Why, Ginger, are you seducing me?” she asked.

“I suppose that depends on if I’m successful,” Ginger replied. Ginger dragged her tongue across her scarlet lips, then leaned in and teasingly licked Kuvira’s lips. And Kuvira met her halfway, all too eager to set her problems aside and focus on the woman she was with.

Kissing Ginger was always amazing. The taste of her matt lipstick, and her mouth minty clean with a sweet flavour of wine, always just a bit professional about everything. But when she was kissing, Ginger let loose, writhing and grinding, and the noises she made … Kuvira reached around to hold Ginger’s back as she guided her to lie down on the couch.

They needed a bigger couch. Opal had been able to fit on here just fine when she didn’t have a bed, but it wasn’t big enough for two people. Impatiently, Kuvira tossed aside some cushions and pinned Ginger down, kissing her fiercely and then reaching down to help Ginger take off her top. Ginger was wearing a pretty bra, dark red, and Kuvira reached behind her back, trying the clasps unsuccessfully for a moment. There was a trick to it that a sports bra girl like Kuvira had never quite learned.

Ginger just grinned and pushed Kuvira’s hands down to her thighs. She hiked up her skirt, an unsubtle hint which Kuvira eagerly picked up on. She reached underneath the skirt, finding the edges of Ginger’s frilly underwear, pausing just a moment to look up at Ginger and make sure she was still on board.

In response, Ginger lifted her legs up in the air, smiling at Kuvira as Kuvira dragged her underwear down over her legs. Kuvira noticed distantly her panties matched her bra, because of course they did. Ginger gave her hips a little twist to break Kuvira out of her reverie, and it worked. Kuvira tossed the underwear over her shoulder and leaned back down, slotting her thigh between Ginger’s.

She went back to kissing her, and she could feel Ginger, already wet and swollen against her. “You want this?” Kuvira asked into Ginger’s neck. She could feel Ginger take in a shaky breath and, after a moment, nod eagerly when she recognized that Kuvira had asked her a question.

“Tell me how much,” Kuvira suggested, having the urge to tease her, but she gripped Ginger’s thigh.

“Kuvira, please,” Ginger moaned. Kuvira shifted her body to make room for her hand, moving between Ginger’s legs. Ginger let out another moan, her entire body seeming to contort to accommodate and reach towards Kuvira, breasts thrust forward.

Kuvira undid Ginger’s bra again, without as much trouble this time. Ginger had probably intended on taking it off herself but Kuvira had distracted her, and Kuvira was going to take some pride in that. Ginger’s nipples hardened in the cool air of the apartment and Kuvira gripped one breast, running her thumb beneath the nipple.

On impulse she leaned down, taking Ginger’s other breast into her mouth, running her tongue across the nipple. She pressed Ginger to lean back on the couch as she sucked gently on one breast, a promise for what was to come. She glanced up at Ginger whose cheeks were flushed, eyes hooded in pleasure as she watched Kuvira. But she didn’t seem particularly interested in the specifics of what Kuvira had been doing.

Kuvira moved her mouth off of Ginger. “Wait, do you even feel this?” she asked, other hand still awkwardly perched on Ginger’s other breast. She realized she hadn’t really asked the previous times they’d had sex, hadn’t really had the opportunity, and she knew some women lost sensitivity after surgery.

“No,” Ginger said honestly, reaching down to cup Kuvira’s jaw. “But you looked so good I didn’t have the heart to tell you.” Kuvira ducked her head, feeling a little foolish but also a little flattered at Ginger’s compliment. She returned to Ginger’s chest, pressing a kiss on her sternum.

“You feel this?” she asked, getting right back on track.

Ginger laughed. “They didn’t surgically replace my whole chest, you know,” she said, a little breathlessly, shifting against Kuvira.

Kuvira moved beneath her breasts, pressing a kiss just beneath them. “Feel this?” she asked, sinking off the couch to kneel on the ground. Ginger let out a little sound of satisfaction.

“A little,” she said. Another kiss, this time to Ginger’s belly.

“This?” she asked.

_“Kuvira,”_ Ginger sighed, spreading her legs even wider, welcoming Kuvira between them. Kuvira mouthed her way down between Ginger’s thighs, pressing a kiss on her hipbone, before kissing the space just above Ginger’s clit. Then she ducked down, and dragged the flat of her tongue across Ginger bottom to top, taking care to focus on the tip. Ginger let out a little choked gasp, and then sighed, relaxing into the touch.

Carefully, Kuvira took Ginger into her mouth, sucking on her gently and Ginger let out one long, desperate groan. “Kuvira,” she said. “Kuvira could you—” she cut herself off and Kuvira looked up, up past her heaving breasts to her flushed face. Kuvira had been touching herself a little, and she dug her fingers against herself even harder out of reflex, letting out a little desperate grunt around Ginger’s clit.

“Spirits, Kuvira,” Ginger moaned, thighs bowing in reflexively. “Could you finger me? Please?” she asked. Ginger was always so put together, but she knew that Kuvira liked to be asked what to do and wasn’t above begging when Kuvira pretended to be obtuse.

“Here?” Kuvira asked, grinning, moving her mouth from Ginger’s clit just long enough to ask as she moved her free hand up to the place she knew Ginger wanted her. Ginger looked a little annoyed then, because she knew Kuvira already knew, and just wanted Ginger to say it.

“You’re so cocky,” she whined. Kuvira grinned up at her.

“Good thing I have the skills to back it up,” she replied, reaching up towards Ginger’s mouth. “Could you get them nice and wet for me, babe?” she asked. Ginger leaned in eagerly, drawing Kuvira’s fingers to the back of her mouth, her lipstick forming a ring around Kuvira’s fingers in a way Kuvira knew she’d be thinking about for months to come. And then Ginger let out some cute little performative moans, like she was getting off just from sucking on Kuvira’s fingers.

She ran her hand across Ginger’s clit, still wet from Kuvira’s mouth, and Ginger almost drooled around Kuvira. When Kuvira felt like they were slick enough, she took her fingers from Ginger and carefully slipped one inside of her, sliding back and forth over and over until she was comfortable inside her. Next time she’d have to have proper lube, because at this rate Kuvira was _sure_ there’d be a next time, but this was working for now.

“How does this feel?” Kuvira asked, voice tense and low. She flexed her finger inside Ginger experimentally and Ginger moaned, hips jerking instinctively.

“Touch me,” she begged. And Kuvira did. She took Ginger into her mouth again, this time fingering her, and Ginger threw her head back. “Oh, fuck, yes, yes, yes,” Ginger moaned in her sweet, high-pitched voice. Kuvira grinned into Ginger; hearing her voice, always so prim and proper on TV, come undone in Kuvira’s living room never got old.

This, _this_ she loved. Doing this to a woman, especially to someone as gorgeous as Ginger. Kuvira’s entire fucking body felt like it was throbbing with heat and desire, and she couldn’t help but reach down between her legs with her free hand and start grinding on her palm again. She took a quick breath and couldn’t help but moan. Nothing beat this, _nothing._

Ginger’s hands reached down, carding themselves through Kuvira’s hair, her long nails sending tingles down Kuvira’s spine. And Kuvira buried herself ever deeper between Ginger’s legs, kissing and sucking and thrusting in her until Ginger’s hands were tense and her thighs were trembling. She was close, Kuvira knew. And if it wasn’t just her body cues, her words were making this obvious.

“Kuvira, oh—” Ginger moaned breathily, her head falling back, hair pillowing behind her. “Fuck, I—ah, ah—ah—” she was incoherent and sweet under Kuvira’s mouth. Kuvira wasn’t going to come, at least not now, but she felt so good, grinding herself down on her fist, she felt like she was on fire. She couldn’t help but moan against Ginger and then, Ginger was coming.

Ginger let out a shuddering gasp and Kuvira moved her hand to clutch at Ginger’s thighs. Kuvira coaxed Ginger through her orgasm, licking and teasing; this was the best part. Ginger’s hands in her hair, tight and shaking, breasts heaving and legs falling open.

Kuvira carefully withdrew her fingers, and Ginger was still too out of it to even notice though Kuvira thought the little whimper Ginger let out might’ve been related. Kuvira pressed another kiss to Ginger and propped her elbows up on Ginger’s knees, peering up at her with some expectations.

Ginger still looked totally out of it, and unbelievably sexy, her skirt pooling around her hips and her breasts heaving with every breath. Ginger tugged her fingers through Kuvira’s hair idly as Kuvira cleaned up their mess with one of the napkins on the table.

“That was—that was amazing, Kuvira,” Ginger admitted breathlessly. Kuvira grinned a little goofily, wiping her mouth. There was a reason why Ginger kept coming back to Kuvira’s shitty apartment even when she risked getting caught by the paparazzi each time, and Kuvira wasn’t going to say it was just her skills in bed but that had to be at least twenty percent of the reason.

Then, Ginger went on, glancing over Kuvira’s shoulder, “But, who’s that?” Kuvira turned around to see Opal at the door. Kuvira hadn’t even heard the key turn.

Kuvira jumped to her feet reflexively, before wildly leaning back down trying to shield Ginger’s body from Opal who was gaping, mortified, key still in her hand. “Opal!” Kuvira yelped, panicking just a little. “You’re _back_?!”

Opal dropped her bag and covered her eyes. “I’m so sorry! I didn’t see anything!” Kuvira nearly passed out from sheer stress. To make matters worse, Opal was saying, “I just heard—heard noises. Through the door.” And then Ginger let out a laugh.

“I’ve been told I’m a bit loud,” she said. Kuvira wanted to die. Ginger pulled her top back on and got to her feet on evidently shaky legs, holding onto Kuvira for purchase as she adjusted her skirt.

“I’m so sorry Kuvira and—and—”

“My name’s Ginger,” Ginger said helpfully. “You’re the roommate, right?” She looked at Kuvira questioningly.

Kuvira looked regretfully at Ginger. “I’m sorry to ask you to leave, Ginger,” she began.

“No, no,” Opal yelped. “She can stay! Pretend I’m not here! I’ll wear headphones and you two can—carry on and do whatever you were doing!” Kuvira was mortified. “Actually, _I’ll_ leave!” Opal rushed on. Ginger looked amused at least.

“Well, I know _I’m_ satisfied,” Ginger murmured, placing her palm on Kuvira’s arm. “Kuvira?” Kuvira didn’t really blush that often, but her face felt hot to the touch when she buried it in her hand.

“I’m, I’m good,” she said, pinching the skin between her eyes, stressed. Even if she felt like Ginger should reciprocate, the mood had definitely been shot to the moon. “Thanks, Ginger.” Opal’s mouth gaped open.

“Then I’ll just let myself out,” Ginger said, turning back to the couch to grab her purse. Kuvira realized how hasty she’d been to ask Ginger to leave, but, but Opal _was_ her roommate and Kuvira had work tomorrow and—

“Do you want to meet up again?” Kuvira asked, flushing to ask in front of Opal but she wanted to know how badly things had ended up between her and Ginger

“Sooner or later,” Ginger murmured, surprisingly comfortable with being almost naked in front of Kuvira’s roommate. She leaned back in and added in a low voice, obviously teasing, “If you want, she can join.” Opal audibly gulped and blushed furiously.

Heading back upstairs after waiting for the taxi with Ginger, she opened the door to see Opal awkwardly sitting on the chair at the kitchen counter, far away from the couch.

“I thought you and Bolin would be out longer,” Kuvira said nervously, closing the door behind her.

Opal didn’t reply and Kuvira’s heart lurched in her chest. With the exception of the reality that was Baatar, Kuvira and Opal had never acknowledged each other as sexual beings. They barely acknowledged Baatar; it was usually too uncomfortable for Kuvira to even think about him and he was Opal’s brother.

“I know, I just—I couldn’t just—while you and I were arguing,” Opal mumbled uselessly. Kuvira felt a pang of guilt—she’d just been worrying about Opal going out on a date, which had nothing to do with Opal or even Bolin, not really. But she couldn’t deny it was a relief that Opal _was_ back, even if it was under really humiliating circumstances.

“You didn’t have to,” Kuvira offered. Opal shrugged, blushing just as much as Kuvira probably was, not meeting Kuvira’s eye. She was still obviously a bit frazzled from what she’d seen. Despite the radio silence, Ginger had definitely smashed the illusion of Kuvira being a saint that had never heard of sex—sex for fun, at least.

Kuvira knew enough about Opal to know that she was probably a virgin as she’d never been interested in dating. She’d thought maybe that’d end tonight but apparently it hadn’t. Opal’s relationship with Bolin had thrown Kuvira for a bit of a loop because of this but then again, Kuvira knew this was the first time Opal probably saw Kuvira as semi-healthy sexual being, so situations changed.

All the same, Kuvira hoped this hadn’t changed anything too vital and that after some awkwardness they could forget about this. “I _did_ put the proverbial sock on the doorknob,” she coughed, refusing to feel _too_ guilty.

“I know, I’m sorry!” Opal replied, blushing a little and not meeting Kuvira’s gaze. “I mean, I even heard noises before I opened the door, but then they stopped and I—” she cut herself off. Kuvira didn’t know whether she’d rather embrace relief or choke and die. At least Opal hadn’t seen her … _in_ Ginger.

“I’m sorry,” Opal repeated, and she sounded extremely genuine. “And I’m sorry for reacting the way I did.” Kuvira didn’t know what the correct way to react to that was.

“It’s just weird, I still wasn’t it expecting it,” Opal said quietly, looking up at last to catch Kuvira’s gaze. “I’ve just never thought about you—like _that_. I’ve known you since we were kids.”

Kuvira frowned, defensive. “We couldn’t stay kids forever,” she said guardedly. Opal laughed then.

“You’re telling me!” Cautiously, Kuvira smiled. Opal’s expression softened and she smiled too, finally looking at Kuvira.

“Sorry,” Kuvira said.

“There’s nothing to apologize for,” Opal said. She tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, her lips pulled in a gentle, tentative smile. “You’re right, proverbial sock. I just wasn’t expecting it. Now I will be, I guess?”

“No, no you _won’t,”_ Kuvira assured her, leaning forward. “I’ll let you know if I’m having … guests over, ahead of time. This _won’t_ happen again so feel free to forget it ever did.”

“Fat chance,” Opal said breathlessly. “I’m going to text my mom and tell her you’re getting some.” Opal said. It was a joke but Kuvira still groaned. “So, who is she?” Opal smiled, raising her eyebrows encouragingly.

“Ginger,” Kuvira said cautiously, though Ginger had already technically introduced herself to Opal. While Kuvira welcomed the transition away from awkwardness to cordiality she didn’t know if she trusted Opal’s thoughts yet. “She’s an actress. And very closeted.”

“She seems nice,” Opal affirmed.

“Don’t get too attached,” Kuvira said. “Her and I—it’s just fun.” Opal snorted.

“So I heard,” she joked. Kuvira made a face.

“Anyway, our relationship is only a grade above a one-night-stand because we actually know each other,” she said. Ginger was still in the closet for being trans and Kuvira didn’t want to complicate her life further by outing her for liking women either.

“Acquaintances with benefits?” Opal suggested. Kuvira nodded, relaxing and smirking a little.

“Be sure to describe it like that to Suyin,” she joked. “But really Opal,” she added, running her fingers through her hair, a little stressed. “I think we’ve spoken about my sex life enough for one night.” Opal nodded.

“You’re right,” she agreed. “On one hand I’m traumatized because I could’ve done without knowing how apparently great you are in the sack. But, on the other hand, I’m pretty happy that you’re in a healthy relationship after … my brother,” she trailed off, somewhat hushed. She quickly added, “Even if it’s not technically a relationship.” Kuvira coughed, feeling a little uncomfortable for more reasons than one.

Kuvira really liked Ginger but the fact remained that she was just one of the women Kuvira was seeing who was never supposed to be important enough to warrant an introduction to Opal. Maybe someday, when their situations were different, that would change but she didn’t want to put Opal under the impression that Kuvira was in a loving monogamous relationship with … with anyone. That she ever had been.

“There’s a difference between a healthy relationship and a relationship that’s harmless,” she told Opal. “And I really don’t want to talk about your brother.” Or Opal’s mother, if Kuvira was going to be totally honest. “I’m going to take a shower. You can, help yourself to leftovers, I guess.” It wasn’t strictly vegan, but it would just go to waste otherwise so Kuvira knew Opal might finish it.

“Sure thing,” Opal said warmly. Kuvira ran her hand through her hair, still stressed and feeling a little awkward.

“Sorry, again,” she repeated.

“You really did nothing wrong,” Opal replied. “But if you insist on feeling bad, you can make it up to me by trying kale wraps with vegan mozzarella tomorrow.” Kuvira laughed, feeling relieved. Fair enough.

“Except,” Opal spoke up. Kuvira froze. “You two were really uh … having sex in the living room though, huh?” Opal asked. “On the couch?”

Kuvira fumbled. “Uh …” she said dumbly. In Kuvira’s defense, it hadn’t exactly been planned, but she couldn’t even start to consider making that argument to Opal.

“Also,” Opal spoke up, nudging something on the floor with her foot. “This hers?” Kuvira looked. Ginger’s bra. Kuvira could feel her entire face burst into flames.

“Take your shower,” Opal grinned. Kuvira didn’t have to be told twice, grabbing the bra from off the floor and all but sprinting to the bathroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there's an E-rating for a reason, Kuvira's been busy!


	4. Chapter 4

It had actually turned out for the better, Opal knowing that Kuvira was seeing people. It wasn’t out of any sort of shame that Kuvira had neglected to tell Opal about her romantic life, but she’d definitely kept it separate from Opal. She couldn’t help but feel somewhat self-conscious around Opal, seeing as Opal had only ever seen her dating in a wholly self-destructive manner before.

Even now, Kuvira was only seeing people casually, and she’d worried Opal would pass judgement on that, but she actually hadn’t so far. It was pretty relieving to not feel the need to tiptoe around her roommate. Tonight, Opal was going on a date with Bolin, and Kuvira had invited one of the girls she was seeing, Korra, over. It was a good system.

The doorbell rang. “Could you answer that?” Kuvira asked, basically elbows deep in cooking. Korra was a little early.

“Sure, it might be Bolin anyway,” Opal said, pacing over to the door eagerly.

Sure enough, it was Korra. Bolin was never punctual, and Korra was the type to be ten minutes early or ten minutes late but never on time. “Hello!” Opal chirped. “You must be Korra!” Korra grinned and then gasped loudly, theatrically when she noticed Kuvira over in the kitchen.

“I knew we weren’t exclusive but,” she called out, “You’re living with _another woman_ , Kuvira?”

“Childhood friend,” Kuvira replied, not looking up from her chopping board. She hoped that neither of them would say anything weird to each other

“Opal. Roommate,” Opal introduced herself, sticking out a hand for Korra to shake. “You’re Kuvira’s girlfriend?”

“Something like that,” Korra replied, winking across the counter at Kuvira trying to incite a reaction. Kuvira gave her no ground. Korra knew Kuvira’s … commitment issues, for lack of a better word, and had never had any trouble with them. She did like to tease Kuvira at every given opportunity though.

“I’ll get out of your hair soon,” Opal said, pulling her jacket tighter around her shoulders. “My boyfriend and I are going out.” For once, Kuvira couldn’t wait for Bolin to arrive.

“You have a boyfriend?” Korra yelped, dismayed. Kuvira didn’t care to know Opal’s expression but she could hear her giggle, probably flattered.

“She’s _straight_ , Korra,” Kuvira reminded her dispassionately, in case Korra had been getting her hopes up about Kuvira’s _roommate_.

Korra chuckled, leaning on the counter. “That’s _why_ I’m so bummed,” she replied. “Boys suck.”

“I know that,” Opal said, trying to relate, “but, unfortunately, I’m still attracted to them.” Kuvira resisted sucking her teeth in irritation.

“So, you’re a _smart_ straight girl,” Korra concluded solemnly. She smiled at Opal as though they’d at all shared a normal conversation. “Well, I hope you’ve found the one decent guy out there.”

“Korra, you’re _bi,”_ Kuvira spoke up, too irritated to stay quiet. Both of them were being annoying. Korra was too friendly and so was Opal, Kuvira would’ve been better off seeming needy and asking to see Ginger again.

“Mako was a ten among men and a strong five among women,” Korra argued, snagging a piece of broccoli from the pile and popping it into her mouth. Kuvira rolled her eyes as she started grating the carrots. Personally, she thought Mako was more than a three, but they both had intimidating eyebrows so maybe she was biased. Thankfully, there was a knock at the door then. Opal strode to the entrance to let Bolin inside.

“You’re a little tense,” Korra noted, chewing.

“You’re sort of the first girl I’ve let Opal meet,” Kuvira admitted.

“I thought she knew you were into women.”

“Yes, but I’ve not been traipsing girlfriends all over the apartment,” Kuvira said. Well, except for that one time. “I’d hoped you two could act like _normal_ humans to each other, but apparently I should’ve known better.”

“She seems really nice,” Korra enthused. “And I know _I’m_ really nice. She wasn’t judging you.” Kuvira laughed, just a little hysterical. Opal was nice, but she was as judgmental as she was sweet. Korra didn’t know that though.

“Yeah, maybe,” Kuvira mumbled. Korra frowned, as though she were concerned, but she said nothing.

“Not ashamed of me, are you babe?” she asked.

“What?” Kuvira barked. “Of course I’m n-” and realized Korra was kidding. Korra kissed her cheek. Kuvira sighed loudly, untensing her shoulders. “Just don’t say anything _weird_.” Korra laughed.

“You invited the wrong girl over,” she said. Just then Bolin walked into the apartment, and Korra seemed to recognize him. “Bolin?” she asked.

“Korra?” Bolin echoed. Then they ran towards each other and wrapped their arms around each other in a tight, muscular hug.

“Small world,” Korra laughed. Too small. Kuvira’s head was spinning. “Anyway, have a good time on your date!”

“We will,” Bolin grinned, walking over to take Opal’s hand. They beamed at Korra, and wished the women a good night, heading out.

“So, you know Opal’s boyfriend?” Kuvira asked, almost hissing the words when she and Korra were alone.

“Yeah. And I can vouch for him,” Korra said easily. “Bolin’s a good guy. A little naive, sensitive. But he’s a really nice guy.”

“A nice guy or a ‘ _nice guy_?’” Kuvira asked, unable to keep the suspicion out of her voice. Korra laughed again.

“I know you’re worried about your friend, but you don’t have to be,” she said. “I would tell you if you had to. Long-term I don’t know, but on the short-term Bolin is the perfect boyfriend.”

“Short-term,” Kuvira sulked. It sounded like he’d never kept a girlfriend for very long.

“But why are we still talking about straight people when we’re alone?” Korra asked, bringing up a very valid point. Kuvira smiled.

“Alone?” she asked.

“I mean unless this apartment is haunted by invisible spirits or something,” Korra said. “Actually, forget I said that.”

“Fat chance,” Kuvira replied, leaning in closer.

“I’m not suave,” Korra admitted.

“No,” Kuvira allowed. “But you’re effective.”

“Nice,” Korra grinned, leaning in to kiss Kuvira firmly.

<3

Unfortunately, that was nowhere near close the last time Kuvira would have to juggle Korra, Opal, and Opal’s insufferable boyfriend at the same time. Somehow, Kuvira had been roped into a humiliating double date with the other three. Calling it a double date was generous, given this was more of a night-in than anything, with Kuvira playing chef if only to escape the living room.

“I don’t know if you ever explained how you know Korra?” Opal was asking, pushing her glasses further up the bridge of her nose.

“Oh yeah!” Bolin replied. “She used to date my brother.”

“Don’t remind me, Bolin,” Korra begged, laughing.

“And now you date my roommate,” Opal mused. She probably thought she’d be finished with that outside Zaofu. Kuvira was too mortified to even both correcting Opal. “This world really is too small. Is it awkward that you’re still friends?” she asked, taking a drink of water.

“No way,” Bolin said firmly. “We all go way back.”

“Besides,” Korra said, eyebrows raised. “Mako’s almost dating a guy now so it’s only fair.”

 _“Almost?”_ Opal asked, leaning her chin on her hand, curiosity piqued.

“Here we are,” Kuvira said loudly, coming out of the kitchen and setting down the meal on the coffee table.

“Wow, this looks amazing, Kuvira,” Korra said appreciatively. Kuvira resisted preening. She’d tried her hand at a Southern Water Tribe dish—seaweed stew with a side of spicy veggies.

“It really does,” Opal added, smiling softly.

“Thank you,” Kuvira said.

“Smells good, too,” Bolin said. To his credit he sounded like he meant it but Kuvira was about as receptive to compliments from this boy as she was to insults which was to say she didn’t respect his opinion.

She sat down next to Korra on the couch. “Dig in,” she instructed. They obeyed.

“Wow, this is great Kuvira,” Korra praised after a few minutes of chewing. “Almost as good as the real thing.”

“Almost?” Kuvira asked, feeling a little offended given how much effort she’d put in. Korra laughed and slurping. She hadn’t meant any offense.

“It’s good,” she said. “Just different. I’ve just been spoiled by Katara and my dad’s cooking.” Kuvira rolled her eyes and shovelled a spoonful passed her lips. It _was_ good. “How do you like it, Bolin?”

“Uh, I’m a city boy,” Bolin said uneasily. “Food’s food but … this is a little spicy.”

“You _like_ spicy food,” Opal argued cutely.

“Yeah, but this is different,” Bolin complained. “Right?” He looked to Korra.

“It’s different,” she agreed, shrugging. The spices definitely had a unique flavour, sharp and almost bitter. It was good though, in Kuvira’s biased opinion. “But you’re playing a Water Tribe character, right? You _better_ like our food.” Kuvira caught on the words. Bolin was an actor?

“Speaking of,” Korra went on, unwittingly satisfying the curiosity Kuvira would never admit to having. “How’s it like working for Varrick?”

Bolin laughed, a little hysterically. “Oh, he’s a handful,” Bolin said. “But I dunno. I’m hanging in there. It’s a big break, so it’s gotta be worth it.”

“But you’re not … Water Tribe … are you?” Kuvira ask accidentally. And she instantly felt guilt for assuming that he wasn’t, then regret for contributing to the conversation even slightly. This was probably the first time she’d spoken to Bolin directly and she immediately wished she hadn’t.

“Ah hah, no, not really,” Bolin explained. “My mom’s Fire Nation and my dad’s side of the family comes from Ba Sing Se. Also, Nuktuk’s origins are kind of hazy—he was raised by polar bear dogs.” Kuvira supposed that was better.

“Hey, it’s Bolin,” Korra said easily. “I’ll be the token Water Tribe girl to say it’s, okay. Plus, isn’t Varrick Water Tribe? Northern, but still.”

“I hadn’t thought of it that way,” Opal said, concerned. “How many Water Tribe people are on set other than Varrick?”

“The extras and my co-star are Water Tribe,” Bolin said. “Uh … I think they just hired me for my abs.” Kuvira wondered if she could get away with kicking him beneath the table.

“You’re still representing my culture though,” Korra said. “If you don’t eat your greens, you’ll be offending my culture _and_ Kuvira’s cooking.” Looking properly shamed, Bolin went ahead and started polishing off the vegetables. Opal laughed, massaging his back.

“You _could_ afford to be a little more adventurous with your diet,” Opal nagged him, though she sounded fond.

“Look, I was grateful for you introducing me to kale, but I have to draw a line somewhere!” he said.

“Don’t act like you don’t like it a little,” Opal bickered.

“Oh, I _like_ it I just don’t know if my stomach will,” he laughed. “Anyway, I had to go dumpster-diving as a kid, I’m kind of over adventure.” He looked over at Kuvira and Korra, going pale. “Not that, not that this is—at _all_ like—it isn’t—I _like_ this.”

Korra bust out into loud laughter and Kuvira quietly rolled her eyes into her dish.

After dinner, Opal escorted Bolin to the door after a few well-timed hints on Kuvira’s part that it was getting late. “So, I guess you’re not staying?” Opal asked him. Kuvira glared at Bolin over Opal’s shoulder. Bolin didn’t seem to notice.

“Probably not the best idea,” he agreed. Kuvira was going to go to work later tonight so the apartment would be empty but she saw no reason to remind him or Opal of that. “Tomorrow let’s have brunch. Eat some plain rice.”

“Dream big,” Opal agreed. They were cute. It was gross. Kuvira rolled her eyes.

“Goodnight, Kuvira!” Bolin called out as Opal moved to close the door behind them, leaving to walk him to their front door.

“Goodnight,” Kuvira echoed, hoping she didn’t sound too sarcastic.

“So …” Korra smirked as she helped Kuvira clean up the table. “Should I head out too, or?” She let the implication hang teasingly in the air.

“I actually have work tonight,” Kuvira said.

Korra’s seductive expression quickly flipped to dismay. “And you cooked? You should’ve told me! I could’ve helped!” Kuvira almost laughed.

“With what?” she asked, taking the dishes to the kitchen. “The last time you were in the kitchen you set the stove on fire.” Korra huffed.

“The pan wasn’t cleaned properly,” she sulked. “And I can make a _mean_ seaweed stew.” Kuvira couldn’t help but smile as they put the dishes in the sink.

“I believe it,” she promised Korra. Korra nodded to herself. Korra staying the night was tempting but … “I just don’t feel comfortable … not when …”

“When your roommate’s home,” Korra nodded easily, not annoyed or disappointed at all. “I get it.” A brief feeling of relief clenched in Kuvira’s chest. It had been a long time since Kuvira had been in a relationship where someone would get upset if she didn’t drop everything to accommodate them, but her body was still somewhat in the habit of bracing itself for blowback. Not that Korra and Kuvira were in a relationship.

Still, Korra understood the cliff notes of why Kuvira felt so weird about having girls around Opal, even if Kuvira hadn’t told her everything about what had happened. She never pushed, which was great for Kuvira, because Korra was in some ways the closest friend she had.

“Can I kiss you, though?” Korra asked, grinning broadly.

Kuvira smirked. “You don’t have to ask,” she said. Korra’s grin widened and she placed her hands onto Kuvira’s hips.

“I _like_ to ask,” she said. “Consent is sexy, I’ve been told.” Kuvira leaned in, boxing Korra up against the counter, kissing her. Korra laughed into her mouth but returned the kiss, throwing her arms around Kuvira’s neck and dragging her in closer and sinking into it.

Kuvira got into the kiss surprisingly quickly, letting Korra deepen it, as she pressed Korra into the counter. Kuvira at her peak had probably been as strong as Korra was now, but since Kuvira had stopped working out she really had no match and that kind of sent a thrill of excitement and competitiveness down her stomach. She ran her hands down Korra’s side, enjoying the firm muscles there, reaching down to grab Korra’s ass.

“Okay,” Korra broke off, voice low, eyes almost sparkling. “I better head home now or I’m going to make things awkward for everyone in this apartment.” Kuvira laughed, leaning her forehead into the crook of Korra’s neck. Korra gave her a quick squeeze, a hug, and let her go.

“See you tomorrow?” she asked, smiling. “I’ll take you out for dinner.”

“Alright, moneybags,” Kuvira said dryly. Korra kissed her on the cheek and turned to leave the kitchen, almost running into Opal.

“Leaving already?” Opal asked. “You know you can stay, right?” She glanced over at Kuvira.

“Kuvira’s working,” Korra shrugged easily.

“You’re working?” Opal blurted. “You should’ve told me; I could’ve helped with dinner!” Korra looked at Kuvira, amused.

“Night Opal,” she grinned.

“Good night, Korra,” Opal smiled right back. When Korra left, Opal raised her eyebrows at Kuvira. “Seems like you like her.”

Kuvira sighed, a little annoyed. “It’s not serious, Opal,” she reminded her. “We’re just friends.”

“With lots of benefits,” Opal observed.

“Yeah,” Kuvira agreed, guarded. Neither Korra nor Kuvira were interested in turning this relationship into something more serious. They’d figured out and agreed pretty early on that they were much better off as just friends.

And Korra understood, perhaps above anyone else, that Kuvira’s interest in dating other people was a part of Kuvira’s desire to not feel as boxed in as she’d felt when she was closeted, or when she was in a shitty relationship. Opal could perhaps understand that in theory, but in practice she kept looking at Kuvira and Korra like they were going to get married someday and it got under Kuvira’s skin.

“So, when are working till?” Opal asked as she settled in, helping Kuvira with the dishes.

“Late,” Kuvira replied. “So, let me sleep in tomorrow.”

“I’ll be quiet!” Opal promised. Kuvira smiled at her sincerity. Opal didn’t have class tomorrow morning, but it wasn’t like Opal hosted ragers in her free time.

“How’s studying going?” she asked. Opal made a grumbling sound, head slumped, muttering something about all the essays she had to write. “You’ll do fine,” Kuvira laughed. Opal didn’t seem convinced.

“Are you working tomorrow, too?” she murmured. Kuvira shook her head. “Well, I’ll still make dinner.” Kuvira smiled at her. Maybe she and Korra could meet for lunch instead.

“Sure. Thanks.” Opal smiled back. She leaned forward to press her forehead against Kuvira’s shoulder.

“I’m happy here,” Opal said softly. Kuvira hadn’t been expecting those words, but she was pleased to find they were the truth.

“Good,” she replied. She didn’t want Opal to go anywhere, least of all with Bolin, even if he _did_ seem like a ‘nice guy’. An idiot, but nice.

“Go get ready,” Opal instructed, pressing a quick kiss to Kuvira’s upper arm, and turning back to the sink. Something light clenched in Kuvira’s chest.

“It doesn’t take me long to get ready,” Kuvira argued. “I still have an hour.” And that was to leave the house, not show up at the bar.

“Then take a nap,” Opal ordered, shoving Kuvira’s shoulder lightly. “I’ll pack you lunch and finish cleaning up.” Kuvira tried not to smile.

“Thanks Opal,” she muttered. Opal beamed at her.

<3

Kuvira tried to take a half hour powernap but she’d never had a baseline anxiety level low enough for that and that hadn’t changed just because Opal was living with her now. After half an hour of attempting to not stare at her ceiling, Kuvira got out of bed, brushed her teeth again, and started changing into her work clothes.

The Red Lotus liked their bartenders to be kind of dressy, with Republic City-style clothing, sleek and modern, and their hair tied out of the way. Kuvira, who usually oscillated between braids and buns, usually pinned her hair back in a bun when it came time to work. Especially since she’d showered this morning and she doubted her hair would play nice in a braid right now.

The clothes were kind of restricting, though, so rather than switching into them right away she focused on her hair and makeup, just foundation and some eyeliner, and just changed her bottoms into some black dress pants with a lot of give. In all honesty, they were exercise pants and thus incredibly comfortable, but her boss didn’t need to know that.

This all served as a kind of de-stress ritual for her, preparing for work, going through the motions to steel herself for the hours of loud drunks she’d have to deal with. She was going to be on her feet for a long time tonight and the only way she got by was by doing stretches she’d learned in Zaofu. She unfurled her yoga mat, and after doing a minute of jumping jacks to warm up, she got on the ground and started stretching her legs.

She hadn’t kept up with exercise since leaving Zaofu, and especially after breaking up with her first girlfriend. She did a few runs on a biweekly basis, and Korra also had convinced Kuvira to work out with her at a gym not far from Korra’s place, so Kuvira had _some_ muscle definition, but she wasn’t in great shape by any means. Still, stretching had helped her with work, so she’d kept at it.

Propping one leg behind her, and putting the other before her, Kuvira slowly sank into a splits position. The pain was still sharp, but as Kuvira ran a hand along her thighs and sucked in her stomach muscles, she could feel herself getting used to it. She switched legs slowly, breathing in and out.

She could hear someone at the doorway and, catching Opal staring at her, Kuvira stopped. “Old habit,” she said to excuse herself. Opal blinked like she’d not been paying attention. Her cheeks were flushed.

“Oh,” she said. She blinked again. “From dancing?” she guessed.

“Yeah,” Kuvira grunted. Opal gave her a little sympathetic smile but didn’t bother her about it. Dancing was one of the things Kuvira had always loved doing … but she hadn’t done it in awhile. Just stretching.

One of Kuvira’s coworkers, and in all honesty one of her exes, at the Red Lotus, Hwei, sometimes bugged Kuvira about it. They’d both dancers, and had been relatively professional as well, the difference between them was that Hwei still danced a couple of times a week at a local troupe.

Kuvira, half-trapped between not wanting to be reminded of Suyin or Zaofu and not wanting to settle for relegating something she’d been so advanced in to a ‘hobby’, had always turned down Hwei’s offers to attend. And well, then the two of them had broken up when Kuvira had realized she couldn’t do monogamy, making Kuvira showing up an impossibility anyway. At least, this was what Kuvira used as her justification for not trying now, ignoring the fact that Hwei was still very nice and civil and wouldn’t mind.

“Here’s your lunch,” Opal offered, holding out a bag. Kuvira checked her watch as she accepted it. Sure enough, it was time to go.

“Thanks, Opal,” she said, stretching one last time, arms over her head.

“Have a good day,” Opal smiled. “Or night.” Kuvira smirked.

“I will,” she said, finding her wallet and stuffing it in the bag. She went over to her dresser and pulled out a dress shirt and tie. She stripped off her shirt and changed into the new clothes, tugging her tie through her collar. She caught Opal blushing awkwardly by the door.

“Work on your essay,” Kuvira reminded her, easily doing up her tie.

“Essays,” Opal corrected, blinking and walking over to Kuvira. She batted Kuvira’s hands away and fiddled with Kuvira’s tie instead, making it look objectively worse. “There,” Opal declared, stepping back.

“See you tomorrow, Opal,” Kuvira smirked, grabbing her jacket off the hook by the door.

“Have fun,” Opal replied. “Be safe.” Kuvira nodded. And she almost didn’t want to go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For clarification, Hwei is just what I call that one [dancer girl](https://kuvopal.tumblr.com/tagged/old-gf) from Book 3 :)  
> Thanks for all the comments and support this fic has been getting, it means a lot!


	5. Chapter 5

Opal had prepared dinner so Kuvira was helping with dishes. She’d noted that Bolin and Opal hadn’t gone on the breakfast date as they’d promised the night before, so it was as good a conversation piece as any. “So,” Kuvira murmured, trying not to sound stilted. “How are you and Bolin doing?”

“We’re doing okay,” Opal said. “We’re doing really great, actually.”

“That’s good,” Kuvira said. Because it really was good. Opal had gotten on a way better start than Kuvira had a few years ago. Then again, she and Opal had had vastly different lives. When Kuvira had busted out of the system she’d gotten a little screwed up for a year or so. Being an eighteen-year-old on her own in a big city coming into her sexuality had left her vulnerable.

Fortunately, nothing too bad happened, and Kuvira had righted herself before Suyin could intervene. Still, Kuvira couldn’t help but be a bit envious of Opal who’d been born into a family that utterly adored her. Opal had grown up completely protected, and she’d grown into someone worth protecting. Even Kuvira wasn’t immune to that.

Opal’s relationship with Bolin was Opal’s first; she’d never dated in high school despite pressure Kuvira was sure had existed. You couldn’t make Opal do something she didn’t want to do, and she clearly wanted Bolin. Kuvira didn’t get the appeal but, then again, she _did_ slouch against one side of the Kinsey Scale more than the other. It seemed healthy, at least. Disgustingly so.

“We’ve, uh … been trying stuff,” Opal spoke up tentatively, testing waters. Well, this was not a direction Kuvira had wanted her small talk to head.

“That’s, good,” Kuvira said, regretting her awkward reply as soon as it’d passed her lips. Opal laughed at her a little.

“I’m sorry, is that weird to say?” Opal asked.

“No, of course not,” Kuvira winced. “You can be open to me about anything, Opal. I mean—you _walked in_ on me once, it’s not like it’s unfair. And I’m pretty sure Suyin would kill me if I told you I _didn’t_ want you to talk about your sex life.” Opal laughed again.

“It’s not like a ‘sex life,’” Opal said. “Like it hasn’t been a big deal, which was cool. We were both virgins, but it wasn’t some huge event. It’s just been nice.”

Unbearably healthy, that was Opal and Bolin. Kuvira nodded. She wanted to be spiteful and jaded and imply that boys lie constantly about sex, but she settled on a mean, but funny, thought that him being a virgin was believable. But, with pain and regret of _Kuvira’s_ introduction to sex, the insult rang thin.

“That _is_ good, really,” Kuvira said, as earnest as she could be.

“But like, I’ve been trying to have a sex life like a—Opal’s _hand_ sex life,” Opal said. “You know?” Kuvira laughed out loud. “Hey!” Opal pouted. “I’m going to tell my mom that you laughed at me taking charge of my own sexuality.”

“Opal,” Kuvira said through her snickers, finishing off the last dish before washing and drying her hands. “Believe me when I tell you that I’m nothing short of proud of your masturbatory exploits. But there _has_ to be a better way to phrase that.” Opal huffed, though a little grin was already on her lips by the time she finished exhaling.

Kuvira had started masturbating when she was pretty young, maybe too young, and while it had used to surprise her when the women she saw told her they hadn’t started to masturbate until later in life, or ever, it somehow clicked that Opal wouldn’t be the type. While Opal gave off the vibe of the quiet but pervy type Opal had always seemed too damn pure to masturbate. Not that Kuvira had ever thought about it.

“Well! Let’s just say my masturbatory exploits have been less nice,” Opal spoke up.

“Wait, what?” Kuvira asked, confused. “Like—painful?” Her eyes widened. “Like— _kinky?”_

“No!” Opal yelped, smacking Kuvira’s arm. “Like— _you know._ Fireworks? Lightning? All the dazzling metaphors romance novels promised? There’s none of that.”

“I _knew_ you were reading porn when we were teenagers,” Kuvira hissed playfully. “Everyone thought you were _so_ studious.”

Opal laughed again. “Seriously, though. Do you think you could show me how? I seriously don’t think I’m doing it right.”

“Wait, what?” Kuvira asked, leaning back against the sink, sure she’d misheard her friend. “ _Show_ you?” Opal shrugged.

“You’re the resident sexpert,” she said. “Bestow upon me your teachings, oh great Kuvira.” Kuvira looked away from Opal, not believing what she was saying, feeling less amused.

“Damn,” Kuvira said, whistling lowly. She squinted. “Not even going to ask to practice kissing like a semi-normal person, just going to skip that part?” And she’d thought Opal had been having issues realizing Kuvira was not monogamous. Now Kuvira was wondering if Opal thought Kuvira was so slutty that she’d do something sexual with anyone, even Opal.

“I don’t have to practice kissing,” Opal said haughtily, her voice enough to banish Kuvira’s brooding thoughts from her mind, replacing Kuvira’s bewilderment with fondness that was almost instinctual. Still, Kuvira had no idea where Opal was going with this. She pursed her lips and Opal’s eyes widened defensively. “I can prove it, if you want!”

“I’ll pass,” Kuvira sighed, dread building up again. She really didn’t want to kiss Opal but she noticed Opal pulling out her phone. “What’s that?”

“Just ask Bolin,” Opal insisted, holding up the phone in her face.

“I don’t need your boyfriend to text me a review of your kissing skills,” Kuvira said, shoving Opal’s hand away. If Opal hadn’t learned how to masturbate there was really nothing Kuvira, her childhood friend, who’d grown up with her and even been her foster sibling for a few years, would be able to help with. “Besides, bias. And speaking of your boyfriend, get _him_ to help you.”

“Uh, well, that’s the thing, I kind of _have_ been. But um … he hasn’t been able to …” Opal said, putting her phone down. Kuvira looked back at Opal for the first time since the topic had come up, mostly out of shock. She knew men were wilfully inept, Opal’s brother as the best evidence Kuvira had, but it wasn’t fucking rocket science. She was almost angry. Opal, for the first time in their conversation, just looked extremely awkward and unhappy.

“Not for a lack of trying,” she added. “But—all the advice for that is—for me to figure out what I like and help him. Tell him what I like. But I don’t … know …” Opal trailed off, looking helpless. “I feel good … and then I stop. Maybe that’s it?” Kuvira’s gaze narrowed.

“You’ve seriously _never_ come?” she asked.

“I … maybe?” Opal said. That clearly meant ‘no’ and Opal flushed. “I’ve tried but it’s never been successful. I know, kind of embarrassing, right?” Kuvira frowned, heart sinking in her chest.

“That’s not something to be embarrassed about,” Kuvira said. “But … why ask me?” That was probably what was bothering Kuvira the most. As a young closeted girl growing up, she’d done her best not to think about the girls in her life like that but here was Opal _literally_ asking Kuvira to teach her how to orgasm. Opal looked at Kuvira, eyebrows raised.

“I have on pretty good authority that you’re good at it.”

Kuvira coughed, reaching to dry her hands with the dishcloth. “Sorry about that.”

Opal brightened up then, smiling. “But I also _trust_ you. If you could give me some pointers that’d help but I feel like directly helping me would be … more … effective.”

 _“Directly_ helping you?” Kuvira asked, eyes widening. Opal shrugged. This day was already weird enough. “That could get really bad, Opal.” Opal turned away again, blushing. Kuvira found that her heart was pounding in her chest; this was unsafe territory to navigate.

“Forget I asked,” Opal said, voice laden with regret. “I guess Bolin and I will figure it out eventually.” She sounded defeated.

“Ugh,” Kuvira groaned. She did not want to think about Bolin and Opal having sex but worse still she did not want to think about Bolin and Opal having _bad_ sex. She crossed her arms loosely across her chest. “What do you want from me Opal?” she asked, stepping away from the kitchen and ghosting into the living room.

“I just—I just kind of want to know how an orgasm feels like. So I can know if I’m doing it right,” Opal murmured, tailing her. “Just tell me what to do.” Kuvira frowned.

“Just sit back and try touching yourself,” Kuvira said, cycling back to her original issue with ease. “Humanity’s been doing it since before we were humans, there’s nothing I could really teach you. Watch some porn.”

“I _can’t_ watch porn,” Opal shot back, scandalized.

“Just pay the workers,” Kuvira said, suddenly annoyed, crossing her arms tighter. “Hell, I’ll pay _for_ you if you’re not puritanical, just cheap.”

“It’s not that it’s just—whenever I try, I can’t stop thinking about how they’re just acting and not enjoying themselves,” Opal said, rushing to reassure Kuvira that she wasn’t an asshole. “And how it’s probably just super awkward for them and I—personally can’t find it attractive. I feel embarrassed.”

“So, you’re worried about how awkward sex-workers are paid to act around but you’re asking me to teach you how to masturbate?” Kuvira sputtered. “There’s couples’ porn you could watch, or _read_ some porn, at least.” Kuvira couldn’t believe they were having this conversation.

“Porn just isn’t for me. And even when it is, it’s not _enough_. I just …” Opal said. “I _don’t_ think sex is the most important thing in a relationship. And I feel like sometimes me and Bolin would be fine just never having sex ever but … it’s my first relationship and I want to at least see if that’ll change if I can actually … enjoy myself?” Kuvira faltered. “Not that—it’s _awful_ or anything—”

“Fine,” Kuvira snapped. “But you don’t get to be weird about this later.” Opal looked surprised.

“What?” she said.

“Go to the bedroom,” Kuvira ordered.

“What, now?” Opal asked, bemused, already turning her body towards Kuvira’s room. Kuvira shrugged.

“When’s better? If we make plans then we’ll make it an event. Let’s rip off the band-aid.” she said.

Korra’s chivalry towards straight girls putting up with shit from mediocre guys had rubbed off on Kuvira, but Korra knew better than having sex with those girls. This was different though. This was Kuvira helping out her oldest friend. And Kuvira had a hard time believing Opal was straight anyway with the way Opal nearly skipped to Kuvira’s bedroom. It didn’t matter. They were friends regardless.

Opal sat down on the bed, stock straight and Kuvira hesitated for a moment outside the door. Offering had been an extremely stupid, impulsive decision, and while Kuvira knew she could call it off now, and they could laugh it off as some sort of weird joke, Kuvira entered the room anyway.

“Sit back,” Kuvira said in response to Opal’s stiff posture.

Opal gaped. “So, what should I do?” she asked, flushed, already leaning backwards. She seemed excited, and the look in her eyes was intense, simmering, though it was clear she was just as nervous as Kuvira. “Take off my pants?”

“That would be a start,” Kuvira said dryly. Opal laughed a little, Kuvira’s sarcasm putting her slightly more at ease. She still looked very uncertain as she reached for the zipper of her shorts. Kuvira didn’t blame her. She felt like at any moment someone was going to pop out and reveal this all to be a prank but Kuvira knew Opal. Opal wanted this for some reason.

Opal folded her pants up on the side of the bed, though she preserved some dignity by keeping her underwear on. “So, what now?” she asked.

“Now,” Kuvira trailed off. This was a bad idea. “Now, touch yourself.” Opal nodded seriously and slid a hand into her underwear. Kuvira didn’t want to look at her friend’s crotch, or even at Opal’s face, but in her peripheral she noticed her friend’s movements looked jerky and awkward. “What are you doing, Opal?” she asked.

“I’m doing what you told me to do?” Opal said defensively, hand moving.

Kuvira tried not to look concerned. “How is it making you feel?” she asked. Opal bit her lip.

“Not great,” she said honestly. “I feel strange, but not in a particularly good way.” Kuvira frowned.

“Well, what are you doing?” she said. She couldn’t really see what was going on since Opal was still wearing your underwear, her wrist making her panties fold out, obscuring her movements. It was kind of a blessing in a way, preserving some dignity in the situation, but Kuvira couldn’t do much more but give an educated guess as to what was happening. Opal seemed to notice Kuvira’s gaze.

“Oh,” she said, looking down at her groin, blushing deeper. “I’m … I’m rubbing my clit. Spanking my monkey. You know.”

“You’re just—rubbing it?” Kuvira asked cautiously, glancing back up at Opal’s face. Kuvira received the impression that Opal’s definition of ‘rubbing’ might be different than her own.

“Yeah,” Opal said. “Do you think I should be pinching it? Or tapping it? I know some people like getting slapped down there—”

“Spirits, Opal, calm down for one second,” Kuvira said, almost laughing. Opal really was nervous. “It sounds like you really have been—trying your hand at porn. But you shouldn’t be trying to make whatever you _think_ should feel good, feel good, just focus on what actually does.” She hoped that made sense.

She cleared her throat, moving across the room to sit next to Opal on her bed, still preserving some space between them. “Basically, directly touching your clit,” if that’s what Opal was doing, “which is a super sensitive organ, might not be the best idea.”

Opal nodded jerkily, but she seemed to understand. “Try, just touching yourself around that area, but maybe not your actual clit if it doesn’t feel good,” Kuvira suggested. “For now.” Opal dragged a tongue against her lips, wetting them nervously, and glanced down between her legs.

Kuvira shifted, moving to sit closer to Opal. This was still kind of awkward, but critiquing Opal made it a little less so. After all, she was just giving tips, helping a friend out. Kuvira cleared her throat. “Do you mind if I … should I …”

“You can look,” Opal rushed to say, blushing. Shit, this was embarrassing. But Kuvira looked down to get a better judgement of what Opal was doing. Her wrist was twitching between her legs as she obviously moved her hand back and forth, with a frustrated expression, and Opal’s hips jerked but it was clearly more out of reflex than pleasure. Kuvira put her hand on Opal’s arm, touching her for the first time.

“Calm down,” she said. “You don’t need to solve this right now.” Opal let out a shaky, irritated sigh, fishing her hand out of her underwear and clenching it.

“But I want it over with!” she said. “Can’t you just—teach me?” There it was again.

“Seriously,” Kuvira mumbled, heat building in her cheeks. She didn’t feel uncomfortable per se, just _supremely_ embarrassed. “We can just hire someone if you really—”

“Please, Kuvira,” Opal said. “I … you can say no, but I don’t—I’ve heard verbal testimonials about your skills and I … I trust you more than anyone. I swear, this won’t make things weird. I mean. Not weirder than I’ve already made it, and you can put that all on me! I just …” she trailed off, floundering, hands still clenched on her lap. Kuvira’s heart tugged in her chest.

It was obvious that it was nerves keeping from Opal from coming. Skill could only take someone so far. “I really don’t think I could help, Opal,” she said. “You’ve just lived in a house with your family your entire life and now you’ve moved to a new city, you’re attending a new school. You’re stressed.”

“Isn’t masturbation supposed to help relieve stress?” Opal asked, voice barely squeezing its way out of her throat. She was blushing terribly, some awful mixture of ashamed, tense, and desperate.

Kuvira put her hand on Opal’s thigh and Opal twitched. “Opal,” Kuvira murmured, and Opal’s eyes fluttered shut, recoiling reflexively.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. Kuvira ran her hand along Opal’s leg reassuringly and Opal seemed to melt into her touch, relaxing a little. If anyone was going to judge Opal, it certainly wasn’t going to be Kuvira.

“Look at me,” Kuvira murmured. Opal’s eyes opened, bright but somehow calm. Calmer. “Let me know what feels good, let me know what doesn’t. Tell me to stop any time.” She took stock of Opal’s expression. Opal didn’t know what she was asking and Kuvira didn’t know what she was saying yes to. “Unless … you want me to stop now.” Her heart thudded in her chest. She’d made a mistake by offering.

Opal stood up, hands going for her underwear. “No!” she said, pulling them down. “I was just surprised.” Kuvira’s heartbeat resumed unsteadily. That made two of them. Opal pulled off her underwear as well, sitting down on the bed now dressed in only a t-shirt and a pair of socks.

Kuvira kneeled on the ground next to the bed. Opal’s hands were clutched in front of her groin; she was staring straight ahead, blushing heavily. Kuvira frowned. “Are you sure you’re okay with this? Because, we can definitely stop right now, laugh it off, and forget about it.”

“No,” Opal replied breathily, a wild grin spreading across her lips even if she wouldn’t look at Kuvira. “I’m fine. But, I’m scared I’m too nervous for this to actually work!” Okay, so _now_ she was understanding Kuvira’s point of view. It was too late for Kuvira to back out now; she’d committed.

“Well, I’ll just show you what I like. Maybe you won’t come, but maybe you’ll get some ideas,” Kuvira said. She doubted she could make Opal orgasm, especially considering it was Opal’s first time with someone who knew what they were doing. Honestly, she didn’t really _want_ Opal to orgasm given just how much weirder that would make this all.

“Thanks, Kuvira,” Opal said, turning to her friend with a weird sort of earnestness in her gaze. Kuvira flushed then.

“Don’t thank me yet,” she said uneasily.

She stretched her hand out experimentally and reached down between Opal’s legs. Opal grabbed Kuvira’s arm. “Should I have showered?” she asked.

“Bit late for that I think?” Kuvira replied. “I really don’t care.” Opal nodded.

Kuvira glanced down at where her hand was pressed, hovering lightly above Opal’s clit. She reached down further, feeling Opal’s entrance, the heat and hint of moisture there. She pulled up again, placing the pad of her thumb on Opal’s clit, watching her expression. Opal’s face didn’t change. Kuvira began gently touching Opal, massaging the area around her clit.

Opal didn’t pull away and run off screaming so that was a good sign. Awkwardly, Kuvira got up from the floor, hand on Opal’s thigh to steady her, and sat next to her friend on the bed. She returned her hand to its original position, Opal watching her carefully. Kuvira didn’t know how sensitive Opal was, but she knew enough not to risk touching Opal’s clit too much. If Opal had never had an orgasm, leaving her with an aching clit was _not_ going to warm her up to the idea.

She looked away from Opal’s lower half, glancing at Opal’s face before quickly averting her gaze again. It wasn’t as though Kuvira wasn’t used to casual sex, and she tended to prefer it as she hadn’t had good experiences with sex while in relationships. Sex didn’t have to mean anything, and Opal had asked for sex. She was inexperienced but she was straight, as far as Kuvira could tell, and wasn’t the type to make a big deal out of this. Still, Kuvira couldn’t help but be concerned. There was no way of getting around the fact that this was a departure from their usual routine, regardless of the outcome.

“Whoa!” Opal suddenly burst out.

“Should I—” Kuvira began pulling away, startled.

“No!” Opal added just as loudly. “Feels … Okay.” Kuvira frowned, turning back to Opal’s body. A strange feeling burned in Kuvira’s stomach. She knew Opal wouldn’t be mad if she pulled away now out of sheer awkwardness, but that was the thing. Kuvira wasn’t pulling away. Kuvira was teaching Opal how to touch herself, but she could also see the mementos of Bolin all around them. This was wrong.

“Don’t get me wrong. I’ve felt _good_ before. I know how to feel good. I just don’t know if I’ve ever … finished,” Opal suddenly spoke up, voice rushed. Her eyes were clenched tight. Kuvira frowned, taking on the distraction from her guilt easily. For her and her previous girlfriends it seemed like feeling good and following that feeling to its natural conclusion had worked but apparently it wasn’t working for Opal.

“Well I’ll see if I can help,” she said, voice unexpectedly rough. Given how surprisingly not weird this was, she guessed she would actually try to make Opal orgasm, or at least teach her a few tricks.

Opal gasped. “I think you are,” she said. Kuvira bit her lip. Okay, it still was weird. Opal’s body was rigid, chest rising and falling noticeably as she breathed. She wasn’t wearing a bra. Of course, she wouldn’t be, they were at home but Kuvira couldn’t help but notice it now like it was something forbidden. Opal’s nipples were showing through her t-shirt.

“Can I …” Kuvira asked, her middle finger tracing Opal’s slit. Opal gasped, eyes flying open to look at Kuvira.

“Huh?” she asked, distracted. Kuvira bit her lip, pressing her finger against the entrance, then slowly inching it inside, just a hint.

“Ohh,” Opal said, simultaneously realizing what Kuvira was asking and reacting to it. “Yes,” she mumbled quickly. Kuvira slipped further inside her. Opal gasped again.

“Did that hurt? It didn’t seem …” Kuvira asked, a little worried.

“No, I was just …” Opal trailed off. “Different. You just have … bigger hands than me.” Opal was right, she was nervous and Kuvira could feel it. “But I can sometimes fit three fingers,” she added. “So—don’t worry about that.” Kuvira nodded carefully. So, Opal really _had_ been trying.

“Try to relax,” she said. “This is strange but … we’ve been friends since forever so don’t worry. This can’t change that.” Opal nodded then, smiling, and Kuvira could physically feel her body loosen up.

Carefully, Kuvira added a second finger. Opal was still pretty tight. It wasn’t surprising. They weren’t attracted to each other and this was definitely something new for both of them. But, they’d gotten this far and Kuvira wasn’t one to back down from anything … well, anything like this. She turned her thumb back to Opal’s clit, beginning to massage her again, now with a wetted hand. Opal sighed softly and Kuvira watched her carefully.

Opal’s eyes had shut again, and she was beginning to relax against Kuvira, likely thinking of something else, somebody else. That suited Kuvira just fine, this situation was strange enough as it was, and the sooner Opal felt comfortable enough to orgasm the sooner they could forget this ever happened. Perhaps Kuvira’s thoughts had manifested in her moving her thumb a little faster, a little harsher, because Opal gasped, thighs coming together, pressing a vice grip on Kuvira’s hand.

Kuvira looked at Opal’s face, but Opal didn’t look back, her eyes still shut tight, mouth hanging open slightly as she breathed in time with the ministrations of Kuvira’s fingers inside her. Kuvira couldn’t move her hand though. “Um … Opal,” Kuvira said awkwardly. Opal opened her eyes then, blinking dazedly. She looked at Kuvira.

“Whoa. Sorry.”

“Are you okay?” Kuvira asked.

“Mmhmm,” Opal replied, almost lazily. “And you can stop asking. I’ll let you know if anything isn’t working.” Kuvira almost laughed then. She should know better than worrying about Opal. Ever since she was little, Opal had never shied away from voicing her opinions. Her usual soft-spokenness just made her dissent more apparent.

“Alright,” Kuvira replied, feeling a little better. She turned back to Opal, sliding her fingers further inside, thumb continuing to play with Opal’s clit. Opal groaned a little, her hand snaking around Kuvira’s arm to hold her, pressing her breasts against Kuvira’s bicep. Kuvira took in a deep breath and continued to move against Opal.

Opal’s legs were splayed wide open now, giving Kuvira all the access she could want to the space between her legs. Kuvira had shifted from sitting beside her on the bed to almost pressing herself against her, touching her carefully with her left hand as Opal leaned against her chest. Opal’s hips twitched as Kuvira pressed her fingers in and dragged them out, all the while playing with her clit. Kuvira could see and feel how hard Opal’s nipples were through the cotton of her shirt.

Opal made a little moaning sound and Kuvira looked at her, really looked at her. She was flushed, sweating slightly. “Oh …” Opal murmured. “Oh Kuvira …” She was starting to come. Opal’s face twisted in distress. “Ahh …” she whimpered. “I’m sor-sorry …”

“What for?” Kuvira asked, surprised and how deep her voice sounded. Opal bit her lip.

“I didn’t want to make things w—” she cut herself off, moaning again as Kuvira pushed her fingers deep inside her. “Weird. You don’t have to— _Aah_!” She clutched Kuvira’s arm.

“Don’t worry about it,” Kuvira said huskily.

Opal nodded, eyes still shut, and she took her hands back, pressing them to the bed behind her as Kuvira continued gently fucking her. Opal bit her lip, spreading her legs wider as Kuvira leaned in. Opal was breathing was harsh now, her shirt rising and falling with her ribcage. She was really fucking wet now.

Suddenly, Opal’s back arched. “Kuvira!” she whimpered, turning her face to bury her words in Kuvira’s neck. Kuvira tried to look past Opal’s breasts to where her hand was sliding in and out of her. Opal grabbed Kuvira’s hand and pulled it closer to her. Kuvira gasped as Opal pressed down on Kuvira’s fingers, rocking against her hand a little desperately.

Kuvira wasn’t moving now, Opal wasn’t letting her. Opal was thrusting her hips, riding Kuvira’s hand, coming silently. Kuvira didn’t move at all until Opal sagged against her, eyes shut. Then she opened them, a smile crossing her lips.

“Well, I definitely wasn’t orgasming before,” she declared.

“Orgasming?” Kuvira echoed, feeling a little goofy. “Is that even a word, Lit major?” Opal grinned and Kuvira withdrew her hand gingerly from Opal.

“Even if it isn’t, language evolves,” Opal sighed. She ran her fingers through her hair. “Thanks, Kuvira. As weird as this was, you were a big help.” Kuvira couldn’t help but laugh at Opal’s easygoing nature. She felt relieved.

“Yes, well, good luck translating that to Bolin,” she said, too pleased to feel her customary revulsion.

Opal leaned back on the bed, looking overwhelmed and a little excited. “I have to translate that to myself first!” she declared. Kuvira laughed again.

“Don’t let me stop you,” she said, getting to her feet and heading to the bathroom.

“Thanks again!” Opal said. Kuvira rolled her eyes but she felt happy. She washed her hands again. It hadn’t changed anything.

When she headed back to her room, she half-expected to find Opal knuckles-deep masturbating but instead she’d fallen asleep. Kuvira clicked her tongue, irritated but feeling fond. All the same, this meant Kuvira would have to take the couch tonight. As relieved as she was that her getting Opal off hadn’t caused the world to split open and seas to boil, she was _not_ going to risk sharing a bed with her.

Kuvira knew she could poke Opal awake and banish her to the couch without a single complaint, and probably a few apologies, but she didn’t. She brushed her teeth, grabbed her pillow and waddled over to Opal’s resting place. Kuvira nestled into the soft sheets of Opal’s comforter, a blanket Opal had owned even back when Kuvira had lived at the Beifong household. She fell asleep within minutes.

She woke up to the smell of onion and frying egg. Opal had made her a huge breakfast wrap, stuffed full of Kuvira’s favourite vegetables. Kuvira didn’t know if it was from the gratitude of giving Opal her first orgasm, or guilt over making Kuvira sleep on the couch, but Kuvira found it kind of funny either way. The wrap was really good, stuffed with delicious cheese from an unknown and probably disreputable source.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uh..... that escalated quickly?


	6. Chapter 6

Kuvira had had ‘brunch’ with Bolin and Opal a few days later. Really, Opal had been making them brunch and accidentally woken Kuvira up so, awkwardly, Kuvira had gotten up and eaten with them. Surprisingly, it wasn’t any more awkward than usual. Bolin was louder, now that there was no one sleeping in the house, babbling excitedly about whatever nonsense had caught his interest or ire recently. Kuvira stared at him, shovelling oats into his mouth.

Opal also had not even seemed slightly bothered to be in the same room with the two of them, as though that night had never happened. They hadn’t talk about it that much, _yet_ anyway, which suited Kuvira just fine. It didn’t have to be a bigger deal than it was. Still, the fact that Opal apparently hadn’t told Bolin about it … gave Kuvira a weird feeling.

Packing up and leaving for work, Kuvira felt a strange sense of guilt. It was definitely a stupid, impulsive decision on her part to—how should she even call it? Help Opal masturbate? The difference between helping Opal masturbate and fucking her was flimsy to the point of nonexistent, especially since she’d touched her. They weren’t talking about it, and Kuvira didn’t want to but she suspected they probably should. Maybe it wasn’t a big deal to Opal but the last time Kuvira had fucked a Beifong, if this is what this was, things hadn’t turned out that well.

Getting off the tram in the city, as though the universe had overheard her thoughts, Kuvira’s eyes caught on a familiar frame. Baatar. Turning her head away and picking up her pace, Kuvira tried to avoid him. “Kuvira!” Baatar called out. Shit, shit, _shit—_ he’d recognized her. Kuvira walked quicker.

“Kuvira, I wasn’t expecting to see you! Can we talk?” Baatar asked, falling into step with her easily, fuck his long legs. He was surprised, but cheerful.

“I’m late for work,” Kuvira lied.

“It won’t take me long, I just want to talk,” Baatar said. “I just thought we should get closure.”

“I don’t _want_ closure,” Kuvira said, trying not to sound panicked but she was close to vibrating out of her skin with discomfort. _Fuck_ , she’d already started getting emotional. She stopped in place and stared at him. “I want to forget it ever happened.”

Baatar blinked then, looking hurt. “I don’t,” he said. “Even if things didn’t work out, it was important to me.” Kuvira gritted her teeth.

“Sorry,” she said.

“Kuvira, can we just _talk_?” He reached out and grabbed her wrist.

She yanked her hand away, barely resisting the urge to yell at him to not touch her, but she stopped walking. He looked at her quietly as the skin around her wrist crawled.

“Sorry,” he said, stuffing his hand in his pocket, though he was evidently hurt by her behaviour. “It’s just, _Kuvira_ … I really loved you.”

“I used you,” she said, and he twitched like she’d slapped him. Kuvira was astounded that he hadn’t known. All these years, he somehow hadn’t known that. “I used you to hurt myself.”

“I … I see,” he said. Kuvira’s teeth were starting to hurt from how tightly she’d clenched her jaw. “In which case I’ll … I’ll leave you alone.” Kuvira hung her head, willing herself not to feel guilty. If he’d given a shit about her, he would’ve _noticed_ that she didn’t actually feel that way about him.

“Fuck, Baatar, it’s not that I didn’t love you,” she mumbled. “Just not like that. I wasn’t attracted to you.”

“I know,” he offered. “I know you’re a lesbian.” Even if it wasn’t the exact truth, it was close enough. And it relieved her to know he thought about her like that and didn’t condemn her for it either.

“I was just … lonely, and, fuck do we really have to talk about this?” Kuvira asked. She had to go to fucking work and not be completely messed up.

“No, no we don’t,” Baatar agreed. “I’m just in town to meet with Opal and I saw you—it was just a coincidence. But I hope you’re doing well, Kuvira.”

Reluctantly, Kuvira took stock of Baatar. Tall as ever, wearing a semi-fashionable suit, he’d put on some muscle and given himself an undercut. He looked good. Like an actual adult. And that’s how it felt like, running into Beifongs, like everyone was growing up and flourishing except for Kuvira.

“Thanks,” she said, because she wasn’t doing well. “You too.” Baatar smiled then.

“I hope you don’t mind,” he said, “but I’m going to take this as closure.” She blinked at him as he started to walk away. “Goodbye Kuvira! Good luck!”

“Goodbye,” she echoed, feeling a little dizzy.

She heaved her pack onto her back and started making her way back to work, with the distinct odd feeling of waking up from a violent dream. She hadn’t been expecting to see him, even though Opal had told her he’d be visiting Republic City one of these weeks. She hadn’t been expecting him.

She dialed Opal’s number, feeling like she was drifting further and further out to sea with each ring. Thankfully, Opal picked up and Kuvira held her breath. “Kuvira?” Opal asked.

“Just saw your brother,” Kuvira said, hearing her words slur.

“Oh no!” Opal yelped. “I’m sorry. Are you okay?”

“Fine,” Kuvira said. In truth, she wasn’t fine. She felt like she was going to have a panic attack. She felt dirty.

“I’m so sorry,” Opal said. “You were working today so I didn’t think there was a chance you’d run into each other.” Kuvira almost started laughing. “I’ll visit him from now on, not the other way around. I’m _so sorry.”_

“It’s fine,” Kuvira repeated. “Not like I should …” she caught sight of her reflection in a nearby shop window, distorted and weird. Pale and gangly and a little monstrous. That was her.

_“Kuvira,”_ Opal said, cutting in through Kuvira’s fog, grounding her a little. “Is it okay if I come to your work?”

“You have to entertain your brother,” Kuvira mumbled, shaking her head. She was an idiot for calling Opal and letting her know how much seeing Baatar had messed with her.

“It’s fine,” Opal said with a little grunt, as though she started moving. “I’ll tell our landlord to let him in. I’m coming over, okay?”

“I’m _fine,”_ Kuvira insisted. And she was … okay. Even just hearing Opal’s voice had managed to distract her. How fucked up was it that the only person Kuvira had to talk about her ex-boyfriend was her ex-boyfriend’s sister. It wasn’t Opal’s business. Opal shouldn’t have to choose between Kuvira and her brother. “Seriously, Opal, don’t worry.”

“Fuck that!” Opal said, high-pitched and furious. “I _worry_. I _care_ about you so that’s what I do.” Yeah, caring about Kuvira was a tough job.

“I’m at work now,” Kuvira noted. “I’ll talk to you later. Sorry for—sorry for everything.”

She moved to hang up, hearing Opal call out, _“Kuvira—”_ before cutting her off. Guilt gripped her then, but talking to Opal had made her feel better. It had made Opal feel worse, no doubt, but that’s what Kuvira did. She was selfish like that. She took a breath and made her way into work.

“Hey Kuvira,” Hwei called out.

“Hi,” Kuvira said, feeling out of breath as she stepped into the Red Lotus.

“Whoa,” Hwei said. “You alright?”

“Fine,” Kuvira barked. Hwei raised an eyebrow. “Just—just ran into an ex.”

“Oh, another one?” Hwei said, tone light and a little judgemental. She and Kuvira had briefly dated after Kuvira had been dumped by her first girlfriend. But since Kuvira was unable to commit to monogamy or anything serious in general they’d stopped seeing each other. Still, it was different.

“Boy ex,” Kuvira said.

“Oh,” Hwei said, regretful. “Ouch. Sorry.” Kuvira took another breath, and another.

“I’m fine,” she repeated. “Just gonna—gonna get to work.” Hwei nodded, looking sympathetic. She didn’t know a lot about Kuvira’s past, but she could definitely see from context that Kuvira wasn’t having a good time.

Still, Kuvira managed to get into the rhythm of the job, turning on her customer service persona (which Opal and Korra both agreed sounded creepy) and just doing her job. And it got easier. Her heart rate slowed down to something more reasonable, her need to have a hot shower diminished, even if the foggy weirdness she felt never fully went away. Not an hour into her shift, however, a familiar face burst in.

“Kuvira!” Opal called out. She’d actually come.

“Opal, what are you doing here?” Kuvira asked, putting down the glass she’d been wiping. She’d almost forgotten Opal’s plan.

“I came to see you, dummy!” Opal said. “How are you?” Kuvira glanced at her boss, Zaheer, who inclined his head.

“Go on your smoke break,” he said. Kuvira didn’t smoke anymore. She followed Opal outside.

“Sorry for calling you,” Kuvira said, embarrassment starting to flush up her neck. Work had served to distract her from what had happened but, as always, there were consequences she hadn’t foreseen, like Opal standing in front of her now, fretful and demanding.

“I’m glad you did,” Opal insisted. “I never should’ve agreed to let Baatar visit. I should’ve warned you, but I figured you wouldn’t want to know, and I knew you’d be at work at the time, so I thought …”

“It’s a big city,” Kuvira cut through Opal’s panicky babbling. “You couldn’t have known.” They’d just run into each other through transit, otherwise they probably would’ve missed each other entirely. “Anyway,” she muttered. “I shouldn’t have reacted the way I did. It’s not a big deal.”

“Of _course_ it’s a big deal,” Opal argued, opening up her arms and leaning in. Kuvira let her hug her. It felt nice. Opal was good at hugs. Kuvira closed her eyes and let herself relax into Opal’s arms.

“It just brought back some stuff,” Kuvira admitted gruffly.

“Of _course_ it did,” Opal said, increasing the pressure of her hold on Kuvira. “ _How ever_ it made you feel, how ever you reacted, that’s _okay_.”

“I told him that I used him,” Kuvira blurted. Oh shit. The emotions she’d managed to press down had started to bubble back. “Shit, Opal, I really can’t talk about this. I need to work.”

“Of course,” Opal said comfortingly, running her hands across Kuvira’s back. Fuck, it felt _nice_.

It wasn’t the right time to think about what the two of them had done, and Kuvira felt her anxieties about it melting away in Opal’s arms. It didn’t really matter what they’d done, as long as Opal was here with her.

As though reading her mind, Opal said, “We don’t have to talk about it now or ever. I just want you to know that … I don’t know. That I love you?”

Kuvira nodded. Opal couldn’t tell her that everything was going to be fine, or that they way Kuvira had reacted was the ‘right’ way to do so, but she could tell Kuvira this. Opal had never been a liar.

“I love you too,” Kuvira assured her, voice rough.

“Just know what happened wasn’t your fault,” Opal said, squeezing Kuvira close. _That_ was a lie. “You didn’t mean to hurt anyone.” That was probably true. “No one is upset with you for what happened.” The thought of Opal’s mother killed Kuvira’s suspension of disbelief. She pulled away.

“Baatar seems okay,” Kuvira said, changing the subject.

“He still has feelings for you, I think,” Opal said, looking at Kuvira intensely. “But that’s _not_ your fault or your problem. And he’s not going to bother you.”

“I know,” Kuvira said softly. “I … thanks for dropping by, Opal. But I gotta get back to work.”

“Baatar and I are going to stay at a hotel,” Opal said. “We won’t be there when you get home. He’s at the apartment now. I’m sorry, I was going to meet him somewhere but I just … I had to go, and I just wasn’t thinking and I—”

“It’s your place, too,” Kuvira breathed out. There wasn’t much about that place that was Kuvira’s anymore, what with her minimalist style and the way Opal existed, spreading herself out like weeds through cracks in concrete. Opal was uncharacteristically quiet for a moment and Kuvira blinked, looking closer at Opal to see what had upset her.

“Sorry, it’s just,” Opal said. “I don’t think you’ve ever told me that before.”

“What?” Kuvira asked. “It is. You pay half of the rent.” Or at least, Suyin did.

“Yeah, but,” Opal said. And then she leaned in, hugging Kuvira close to her body again. Carefully, Kuvira reached out and hugged her back. “It’s good to hear you say it. To know you feel like that.”

“Opal,” Kuvira spoke into Opal’s soft hair. “Of course I do.”

“I just feel like I’ve made everything more complicated for you,” Opal said. From being Suyin’s daughter, to inviting Baatar over, to convincing Kuvira to get her off. Opal wasn’t wrong.

“Maybe I’m fine with complicated,” Kuvira admitted. “Because I like you.”

“You’re going to make me cry,” Opal whined. Kuvira laughed, leaning away. She put a hand on Opal’s shoulder as she stepped back.

“Anyway,” she said, embarrassment starting to creep up on her. “Thanks for coming.” To save face, Kuvira added a quick, “You didn’t have to,” but Opal just rolled her eyes in response.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” she promised, smiling sweetly up at Kuvira. And this made things so much easier. Kuvira felt like she could breathe again.

“See you,” Kuvira agreed. With one last smile, Opal turned and left. Kuvira watched her walk away for awhile before turning inside.

“Another ex?” Hwei asked when she returned. Kuvira let out a shaky chuckle.

“What? Jealous?” she shot back. Hwei rolled her eyes.

Kuvira could tell Hwei more of the truth, that Opal was related to the aforementioned ‘boy ex’, remind Hwei that Opal was Kuvira’s roommate. But that was a long story and Kuvira had finally gotten herself under control. She could dig this all up another day.

“You’re a mystery, Kuvira,” Hwei allowed, more teasing than condemning. Kuvira winked at her and got back to work.


	7. Chapter 7

The interaction with Baatar had shaken Kuvira, but she was doing better. There were just some things that Kuvira preferred to not think about, and well, work helped with that. Kuvira and Opal didn’t have a lot of chances to talk about it in the next week or two, or define what had happened when Kuvira had gotten her off, but that suited Kuvira just fine. The less she thought about these things the better.

She’d kind of thrown herself into work, oscillating between bartending and recovering from nights. Tonight was a night like any other, sloppy drunks and giggling girls. One of the owners, P’Li, was in tonight so Kuvira was being on her best behaviour. P’Li was super hot but super taken by the bar’s co-owner Zaheer, and Kuvira had better luck with women her own age anyway. It was mindless work.

Sometime around eleven, P’Li tapped Kuvira on the shoulder, and leaned down to murmur in her ear, “Someone’s on the phone for you.” Kuvira tried to not shiver and took out her cellphone. Sure enough, on silent, there were a few missed messages from Opal until Opal finally decided to call the bar.

“Opal?” Kuvira asked into the phone.

“I need to talk,” Opal said, voice grave.

“Fine, I’ll take my break and call you on my phone,” Kuvira said. She explained the situation to Hwei and quickly called Opal on her cellphone. “What is it, Opal?”

“I …” Opal’s voice trailed off, pitched high and uncertain. “Never mind. I’ll see you later—”

“Opal,” Kuvira said, a little annoyed and a little concerned. “What is it?”

Opal’s sigh came out garbled over the phone. “Nothing,” she said. “It’s … ridiculous.”

“Opal!” Kuvira snapped. “Tell me what’s wrong.”

“It’s …” Opal murmured. She was silent for awhile and before Kuvira yelled at her again she spoke up. “I finished all my studying for today and I was bored so I thought I’d take a bath and try masturbating but all I’ve succeeded in doing is get myself really … horny.”

“I’m at _work,”_ Kuvira muttered into the phone, a little pissed.

“Please Kuvira!” was the whining response. “Can you just talk me through it?”

“What part of ‘I’m _at work_ ’ are you not getting?” Kuvira repeated. Opal had never worked a day in the service industry, and it showed. Kuvira _was_ on a break but she’d only taken it early because she’d thought something was seriously wrong. She could practically hear Opal pout over the phone. Opal let out a heavy sigh.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I don’t know what I was thinking.” Kuvira leaned back, relaxing slightly.

“You were thinking with your junk,” she said, still a little annoyed. “Nothing strange about that.”

“I … was trying earlier,” Opal said. Her voice came out high-pitched, stilted. “Trying to remember how you … how you touched me.” Fuck. Opal let out a shaky sigh and, in the pause, Kuvira cleared her throat.

“You weren’t successful, I take it?” she asked, trying to keep her tone measured. There was a brief silence and then Opal muttered a quick ‘no’ as an afterthought, as though she’d simply shaken her head as a response.

“And I’m still …” Opal trailed off. Kuvira’s stomach lurched forward. “That’s why I called you. I was just … desperate.” Kuvira bit her lip.

“And now?” she asked.

Opal laughed. “Social awkwardness pretty much killed all of it,” she said, speaking so softly into the receiver. “Sorry for foisting all this on you, Kuvira.”

“Well, I guess that’s one way to solve the problem,” Kuvira said, running a hand through her hair.

“Yeah,” Opal’s voice came out tinny over the phone, unsatisfied. Kuvira sighed. How sheltered had Opal been that she’d never learned to masturbate? Was this the life path of every heterosexual girl—live in repression until moving away from home and meeting a man? They lived in the age of the internet; this shit was kind of inexcusable.

“Didn’t your mother ever give you ‘the Talk’?” Kuvira snapped, suddenly irritated, glancing around herself in case anyone was able to overhear her.

“Yeah, she’d told me some day I may want to have sex with people or want to touch myself and I never _wanted_ to until now,” Opal said. This did not make Kuvira feel better, but it was beyond feasible, considering the kind of person who Opal was. If anything, the only thing really out of the norm was Opal bothering _Kuvira_ about it now.

“Opal, you knew I was at _work_ ,” Kuvira muttered into the receiver. “Don’t you think it’s kind of selfish of you to ask me to drop everything to get you off?” Silence.

“Yes,” Opal said, voice pitched with guilt. “I really am sorry. I forgot you were—I didn’t think, and I’ve just been trying for weeks, and you’re never around, and I swear I didn’t want to bother you, but I’ve just _never_ been … I’m sorry.” Kuvira sighed, running hand through her hair. Opal had probably been trying to orgasm all these weeks and just winding herself up more.

“It’s fine,” Kuvira said. “Being horny makes us all assholes.”

“Yeah,” Opal chuckled weakly. Kuvira could tell that her words had really gotten to Opal. Opal prided herself on being a good person, but everyone made mistakes. Opal would make up for her transgression, and never cross those boundaries again, of this Kuvira was certain. She bit her lip.

“Opal, I’m happy to help you with—you know, anything,” Kuvira said. “I mean, if you kill someone, you’re going to prison but—” if Opal killed anyone, they probably deserved it “—I’m _glad_ you’re open to me about stuff in your life. Even weird shit like this. Just, you know, not while I’m at work, and not in a way that sounds like there’s been an accident.”

“Yeah,” Opal said. “Sorry for making it sound like that. And I just didn’t know … who else to talk to.” Kuvira frowned.

“You have tons of people you can talk to, Opal,” Kuvira said. “You have a _boyfriend_ , in case you’ve forgotten. You have … Suyin …”

“Yeah but not about this,” Opal said. “If I told Bolin that I needed help he’d just get more—He’d make a big deal about it and get more slobbery.” Gross. “And I need to figure out what I need first before I start telling him what to do.”

“Wait,” Kuvira said. “He doesn’t even _know_ you’re not getting off?” Silence. “Christ, Opal,” Kuvira hissed. “Why the hell are you, of _all_ people, faking orgasms?” She _never_ would’ve thought Opal, who was ordinarily so blunt and hard-headed, would fake orgasms.

“It’s not like the rest of it’s not pleasant!” Opal said. “I _like_ having sex with him.” This conversation was taking a turn Kuvira didn’t want to go down, but Opal pressed on. “Even if I don’t finish, it’s fine but … you showed me what it could feel like, what I could make myself feel and I—I haven’t been able to get it out of my _head_.”

Kuvira took a hesitant breath, having no idea what she was feeling when Opal said these things to her, but feeling them very strongly, like a current running through her body, hand clenched tightly around the phone in her grasp. “When you get home,” Opal mumbled, “could you maybe run me through—”

“Opal,” Kuvira said, cutting her friend off. Opal said nothing, waiting. Kuvira sighed, upping her sarcasm to distract herself from the strange feelings she was having, “I know I’m a goddess in the sack, but I have _faith_ in you. You can massage your genitals until you feel good. I _believe_ in you.”

“Yeah,” Opal said. “You’ve already helped me more than is fair. And you dealt with me sexually harassing you at work. I can figure this out.” Opal sounded apologetic, but uncertain. “Maybe you can write me out a list of things to do when you get back?” Kuvira glanced at the clock on her wall. She had twenty minutes till her lunch was over, and Kuvira knew when she got home she would promptly pass out.

“Tell you what,” Kuvira said. “I’ll talk you through it.”

“Seriously?” Opal asked, clearly surprised.

“Sure,” Kuvira said. “But after this, no more masturbation tutorials. You can call me at work for the inanest bullshit you come up with, but don’t make it sound like someone’s dying. Also, this weekend you’re cleaning the entire apartment, bathroom included, _thoroughly_. And you do the laundry for a month.”

“Okay,” Opal said, too eagerly.

“Also, you’re getting a job,” Kuvira said.

“What?” Opal asked. “Kuvira, I have a full course load.”

“Yeah, yeah, you can work weekends Lit Major,” Kuvira said. “I don’t care if mom and dad are footing the bill; you need to get a job.”

“I’ve been trying,” Opal insisted. “No one’s hiring. Not even for minimum wage entry-level jobs.”

“Well, guess who’s going to redouble their efforts if they want Cosmo’s Top Ten Masturbation Tips?” Kuvira asked. Opal sighed.

“I guess I haven’t gone to the Campus Career Centre to see if they can help,” she said.

“Damn right,” Kuvira said.

“You’ve killed the mood, Kuvira,” Opal sighed. “Now I’m stressed out about life.”

“About time you were,” Kuvira said. She shifted her phone in her hand awkwardly in their silence. “So, have you changed your mind?”

“If I do, then you will—” Opal started. She cut herself off. “You were right … This is selfish. And silly. But, I—still _really_ want your help … I’ll figure out how to make it up to you later on.” Kuvira frowned.

“Opal,” she said. “What do you think Bolin would think about this?” She hadn’t wanted to say it. Implying that her getting Opal off was cheating would mean that they’d had sex, and Kuvira wasn’t totally comfortable thinking about it like that, and she doubted Opal was either. She wondered if Opal had even considered the consequences, or if she thought that since it was between two girls it meant nothing. Kuvira didn’t know which she’d prefer.

“He’d be upset that he wasn’t getting me off,” Opal said. “We’re friends. He wouldn’t be jealous.” Opal wasn’t going to tell Bolin. So. She wasn’t a complete frolicking-through-the-meadows Disney Princess herself. “But, he knows.”

Kuvira started. “What?”

“Not about us. I talked to him before and after the uh … that first time,” Opal said. “I just didn’t tell him who it was with … or why.”

“And he was okay with that?” Kuvira stumbled. “What did you _tell_ him?”

“I asked him if he was okay with me doing things with other people,” Opal said. “I told him that my parents are polyamorous and that I was interested in having a relationship like them.”

Yes, Suyin and Baatar, or at least Suyin, had cultivated an ample ‘polycule’ back in Zaofu. As a kid, well, as a teenager— _no_ , as a _kid_ , that knowledge had given Kuvira some sort of twisted hope. She wasn’t able to see just how misplaced her hopes were until she’d moved out.

“You’re polyamorous?” Kuvira asked.

“Aren’t you?” Opal asked, a little defensively. “At least judging by how many girls you date.”

“I’m, I’m having _sex_ with multiple people, but I’m not _living_ with any of them,” Kuvira said. Or, at least she hadn’t been. “This is … a bit different.” She didn’t want to say it out loud for fear of Opal mistaking what she meant, but Kuvira’s relationships with the girls she’d been seeing, while not exactly monogamous, didn’t exactly fit the ‘amour’ part of polyamory. It was different with Opal.

“Yeah,” Opal said. “I’m probably not polyamorous but. He’s okay with it. He’s fine.” So, this was just sex. Not even sex. But still …

“Did you …” Kuvira asked, feeling kind of sickly even though she knew Opal hadn’t told Bolin about Kuvira specifically. “Tell him about this?”

“No details,” Opal promised. “Not about you. It’s not … what happened is just between us.” Their little secret, without being a secret. Kuvira let out a tense sigh. “I just didn’t want to … hurt his feelings, you know?” Kuvira didn’t know. But it sounded like something Opal would do.

Kuvira shook her head, trying to clear it. If anything, this situation probably suited Kuvira best. Opal was being honest with her boyfriend without inviting him to act as a voyeur. She should’ve known that Opal would handle this situation in a way that would tread on the least number of toes.

“Fine,” Kuvira bit out. “Where are you?”

“I’m—” Opal said, stumbling over her words, clearly surprised. “I’m on my bed.” She added, voice high-pitched and petulant, “The water got cold.” Kuvira didn’t have to picture Opal in the bathtub, white suds clinging her to her breasts and stomach as she reached between her legs, but she did.

“Okay,” Kuvira said, trying to shake the tantalizing image her traitor brain had conjured up. “I’ll just give you some pointers. You can tell me if they’re working, and if they are—that’s all you have to do.”

“Okay,” Opal echoed seriously. “What do I do now?” she added breathlessly. Kuvira bit her lip. This was going to be awkward again.

“Hold on,” Kuvira said. “We’re _not_ going to have this conversation in public. I’m going to the washroom.”

Kuvira punched out then headed to her work’s gender-neutral washroom. It was a single stall bathroom, and she pulled down the toilet seat and sat down on it. She could hear the muffled sounds of the bar outside the door, which she locked. She took a breath. “Do you remember what I did when I touched you?” she asked, all business.

“You, uh, touched my clit,” Opal said after a moment. Kuvira folded her legs, leaning back on the seat.

“Did I?” she asked.

Opal said nothing for a moment, and Kuvira heard a little guttural noise on the other line. “No,” Opal said. “Not at first.” Silence again, but Kuvira could hear Opal shift in her seat. “You massaged around it before that.”

“Yeah,” Kuvira said lazily. “Try that, for a start.”

“Okay,” Opal’s voice came out thin through the phone. Kuvira ran her thumb across her own crotch, electricity burning beneath the surface.

It was difficult to tell someone how to masturbate, since it was something that came so mindlessly to Kuvira. Kuvira glanced at the lock on the door, feeling a little more secure. As an extra preventative measure, she propped her legs up on the door, setting one hand to hang on her calve.

“So,” Kuvira said. “Tell me what you’re doing.”

“I’m just—” Opal said softly. “Trying to remember what you were doing. I’m thinking of the way you touched me.” Kuvira dug her fingernails into her thighs. Opal _had_ to know how that sounded.

“And how does that feel?” Kuvira asked.

Opal laughed. “You sound like a therapist.” Kuvira rolled her eyes. Sexy, Opal was _not_. “It feels good,” Opal admitted. “Not as good as you.”

“Well, practice makes perfect,” Kuvira said. Opal laughed again.

 _“Okay,”_ she said mockingly. Kuvira rolled her eyes, biting back a smile.

“Just keep masturbating, pervert,” she said. Opal laughed, and then stuttered out a small moan.

Kuvira didn’t know what to say to that. They’d kind of been carrying on a conversation, and she didn’t know how to reply to that. She wanted to know what Opal had done to coax that sound out of herself.

“This feels good,” Opal admitted. “I, uh—I’m grinding myself up onto my hand.”

“That,” Kuvira said intelligently, “sounds like a good idea.”

“Any other tips?” Opal asked. Kuvira’s mouth was dry.

“I don’t know how much you can do with one hand,” she offered, knowing Opal was probably still holding the phone with her free hand. “But you can finger yourself.” Kuvira felt her cheeks flush. “It feels good to do both.”

“Kuvira!” Opal whimpered out her name, sounding desperate, and excited.

“Are you getting the hang of it?” Kuvira asked, just as desperately, voice coming out rough.

“Ohhh _fuck_ ,” Opal cursed and Kuvira could see her throwing her head back on her bed, hair fanning out on her pillow like a halo. “I don’t know,” she said in a tone somewhere between a murmur and a moan. Kuvira wondered how fast Opal’s hand was moving in her underwear, if Opal was even wearing underwear when she called. She probably hadn’t been. She was probably lying naked in her bed still.

“I wish you were here,” Opal confessed. Kuvira knew why, but she felt her stomach tighten all the same.

“Pretend I am, if you want,” she suggested, her voice becoming helplessly deep. “I’m with you, Opal.” She leaned forward in her chair and found that she’d placed her hand between her legs. Oh, _fuck_ it.

 _“Kuvira,”_ Opal mewled. _Fuck._

“Tell me how you feel,” Kuvira murmured, as though she was divorced with no personal stake in the matter.

“I feel good,” Opal confessed. “Better than I ever have when I tried by myself.” Opal laughed then, sounding strange, almost like a sob, over the buzz of the line. “Guess I’m not by myself, huh?”

“Whatever works,” Kuvira said easily, spreading her own legs slightly. “Keep doing it.” She might as well have been including this in her advice.

“I like,” Opal said. She took a breath. “I liked it when your fingers were in me.” Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh _fuck._ Opal _had_ to be saying stuff like that on purpose.

“Yeah?” Kuvira asked, trying desperately to come off as casual. She hiked her skirt up and pulled her underwear down one leg, letting it dangle loosely on her ankle. “We can do that,” she said.

“Okay,” Opal said. She let out a little noise. Kuvira clamped her thighs together, trying to get herself under control. “Ah—I’m in.” Kuvira couldn’t help but laugh at that.

“You sound like a hacker,” she teased.

 _“Kuvira,”_ Opal whined. But then she let out another moan, and their humour died. “Wow,” Opal murmured breathlessly. Opal gave out a little grunt. “This feels so good,” she murmured. Kuvira waived all formalities, reaching beneath her legs to slide two fingers to the hilt inside of her. She was rewarded with a little wave of pleasure running through her gut, relieved.

“Tell me what you’re doing,” Kuvira murmured, closing her eyes and tugging her fingers inside of herself.

“I’m—” Opal said. “I’m rocking myself on my fingers and—and rubbing my clit with the rest of my hand.” Kuvira bit her lip and did the same.

She was so wet, to the point where every shift of her fingers made her worry that Opal could hear her through the phone. She wished she could hear Opal. It was depraved, but she did. Hear Opal’s moans, the sound of her hand moving in and out of herself, the sound of her breathing. Kuvira felt like she was on fire.

“Could you talk to me?” Opal asked desperately. “It helps.” Kuvira could’ve come just then.

“Sure,” Kuvira said quickly, voice coming out uneven. “But you really sound—” she could hear Opal’s breathing, it was distracting, intoxicating, “—like you’ve figured this out.”

“No, no,” Opal lied desperately. “Talk to me. _Please._ ”

Kuvira had to consciously keep herself from moaning because she couldn’t stop touching herself. She licked her lips, sliding her fingers into herself. “How many fingers?” she asked.

“Just two,” Opal whimpered. “Should I add more?” Kuvira massaged herself furiously, just to ease some of the ache.

“You don’t have to,” Kuvira said. “But I want you to take your free hand and touch yourself with that too.”

“Aah-oh, Kuvira,” Opal moaned. “But I—I only have one hand free.” Kuvira sped up her movements, ruthless.

“Figure it out,” Kuvira muttered. Opal made another desperate noise. She’d liked that.

“Oh—okay,” Opal squeezed out. Her voice was a little louder. Kuvira could imagine her pinching her phone between her shoulder and her cheek. “Okay what now?”

“Do you feel good?” Kuvira asked, snapping her fingers in and out off herself, shifting her hips to ride herself on her hand.

“Yes,” Opal replied. “Desperate.”

“Just from your hand, deep inside you,” Kuvira murmured. “You learn fast.”

“Uhh, yes,” Opal mumbled. “I’m a—uh—oh, _fuck_ , a fast learner. Put _that_ on my résumé.” Kuvira licked her lips.

“Think you can touch your clit with your free hand?” Kuvira asked. “Nice and gentle. Just … _touch_ yourself.”

“Yeah, _yeah—”_

Kuvira threw her head back, sliding her fingers deep into herself, curling and just fucking her g-spot, thrusting her fingers up against it one, two, three—“Touch yourself and tell me how you feel,” she got out.

“I just, I feel so _good_ Kuvira I didn’t know I could feel so _good—ohmy—ah,”_ Opal gasped. And her moans were squeezed into nothingness. _“Ah,_ oh my—fuck, fuck, ah— _fuck!_ ” Kuvira could see her, her hips raised in the air as she chased her hand, picture her breasts bouncing as she thrust herself onto her fingers.

 _“Kuvira,”_ Opal moaned, almost yelled, as though she couldn’t believe what she was saying.

Kuvira bit her tongue and came with a choked grunt. She could hear Opal coming too, curses interspersed with Kuvira’s name. The way Opal’s voice held Kuvira’s name, that pulled Kuvira right through her orgasm as she rode her hand into oblivion.

The moment she came back down she instantly felt guilty. And paranoid. When was she going to be fired? She shook her head. Kuvira was rarely impulsive and she was usually impulsive for the right reasons, or at least for reasons which had been building for awhile, but this? This was just a bad decision. She could hear Opal gasping on the other line, panting like she’d just finished a sprint.

“How was—” Kuvira asked, to try to distract from the fact that she’d just orgasmed alongside Opal. “How was that?”

“That was really good,” Opal said honestly. “I can’t believe … I could make myself _feel_ like that.” Kuvira heard her draw a breath. “ _Thank you.”_ Her voice was coloured with gratitude.

“That was all you,” Kuvira dismissed, face flushing, her voice low. She cleared her throat.

“I’ll see you tonight?” Opal asked.

“My shift ends at 3,” Kuvira replied.

“I’ll see you,” Opal replied. They said their goodbyes and hung up the phone, leaving Kuvira with just her thoughts and a pair of discarded underwear.

Kuvira felt like a gigantic creep. Opal didn’t know Kuvira had masturbated alongside her. It wasn’t that Kuvira was thinking about Opal in particular, and she wasn’t attracted to her, but—the sounds Opal had been making. Kuvira couldn’t lie about the way they’d made her feel.

Opal couldn’t begrudge her this. Kuvira had literally helped Opal come. Like, there was no way Opal could make her feel bad about enjoying herself in the process. And it didn’t mean anything. The sounds Opal made were hot, _moans_ were hot. That was just Kuvira’s body reacting like as anyone would listening to someone gorgeous get off—not that Kuvira thought Opal was gorgeous, this—

This was stupid. Kuvira pulled her underwear back up over her hips and wandered over to the sink. She watched her hands thoroughly and then splashed her face with water, glancing at her reflection. She looked, flushed, disheveled, like she’d just masturbated in the fucking bathroom on her lunch break. This was stupid. And her lunch break was over.

“Family emergency?” Hwei asked when Kuvira came out.

“Hell no,” Kuvira managed, horrified at the thought.

“Hmm,” Hwei intoned, jealous and knowing. Kuvira had spent a long time on break, probably over the half hour she was permitted. And while Hwei had been pretty amicable about their breakup, Kuvira had always done her best to keep the crossover between the girls she was seeing and Hwei. Not that Kuvira was seeing Opal.

“It wasn’t my girlfriend,” Kuvira offered.

“Of course not,” Hwei said, suddenly more irritated. “You don’t have girlfriends.” Then she turned around and started helping a patron. Kuvira felt yet another flash of guilt. Still, though she went back to work with an empty stomach, she came home that night to a spotless apartment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The girls are back on their bullshit. so embarassed I wrote this jfc ⁄(⁄ ⁄•⁄-⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄


	8. Chapter 8

They’d curled up on Kuvira’s bed, binge-watching Russian Doll together. To both of their credit, they hadn’t really talked about what had happened last week. In general, they’d gotten pretty good about not talking about this stuff directly. But still, Opal regarded Kuvira with what felt like something new.

The way she smiled at Kuvira lately. It wasn’t—wasn’t sexual or even overly flirtatious, but it was secretive. Like the two of them knew something no one else did. As though they were in on some joke together. And Kuvira would be a liar if she said that that look didn’t make her gut squirm with delight. Still, they were just friends, somehow. Opal had demonstrated no interest in pushing what they had to anything else. They were still only friends, roommates.

Roommates, that were essentially spooning on the same bed, and nearly holding hands with the way Opal was playing with Kuvira’s fingers. Kuvira did her best to ignore it, looking over Opal’s shoulder at the laptop, as Opal sighed and shifted in place, obviously at least a little distracted. But even Opal gave in after awhile, getting wrapped up in the show.

“I love the lesbians,” Opal observed at one point, smirking at the screen at one of the characters, breaking Kuvira away from her reverie. “Especially the mean one. She’s really funny.”

“I think they’re both bi,” Kuvira offered up to the conversation. She’d already watched this show but didn’t mind watching it again. Something about volatile mother-daughter relationships had gotten to her. “They sleep with guys sometimes.” Opal shrugged, accepting it.

It seemed like Opal really was okay with the ambiguous relationship they had now, even though she’d always struck Kuvira as the kind of person that needed things completely defined so as to not tread on anyone’s toes. Maybe it’s just what Opal needed to justify dating Bolin and sleeping with Kuvira. It wasn’t really Kuvira’s business. But it got under Kuvira’s skin that this bothered her more than it seemed to bother Opal. Maybe Kuvira was the one who was getting tired of ambiguity.

“I’m not a lesbian, by the way,” Kuvira chanced since they were tangentially on the topic. She’d been meaning to tell Opal for awhile, and now was probably as good a time as ever. She joked, “Keanu Reeves is too hot.”

“You know, finding male celebrities attractive doesn’t have to mean you’re bi,” Opal said conversationally, still playing with Kuvira’s hands, not at all floored by her confession.

“Well, it does for me,” Kuvira snapped, sitting up. Of all the ways she’d expected, or not expected, Opal to react—Kuvira hadn’t thought that Opal would essentially deny Kuvira’s confession.

Opal blinked, clearly hurt by Kuvira’s tone. Kuvira swallowed down her guilt. “Whatever,” she choked out, getting off the bed and moving on to the kitchen. She hadn’t wanted to come out to Opal like this. There was a chance she’d just been overreacting and Opal had just been speaking about lesbians generally.

Still, it was clear that for Opal so much of her excusing Kuvira’s behaviour about Baatar was wrapped up in the thought that Kuvira was a self-hating lesbian. Kuvira was a self-hating bisexual, an important distinction, and it still didn’t mean that Kuvira should’ve been okay with the situation she’d been in. That Kuvira would only not deserve the pain she’d experienced if she’d not been physically capable of attraction to men.

“Sorry,” Opal called out, hushed. She followed Kuvira into the other room, blanket cinched around her shoulders. “It’s just … I’ve only ever seen you date girls …” Kuvira snorted.

“Sorry I’m not dating _exactly_ fifty-fifty,” she bit out, pouring herself a glass of water. “I know that invalidates the whole bisexuality thing.”

Opal flinched again. “Kuvira, I didn’t mean that,” she said softly, reaching out tentatively to touch Kuvira’s arm. Kuvira let her. “I know we can grow and change the way we think about ourselves, but the last time we talked about your sexuality …”

“Yeah,” Kuvira said, hanging her head. “I know.” She’d been convinced she was a lesbian at the time, and Opal was just going off of that. But Kuvira had finally gotten comfortable with finding men attractive, neither feeling pressure to act on her attraction nor any urge to strip herself of it as though her feelings for men could taint her feelings for women. She’d beaten herself about everything regarding her sexuality since the moment she’d had one, and she finally felt like she was crawling out of that pit.

“But I’ve changed since then,” Kuvira said, still uncertain as to how much she had. She and Opal weren’t teenagers living under Suyin’s roof anymore.

“I know that,” Opal said softly, eyes wide and earnest. The look she was giving Kuvira was both intense and warm. It was hard to meet, and Kuvira had to look away.

“Maybe I _am_ a lesbian,” she admitted. She felt guilty. It wasn’t exactly fair for her to snap at Opal for something she still wasn’t totally certain about herself. “I’ve never actually dated a guy. I mean, one I was attracted to, anyway.” She sighed. “Honestly, I don’t know, Opal.”

“Indecisiveness,” Opal said, smiling a little at her own joke. “Classic bisexual trait.”

“Oh, shut up,” Kuvira grouched, but it made her feel better.

“It doesn’t matter if you’re a lesbian or bisexual,” Opal said sweetly. “You’re still _you_ either way.” That wasn’t the most complimentary thing Opal could’ve said.

“I mean, I have no plans to date men right now, or ever,” Kuvira said, frustrated. attractive was hard to talk about. “But I don’t want to … hate myself for finding random guys cute. And I know finding random guys attractive isn’t _necessarily_ enough to revoke someone’s lesbian card but I just—for me it’s just—I don’t—”

“It’s complicated,” Opal surmised. There she was, the enlightened straight girl.

“Yeah,” Kuvira grunted. “This just makes the most sense for me.” Opal smiled.

Kuvira fiddled with her glass. In the past, she’d felt like she was either gay or straight. Because then she could _lie_ to herself that she didn’t like women, or men, on different days, for different reasons. It just wasn’t sustainable, because it wasn’t true, not for her.

She sighed. “I’m not that choosy.”

“I think you’re _kind_ of choosy,” Opal argued.

“The fact that all the women I date are beautiful is because all women are beautiful,” Kuvira disagreed, winking, and Opal rolled her eyes. “And I just … I don’t know, it’s not like I’d be opposed to meeting a good, handsome guy to settle down with. I just don’t see it happening any time soon and I’m not going to waste my time seeking him out after … after the shitshow that was the last time I tried to date a boy.”

“Kind of funny that you think of settling down with a guy but you’re casually dating all these girls,” Opal pointed out.

“Wow,” Kuvira said. “Who are you, my therapist?”

“You have a therapist?” Opal asked. Kuvira snorted.

“Not since Zaofu,” she said. “Anyway. I’m just not gonna think about it for now. I’m really … _not_ the settling type, for men _or_ women. I’m just—gonna enjoy myself and … I don’t know … work.” Opal made a little hum of consideration. But she didn’t argue, following Kuvira back in her bedroom.

“Hey, Kuvira, is it okay if I sleep here tonight?” Opal asked, clambering onto Kuvira’s bed. “My back’s been hurting.” That was a surprise. Kuvira thought Opal’s bed was pretty plush, but maybe that was the problem. Everyone Kuvira had taken home had really liked her bed, despite how rigid it was. It gave people proper support, probably.

“Having problems sleeping?” Kuvira asked, reaching over to turn off the light on her side.

“Just thinking,” Opal said fretfully. Then she turned to Kuvira with an intense gaze. “I’ve been reading romance novels for—research.”

“Makes sense,” Kuvira said, only half-mocking.

“And um … is touching your boobs actually supposed to feel good?” Kuvira shrugged, surprised with the change of conversation. But then, she was the one who had dumped out all her bisexual baggage onto Opal.

“Well, I enjoy it,” she said, shifting in bed to get closer to Opal, closer to the position they’d originally been in while watching Netflix though neither of them had made any move to start the show up again.

“I’ve tried but my nipples just get sore,” Opal replied, frowning. Was she really inviting Kuvira to think about her boobs?

“Maybe it’s just your body,” Kuvira said. “Nipple-play is definitely not the intended purpose of breasts.” Or, maybe it was, Kuvira hadn’t been a biology student. Opal was not satisfied by Kuvira’s explanation either way.

“Or _maybe_ I don’t know what I’m doing,” she said, raising an eyebrow. Kuvira could already tell where this was headed.

“Ugh,” she grumbled. Opal widened her eyes, pouting. “No,” Kuvira said.

“What?” Opal asked with faux innocence, always able to feign innocence and avoid responsibility for whatever they had going on between them.

“ _No_ Opal,” Kuvira said sternly, feeling like she had half a mind to buy a squirt bottle to spritz Opal with whenever she got horny, though Kuvira would be lying if she said the way Opal was so excited about sex, the way she kept turning to Kuvira for help with little to no modesty, was kind of blowing her mind and making it hard to think.

“How long were you even thinking about that?” Kuvira asked, almost hysterical, since it was clear that this was something that had been on Opal’s mind. The way she’d been playing with Kuvira’s hands, pressing her back all the way up close to Kuvira’s front, making room for herself in Kuvira’s arms without question. “Since we sat down?”

“Uhh,” Opal said. “Since episode two,” she decided delicately, like that made it any better. “And maybe last week.” Which made more sense.

“If it makes you uncomfortable I can stop,” Opal said, turning around a little to look at Kuvira, earnest and obviously a little worried. It wasn’t like she’d been holding back talking about this because she’d been certain Kuvira would be receptive.

“No, it’s, I mean,” Kuvira attempted. The truth was, what made Kuvira uncomfortable about this was how _not_ uncomfortable it felt. How natural and normal it was, how almost inevitable it felt. That all probably showed on her face, because Opal’s look of concern started melting into a grin. “It’s fine. I just don’t think that I could help. With that.”

“Come on,” Opal cajoled, teasing. “You can’t say no to this face, right?” Opal stared back at her. Kuvira sighed, pushing up Opal’s shirt to uncover her breasts.

“This is just for educational purposes,” she said, feeling half weary and half excited. Opal grinned, leaning back on the bed.

“Mm-hmm!” she said agreeably. She wasn’t wearing a bra.

“No orgasms,” Kuvira said firmly.

“Won’t be a problem!” Opal approved. Kuvira sighed, letting herself really look at Opal’s breasts.

Opal’s nipples were already hard in the evening light. She’d been anticipating this, or at least hoping for it, and Kuvira didn’t know whether to kick her out of bed or swallow her up right then and there. She settled by placing her hand to cup the breast closest to her, getting Opal used to her touch.

Opal didn’t have as large a chest as Kuvira did but … abstractly it was … nice. Pretty, even. Then again, Kuvira had never seen a chest that she couldn’t appreciate on some level, even a childhood friend’s. She ran her thumb across Opal’s left nipple before leaning down to gently press her tongue on it.

Opal, to her credit, didn’t flinch but she seemed to turn her whole body to face Kuvira. Kuvira felt a little awkward then. She cupped Opal’s breast and ran her tongue across her nipple again, before wrapping her mouth around it, pulling it between her lips. Opal gasped then, quietly enough to barely be heard but Kuvira was listening.

She traced the nipple again, pulling it deeper into her mouth, and then inching her mouth along the rest of Opal’s breast, as though she was going to swallow Opal whole. Then she pulled her mouth away, letting cold air hit Opal’s bare skin, briefly returning to lap at Opal’s breast before placing her mouth on it again. She tried gently sucking on Opal’s skin, reaching for the other breast with her free hand.

Opal’s skin tasted good, fresh and clean from the shower, almost sweet. Kuvira ran her thumb across Opal’s other nipple before gently pinching it between her two fingers. Opal let out a keening sound then, legs pressing together. Kuvira moved her mouth away from Opal’s breast, letting it slide out from her lips slowly.

“How does that feel?” she asked. Opal said nothing for awhile, apparently processing Kuvira’s question.

“I—I don’t—” Opal murmured, arching her back. “Try again?” It probably felt alright then. Kuvira shifted her body, gaining better access to Opal’s chest. She returned her lips to Opal, running her tongue across the offered nipple before sealing her mouth around it, sucking tenderly.

“Ah!” Opal whimpered softly. Kuvira pulled off of Opal’s breast, pressing a kiss on Opal’s clavicle before moving to the other side. She lapped her tongue against the other nipple, wrapping her lips around it, then pulling it deeper into her mouth. She hoped Opal was enjoying this. Kuvira was. Too much.

“Nnnhn,” Kuvira mumbled, pulling away. “How was that?”

“Aah …” Opal sighed. “Huh? Oh. Why did—Please. Keep—that.” She hadn’t been paying attention. “Keep going.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Kuvira asked.

“Kuvira!” Opal whined. Kuvira rolled her eyes, leaning down to touch Opal’s chest again. Opal let out a content little sigh as Kuvira leaned down over her. She ran her tongue teasingly along Opal’s nipple before taking it into her mouth and letting gravity pull it out again. Opal moaned deeply, clutching the back of Kuvira’s arms and running her fingers through Kuvira’s hair.

Ugh, this was bad. It was bad because Kuvira’s body didn’t care who was making those sounds, didn’t care that that was _Opal_ , Kuvira’s platonic _friend_ , sounding closer and closer to getting wrecked. And the space between Kuvira’s legs was starting to pound, throb, as though trying to remind Kuvira that it existed. Trying to coax her into touching it.

Opal let out a little cheep of surprise where Kuvira’s teeth cut into her breast a little, but she didn’t sound upset at all. Her hand reached up to grip Kuvira’s upper arm as Kuvira moved back to the other breast, paying an equal amount of attention to it as she had the first. And she kept moaning, with each little movement Kuvira made, to the point where Kuvira felt out like she was going out of her mind.

There was _no way_ Opal was that sensitive, she _must_ have been playing it up a little. And, if she was, it was working. But Kuvira wasn’t going to touch herself because she’d told Opal that orgasms weren’t going to be involved with this. But in all honesty she was ridiculously close to just jumping off the bed and abandoning Opal to go sit under the bath faucet for two hours just to get over this.

She shifted closer to Opal, swinging a leg between them to kneel at the junction of Opal’s thighs, trying to distract herself from the hot ache she was feeling. Opal reached up to her, her hands holding tight to Kuvira’s shoulders as Kuvira took up playing with her breasts with new vigour. Opal tipped her head back, moaning, and her hips shifted further down.

Kuvira didn’t notice it at first, but then she felt the undeniable press of the flat of Opal’s crotch against her thigh. And then it was gone, and Kuvira dismissed it, it must have been an accident, or perhaps even her imagination though her skin felt like it had been burnt from where they had touched. And then she’d felt it again, warm and humid, the drag of Opal up Kuvira’s thigh. Christ.

And Kuvira had been almost ready to let it happen, kissing Opal’s breasts and listening to Opal’s unbelievable moans. But she’d said they weren’t having sex, and as Opal’s breaths got faster and higher pitched, as she started to get bolder with her grinding, Kuvira knew she had to stop it. If Opal thought she was being subtle by pressing herself down onto Kuvira’s leg, no matter how briefly, she was mistaken.

“Opal,” Kuvira said, voice deep with warning.

“Sorry,” Opal gasped, guilty, untangling her limbs from Kuvira’s and twisting her torso so her legs were away from Kuvira’s. She opened her eyes, cheeks flushed. “Did I fuck up?” _Can we keep going?_

“No,” Kuvira said. “But we’re not going to have sex.”

“Yeah,” Opal said breathlessly. She brought her knees up, drawing the heels of her feet up against her thighs, looking small. Kuvira had a sneaking suspicion that if she looked south she’d find Opal totally drenched. “Do we have to stop?”

Kuvira looked at her friend. Opal seemed almost desperate in the dim light cast by the city. “No,” she allowed, reaching out to pull Opal’s legs back down, moving out of the way of them because clearly that position was too much of a temptation for Opal. She leaned back down to Opal’s chest, their legs a safe distance from each other, and pressed an affectionate kiss on Opal’s nearly nonexistent cleavage. She was ridiculous.

Kuvira lay down on the bed next to Opal, and put a hand on Opal’s ribcage to keep herself from reaching between her legs. Opal turned herself to face Kuvira completely, puffing up her chest like she was trying to be proud but really Kuvira knew she was just trying to get Kuvira’s mouth on her again. Kuvira grinned and reached out, hand carding up Opal’s ribs to cup her breast, suckling it into her mouth. Opal sighed, sounding complete.

Kuvira felt the bed shift beneath them as Opal’s hips twitch. She moved over Opal’s chest, glancing southwards. Sure enough, Opal had snuck her free hand between her legs. Little cheat. But it worked as a loophole. Kuvira trailed her tongue around Opal’s nipple. If she told Opal to stop, she knew they’d both have to stop, and calling attention to this, to how much they both wanted it, made it more dangerous than just ignoring it.

And shit, Kuvira had to admit it was sexy, listening to Opal come undone, and get this far just from Kuvira’s mouth on her chest. Opal, who’d never come in her life, now touching herself because Kuvira’s tongue on her breasts was _that_ good. It was great for Kuvira’s ego, to say the least, and that’s all that was. It wasn’t because the sounds she was making sounded straight out of some high-quality porn, almost exaggerated, and listening to moans like that was enough to get Kuvira off in most situations.

Opal stifled moan after moan with unbelievable high-pitched grunts. Kuvira wasn’t equipped to handle this. She wanted her mouth on Opal. She wanted to fuck herself onto Opal’s inexperienced face. She wanted Opal’s tongue wrapped up on her the way she was treating Opal’s nipples. She wanted, she _wanted_. Ugh, she wanted Opal to fuck her.

Against her will, Kuvira let out a moan around Opal’s breast at the thought, and Opal moaned louder in response, body tightening. Christ, she was coming. Thrusting her chest up into Kuvira’s hot mouth and Kuvira accepted it, like she was hungry for it, like she was thirsty, like she was between Opal’s legs lapping her up. She pretended Opal wasn’t coming but still coaxed her through her orgasm, Opal’s whole body lighting up when Kuvira touched her just right.

Eventually Opal’s body started to settle, still twitching every now and then in her aftershocks. Kuvira glanced up at Opal’s face, flushed and sweaty, eyes screwed tight. Her mouth was hanging open, sounds choking in her throat. Kuvira bet that … that if things were different, Opal could be a screamer. She trailed her tongue across the subtle pinkening mark she’d bitten into Opal’s skin, then moved back.

“Thanks, Kuvira,” Opal said, acting as though she hadn’t just come. Kuvira suddenly felt a little uncomfortable, a little resentful, and not a little bit horny.

Kuvira felt tempted to ask Opal if any of her ‘lessons’ had paid off for her and Bolin’s situation, but she’d quickly realized that that wasn’t a question she wanted answered. She really didn’t like to think about men and women having sex with each other, especially when one of the people involved was her childhood friend.

“Go to bed, Opal,” she replied roughly. She got up, patting Opal’s shoulder to let her know she wasn’t really mad, though she kind of was, and she headed to the bathroom to. To what?

To brush her teeth. To get ready for bed. And her entire body was aching with what had just happened. She went to the bathroom, fully intent on just brushing her teeth and going to bed. But she couldn’t get the sounds Opal was making out of her head. And as it was, as soon as she’d closed the door behind her, she’d almost collapsed with desire.

She leaned over the sink and reached between her legs and started fucking herself in earnest. Her legs almost buckled with how much she wanted it. Fuck, fuck, _fuck._ She was so wet it was a wonder that Opal hadn’t noticed. That she’d somehow managed to stay in that bed, not touching herself, when she was _this_ turned on. _How_ had she gotten this turned on?

It wasn’t personal, it was just her body’s natural reaction to those … to those fucking _sounds_ Opal had been making. Kuvira clamped a hand over her own mouth, trying not to make any noise herself. Kuvira’s fingers were fast, churning up hot friction against her clit, and she bit her palm against the sounds that were threatening to come out of her throat.

Opal’s moans. Opal’s breasts. The press of Opal’s groin against her thigh, up and down, that wet drag. Christ, Kuvira, for the first time in awhile, reached deep. Well, deep by her standards at any rate, fingers digging past her underwear, palm flat and waiting for her clit. And it was good, so good, and with the shameful thought of Opal Kuvira finished before she barely had a chance to start.

She threw her head back coming to the echoes of Opal’s voice, her high and breathy whimpers and her deep moans. Kuvira thrust herself down on her fingers, grinding hard, breath stuttering in her lungs as she felt the tension drain out of her body. Shit. She fucked down again, and bit her palm.

She looked at herself in the mirror again, how red she was, how messy her hair was. She _looked_ like she’d just fucking came. This was the second time she’d gotten off getting Opal off. This was bad. This was a _really_ bad idea. But even while she knew all that, Kuvira knew she wasn’t about to stop either. She washed her hands and headed back to their bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you couldn't guess, I wrote some of this chapter not long after watching Russian Doll. This modern AU is off the rails. But, it’s a really tight show with great dialogue and really earnest characters. If you want to watch good TV, I recommend it, just make sure you heed the trigger warnings as it deals with some pretty tough topics like mental illness/suicide/death.


	9. Chapter 9

They still hadn’t talked about it, but maybe Opal had rubbed off on Kuvira ( _hah_ ) enough because Kuvira kind of needed to talk about it to _someone_. Opal was disqualified, so Kuvira had gone over to Korra’s huge place, intent on having a good time to distract herself, but they’d ended up meal prepping for Korra’s week. Kuvira drank saké way too quickly and far too early in the day as she unloaded her entire past onto Korra.

“So, I had this massive crush on my foster mom, right? Like, I thought I was in love with her,” Kuvira explained. Conspiratorially, she added, “I don’t actually know if I’m capable of love but that’s— _that’s_ another story.” She finished off her bottle of saké and put it with the rest of Korra’s recyclables.

“You know I appreciate you sharing your past with me,” Korra said thoughtfully. “But it’s the middle of the day. You don’t have to do it while drunk.”

“Korra, no,” Kuvira said firmly, almost laughing as she went back to Korra’s liquor cabinet. “If I’m not drunk there’s no way I’d tell _anyone_ this.”

“Sounds healthy,” Korra observed.

“That’s me,” Kuvira trilled, plucking another bottle from Korra’s shelf and prying off the lid with Korra’s counter. “Paragon of mental, physical, and emotional health.” Korra plucked the bottle out of Kuvira’s hand with surprising dexterity.

“Drink a glass of water,” she ordered.

“Hey, _I’m_ the bartender here,” Kuvira argued, sensing that Korra was cutting her off after two bottles. Kuvira wasn’t even drunk, she was buzzed at _best_. She could still say all the words she had to say, and she certainly wasn’t going to let _Korra_ lecture her about—

“There’s juice in the fridge if you want that instead,” Korra replied. Kuvira grunted in annoyance but turned and helped herself. “Also, try the spring rolls.” She nudged a plate towards Kuvira. Kuvira felt an intense pang of gratitude.

“I’m sorry,” she offered, face hot. “For just … showing up, drinking your beer, and rambling about my childhood trauma.” Guiltily, she added, “I really _thought_ we were going to fuck.” Korra laughed.

“That’s fine,” she said. “Thanks for helping me meal prep.” Kuvira ate a spring roll.

“This is really good,” she offered.

“I know,” Korra smiled. “Anyway. You were talking about your foster mom.”

“Oh yeah,” Kuvira said, finishing off the spring roll, still eager to talk now that she had an excuse to and someone unattached that would listen. “I don’t know if you know, but Opal’s mom is really hot.”

“I’ve seen the magazines,” Korra shrugged. “Kinda had a weird crush on Lin when I first moved here. But only for two seconds.”

“Suyin,” Kuvira corrected.

“No, _Lin_ ,” Korra said. “Her _sister_. She’s Police Chief here. Badass scar. Still mad at Tenzin for marrying Pemma. Big scandal, years and years ago.” Kuvira didn’t know who any of these people were.

“I didn’t realize Suyin had a sister,” Kuvira mumbled because she really hadn’t. Suyin had never talked about her siblings, just her mother, Toph Beifong, sometimes.

“There’s not a ton of Beifongs running around,” Korra shrugged. “And Lin and Suyin don’t really get along from what I can gather.”

“Wait, how do you know the Police Chief?” Kuvira squinted.

“I’m kind of a big deal,” Korra grumbled, clearly embarrassed. “And I, uh, also had a … troubled youth.”

“ _Handcuffs_ , huh?” Kuvira leered. “Kinky.”

“I was _sixteen_ ,” Korra reminded Kuvira, patient but her smile was thin. She clearly wasn’t comfortable talking about her past self in that way. “It wasn’t like that.”

“Sorry,” Kuvira offered, clearing her throat. It _had_ been like that for Kuvira, but that didn’t mean that everyone was like her.

“I didn’t even know I could _like_ girls, back then,” Korra went on. “When I say ‘crush’, I mean that very loosely. Anyway, I was way more into Mako at the time.

“Ugh,” Kuvira complained. “Why you liked that guy I’ll never know.”

“Maybe I just like big bushy eyebrows,” Korra teased, nudging Kuvira’s shoulder. “Maybe _that’s_ my kink.” That didn’t make Kuvira feel better even slightly. “Anyway, stop changing the subject. Suyin.”

“Yeah,” Kuvira said, breathing out a sigh, suddenly exhausted. She ate another spring roll. “I just lived in that household for years, never felt like I was really part of that family, and increasingly starved for Suyin’s affection. And she couldn’t have given me the kind of affection I wanted anyway. But she treated me more like a friend than … her kid, which I think messed me up.”

“So, what I’m getting from this is that your foster mom didn’t really act like a mom,” Korra said. Kuvira felt like that was a fair assessment.

“She was kind of preparing me to be her successor someday,” Kuvira confessed. She’d never really talked to anyone about that. It hadn’t been official. Baatar was probably the only person other than Suyin who had ever discussed it with Kuvira.

“Oh!” Korra sounded surprised. “Not one of her kids? I mean, one of her biological kids?”

“I was a ward,” Kuvira said, deciding on the terminology. “And Suyin was kind of attached to the idea of Zaofu being run by women, but she didn’t want it to be a … monarchy, so to speak. Not that Opal was ever interested in leading. But Suyin was also a control freak so I guess I was kind of the perfect person for the job.”

“Did you feel kind of … groomed for the position?” Korra asked carefully, helping herself to a few spring rolls and pouring the two of them some juice.

Kuvira laughed at the terminology. “I was,” Kuvira said. “Suyin’s not—a bad person, but she’s definitely manipulative.”

“Would you have wanted that job?” Korra asked. Kuvira took a breath.

“I would’ve wanted anything Suyin wanted,” Kuvira mumbled miserably. She looked down at her hands. They were shaking a little. Stupid. “But after awhile I realized that I couldn’t be that person for her. Not her daughter, not her good little protégé, definitely not her friend. Not after I, uh, fucked her son and left Zaofu.”

“I mean,” Korra said softly. “You _were_ eighteen.”

“I know I was an idiot, Korra, you don’t need to tell me,” Kuvira grumbled, feeling a headache come on.

“No, I mean, you weren’t an idiot,” Korra said, dismayed. “You were just young.”

Kuvira laughed humourlessly. “I mean, that was also part of the problem,” Kuvira muttered. “I … it helped me realize that she was never going to feel the same way about me as I felt about her. And that also … made me realize how I felt about her. Which I’d somehow managed to ignore for years as it got … worse and worse.” The thought of telling Opal any of this made her stomach turn.

“Having a crush on your foster mom doesn’t make you a bad person,” Korra said softly.

“I don’t even know how much of a crush it was and how much it was me just—seeking validation in every single way,” Kuvira said. She sighed into her hands, stressed. “I was almost obsessed with her. But, even if I was a kid I still had the understanding that _if_ she returned my feelings it would be a _bad_ thing. I still wanted her though. I guess it also didn’t help that she didn’t really treat me like her child.”

“That sucks,” Korra said. Kuvira shook her head.

“Suyin gave me a better life,” she said. “But she never took me in because she wanted another child. She already had like—a ridiculous amount, you know Opal’s family.”

“Looking at Opal’s family photos makes me grateful to be an only child,” Korra agreed. Kuvira had never been in those photos.

“She took me in because she’s the guilty rich,” Kuvira explained, trying not to sound bitter. “She saw a poor, scared kid on the streets and ‘saw herself,’ you know, despite coming from a pretty affluent family.”

Kuvira chewed on her lip, feeling like she was being a bit unfair. She believed Suyin’s stories about how angry and confused she’d been at Kuvira’s age. “She wanted to give me the same opportunities that she’d been given so that I didn’t screw myself up.” Kuvira laughed sharply. _“Well,_ joke’s on you, Suyin.”

“So, wait. Were you actually her family?” Korra asked.

“She’d probably call it that,” Kuvira muttered, wrapping her arms around herself. “But, no. We really weren’t. Partially because, you know, I wasn’t actually her kid and I also had—have—no idea how to— _be_ a family member. It was pretty much an understanding that I was just living in their house until I aged out of the system.

“But, I fit in for awhile. I really did. I really was thankful for Suyin and I wanted to impress her. Probably to get attention and … love,” Kuvira concluded with a shaky breath. “But it was weird. I was stuck between wanting to be part of her family and also wanting to be respected by her on an equal level and it was actually easier for her to do the latter even if I _actually_ needed the former. You know?”

She’d hated the way Suyin had called Kuvira her daughter, and partially that was because she wanted her, but also that was because … Suyin really never had treated her as such. Maybe Kuvira always would’ve had feelings for Suyin but she couldn’t help but feel like if Suyin had treated her the way she’d treated Opal or Wing and Wei, or hell—even Baatar—Kuvira would’ve … Kuvira would not have done the things she’d done.

“I was a teenager,” she sighed. “Desperate for validation and a horny closeted kid, but I was fine. Then one day, everything just … I couldn’t continue to pretend to be well-adjusted anymore. I felt like Suyin was never going to welcome me into the family and I just— _wanted_ that. So, I fucked her son.” Kuvira pressed her knuckles to Korra’s counter, feeling it bite into her bones. She definitely felt drunk. “Does that even make sense?”

“I can’t imagine how that’s like,” Korra said, basically admitting that it didn’t make sense.

Korra knew vaguely that Kuvira had had one boyfriend, that he’d been Opal’s brother, and that Opal and Kuvira had lived together before. But putting all the puzzle pieces together made a pretty ugly and confusing picture. Kuvira couldn’t blame her.

“He felt like he wasn’t respected by his family either,” Kuvira said. “We kind of bonded over that. And it was so fucking …” Kuvira cut herself off, gritting her teeth. “One-part ‘I’m a Beifong now’, one-part ‘Gay? Never heard of her.’” Korra nodded sympathetically.

“And neither was true, and me just—having sex with her son only pushed Suyin further away from ever actually viewing me as her daughter. Which, I don’t even know if it’s what I wanted. I don’t even know now what I wanted from her, if I was genuinely in love with her, or just …” Kuvira couldn’t keep talking about this.

“Where was Opal in all this?” Korra asked after she realized Kuvira had trailed off.

“Off being healthy and sweet,” Kuvira said, voice hardly above a whisper. She cleared her throat. “Opal is the only thing about that time that I am _sure_ about. The only thing I’m willing to keep around from my past. She … we don’t talk about it. But I think she understands more about the situation then I’m probably comfortable with.”

“Maybe you should talk about this with her?” Korra suggested. “Not that I’m, not down to listen as well.” Kuvira laughed a little at Korra’s defensive addendum.

“I don’t know,” Kuvira said. “I kind of like putting up the front that I’m well-adjusted too.” Even if she was bad at it.

“Yeah, but Opal had a different childhood than you,” Korra said. “It makes sense that you’re not the picture of mental health. And even then, you’re not the same person. You don’t have to pretend to be who you’re not just to impress someone else.”

“I …” Kuvira trailed off. Was she again just pretending to be someone better, smarter, stronger to get validation? She knew Opal would care for her no matter what but … she’d also known the same was true for Suyin and she’d gone above and beyond for her. “It’s also _her_ family. I don’t want to have that weird conversation with her.” She and Opal had kind of maxed out on weird conversations anyhow.

“You said so yourself, she’s probably inferred most of it,” Korra pointed out. “You’d probably just clear up some misconceptions.” And Opal had some misconceptions that Kuvira had already helped with.

“I … You’re right,” Kuvira confessed. Korra didn’t say anything, only gently smiling, encouraging Kuvira to speak. “I’ll … talk to her eventually about it. It’s just—” She sighed. “I’ve been sleeping with her.”

Korra’s eyes widened. “Oh.”

“Not as a—She’s straight and your friend is bad in bed so I’m just teaching her the tools of the trade,” Kuvira said. She sounded like a creep. “And not teaching as in— _grooming_ or anything we’re just—it’s cool.” Wasn’t it?

“Kuvira, I don’t think Opal’s straight,” Korra said firmly.

“I—Okay, but she isn’t interested in me, and I’m not interested in her,” Kuvira replied, just as firmly.

“ _Fine_ , but you’re _sleeping_ with each other, apparently,” Korra said.

“But it’s like, how you and I sleep with each other. _We’re_ not going to fall in love or anything,” Kuvira said. Her eyes narrowed. Was Korra jealous? “Right?” she pressed, suddenly panicking.

Korra could not have rolled her eyes harder. “Clearly it’s _not_ the same thing. Even if you both are seeing other people.”

“But it’s—” Kuvira said, frustrated. “It’s not _weird_. I don’t feel—like there’s any deep, twisted meaning to it.”

“Like it’s not … traumatic?” Korra asked.

 _“Yeah,”_ Kuvira said, raising her head. “You’re right. It is different. It’s totally fucking different from anything I’ve ever experienced. I love her and she’s my friend so it’s obviously more personal than like—me and you, or me and Ginger—”

“Wait,” Korra said. “You and Ginger?”

Kuvira made a face. “There’s like a dozen lesbians in this city, of _course_ me and Ginger.”

“Oh,” Korra said, making a face. “That’s awkward.”

“What, you and Ginger?” Kuvira asked.

“No, Ginger and _Bolin,”_ Korra said. “He had a part in Varrick’s new mover, didn’t you know? They’re sort of dating.”

“Ugh, no and I don’t want to know,” Kuvira said. She was already one degree away in terms of sexual partners with him, what was another? “But even with all our history, it doesn’t feel like—how I felt when I slept with her brother. Or how I felt about Suyin. I don’t feel like—fucking _killing_ myself over it,” she laughed.

“So, it feels healthy?” Korra asked, bypassing Kuvira’s casual suicide talk. “Or at least—normal? Neutral?” Kuvira thought about it and nodded slowly.

“Yeah,” she said. “And I … don’t know why. Because it probably shouldn’t. Probably I shouldn’t be casually sleeping with my ex-foster sibling.”

“Kuvira, I think we’ve both come to the conclusion that you don’t really view your foster family as family,” Korra said.

“It’s still weird though, right?” Kuvira asked. “Not normal.”

“Being straight is ‘normal’,” Korra said, putting her hand on Kuvira’s. “If no one’s being hurt it doesn’t matter what’s normal, it matters what works.” Kuvira nodded. “It seems like you and Opal aren’t hurting or using each other which is—honestly the most abnormal thing to have in a relationship, given the state of the world.” She gave Kuvira a sad, earnest smile. “But you should still tell Opal what happened and how you feel.”

“Yeah,” Kuvira said, knowing that Korra was right. “Maybe I will.”

 _“‘And thanks for talking to me, Korra,_ ’” Korra said in a goofy voice. “Why _Kuvira_ , I’m _glad_ to help, it’s what _friends_ are for.” Kuvira laughed a little.

“Thanks.”


	10. Chapter 10

After hanging out with Korra, Kuvira had gone home for a two-hour drunken guilt-nap, waking up to Opal puttering around in the kitchen making dinner. Kuvira had sobered up, and the nap had actually helped her feel refreshed. Kuvira took a quick shower and brushed her teeth, entering the kitchen in time just for Opal to serve supper.

“So,” Kuvira offered conversationally, digging into the vegetable stir-fry Opal had made for the two of them. “I hear Bolin is in a mover with Ginger?”

“Yeah,” Opal said. “You knew that. It’s his Nuktuk movie.”

“Oh,” Kuvira said. She really hadn’t put two and two together. Not that Ginger had really talked about her work much. It struck Kuvira that Ginger didn’t really enjoy acting all that much, or at least not the roles she ended up getting.

“They’re dating now,” Opal said. “Kind of. They’re taking it slow and playing it up for the paparazzi, and I don’t know if she actually likes him, but. Yeah.” It surprised Kuvira to hear that Ginger and Bolin were dating, but the thought that Ginger didn’t like Bolin seemed to ring true. It was probably for publicity anyhow; she’d have to ask Ginger. _If_ Ginger would go out with her again; they hadn’t met up in over a month.

“Do they … know about you?” Kuvira realized. “The paparazzi, I mean?” Ginger knew how to be discrete, but Bolin was about as subtle as a wolfbat, and Kuvira couldn’t imagine him juggling two women without the media finding out.

“Oh, we broke up,” Opal said. She blinked at Kuvira, surprised. “Didn’t I tell you?” She hadn’t.

“You broke up with him?” Kuvira echoed.

“Well, you know how it is,” Opal said awkwardly. “We’re still friends.” Kuvira felt a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach.

“I … just came back from a date with Korra,” Kuvira said numbly, to remind Opal that while they were having sex, they weren’t exclusive.

“Where did you guys go?” Opal asked. She didn’t sound upset to hear it. Kuvira felt half-relieved half-confused. Opal seemed genuinely happy that Kuvira was dating another girl. That meant she hadn’t broken up with Bolin because she’d developed feelings for Kuvira. But Kuvira was no closer to understanding how Opal actually felt about her.

“Just to that new Southern Water Tribe restaurant she’s been talking about,” Kuvira lied. They _had_ gone to that restaurant recently, and it sounded better than _‘I drank her beer and cried about your mother’_. Opal nodded, flipping through her book.

“Was it good?” she asked. “Bolin’s been talking about it too.”

“Yeah, I liked it,” Kuvira said. She tried relaxing. “I kind of suspect she took me there to show me how it’s done properly.” Opal laughed.

Kuvira racked her brain for evidence that Opal had broken up with Bolin. Bolin had stopped hanging around so much, but that had been happening for awhile. Opal had been a little quiet, but hadn’t seemed sad, and she’d always had a smile ready for Kuvira.

“Are you alright?” Kuvira asked, looking Opal over. Opal shrugged.

“I’m a _little_ bummed, but I’ll be fine,” she admitted, voice slightly subdued. Kuvira felt a flash of irritation.

“You’re not doing this breakup thing properly,” she declared, and she would know, she’d been through enough of them. “Go to bed and pick a show; I’ll get us some chocolate and ice-cream.” Opal looked across at her, a small smile breaking across her face.

“There’s a vegan ice-cream in the freezer I haven’t tried yet,” she said shyly. Kuvira saluted her and headed to the kitchen.

<3

The vegan ice-cream was surprisingly good, and the two of them polished off the entire bucket, leaving two bowls on the bedside table and the bucket on the floor. Opal had put on some Brooklyn Nine-Nine episodes, and they forged their way through them even after they’d brushed their teeth, getting progressively sleepier.

Kuvira had wound up cuddling Opal from behind, one arm cast around Opal’s stomach, curled around her and watching the laptop on the bedside table over her shoulder. It felt nice to be that close to her, Opal feeling warm and relaxed in her arms. Once or twice, Kuvira dozed off and on, probably feeling even more comfortable than Opal about this.

At one point, Kuvira noticed Opal’s hands were wrapped lightly around her wrists, almost holding her hand. Kuvira stirred, shifting slightly to look at Opal who seemed to be silently gazing at her hands, not the laptop. Weird. “Opal,” she murmured into Opal’s ear. “What are you doing?”

“Thinking,” Opal replied enigmatically. Kuvira was still too sleepy to say anything snarky, but she made a mental note that she should. Opal pressed on, “I didn’t break up with Bolin because we were … sexually incompatible.” She sounded like she was trying to convince herself. They hadn’t talked about the specifics of _why_ Opal and Bolin had broken up yet.

Kuvira cleared her sleep-laden throat. “It wouldn’t be a bad thing if you had.”

“It wouldn’t?” Opal asked, voice high and thin in the darkness. Kuvira pulled closer to Opal in the night, lazy.

“You’re twenty, you’re still figuring out what kind of relationship you want. If it turns out that you want good sex, then you have the right to look for that in a relationship.” Opal frowned, considering Kuvira’s words. “And besides,” Kuvira added, “the way I see it if you were really invested in Bolin you wouldn’t have broken up with him for anything. Something else wasn’t working.”

Opal made a sound, not quite accepting or dismissing Kuvira’s observation. “But, you still get to look for sex if you want to.” Opal’s grip on her wrists tightened.

“Because! I mean I had my first orgasm when I was twenty years old! Twenty! I have a lot to catch up on!” she cried indignantly. Kuvira laughed. In her books, later was better than too early, and Kuvira had lost her virginity at an age that in retrospect was unhealthy for her, but she could tell that Opal wasn’t actually self-conscious about any of that.

“Ugh, I’m still pretty unhappy though,” Opal spoke up, pulling Kuvira away from her thoughts. “Breaking up sucks.”

“Agreed,” Kuvira murmured. “Anything else I can do?” This was easy, familiar. “Kale wraps for dinner tomorrow or something?” Opal made a face, then smiled.

“You know what would make me feel better,” she replied, all but waggling her eyebrows.

“ _Shit_ , Opal don’t you have another setting?” Kuvira burst out, feeling surprised.

Opal sat up in bed as Kuvira pulled away from her. “Please forget I asked that!” she blurted. “Kale wraps sound good!”

“I _just_ got back from Korra’s,” Kuvira huffed. Not that they were exclusive, but _still_.

“Please forget I said anything,” Opal replied, clearly embarrassed. Kuvira frowned. In all honesty, Korra and Kuvira were open but Kuvira had thought that she and Opal had moved … past … whatever they’d shared.

“No, no, it’s fine,” Kuvira sighed. “You’re just … so immature, actually.” Opal had been such a mature kid and now she was selfish and sex-obsessed like a teenager. Kuvira could feel Opal blushing in the dark.

“You’re not _that_ much older,” Opal mumbled, embarrassment turning to annoyance. Kuvira was only a year older than her but she’d never failed to lord it over Opal.

“Believe it or not, orgasms don’t fix everything,” Kuvira said, reaching over to run a hand through Opal’s hair.

“I think they _could_ help,” Opal argued. “But you’re right, it was definitely inappropriate for me to even—talk about that.” She turned away from Kuvira, awkward again. Kuvira sighed.

“Not really,” she allowed. Kuvira looked for Opal’s body in the dark, her form a little clearer from where the moonlight was sneaking past the crack in their curtains. “You want me to give you a blowjob?” she offered. She felt Opal turn around.

“You would?” Opal echoed. “ _Really_?” Kuvira shrugged.

“Just this once,” she said. “Because I feel bad for you.”

“Uh, should I shower?” Opal asked, nervous, excited, completely awake.

“You did shower,” Kuvira reminded her. She could still smell the scent Opal’s shampoo hanging thick in their bedroom.

“Oh yeah …” Opal laughed timidly. Kuvira wondered if it was just the only thing Opal could think to say when she felt like she was being pressured to act instead of think.

“Forget I said anything,” Kuvira said, pulling away.

“No!” Opal burst out. “No, I—I really appreciate it, Kuvira.” Kuvira chuckled a little at the formality of Opal’s statement. “But,” Opal said, and Kuvira’s ears perked up. “If you’re up to it, I’d really rather try to give _you_ a blowjob.”

“What?” Kuvira asked, cocking an eyebrow. She hadn’t seen this coming.

“Like, as a thank you. For, all of this. I kept letting you do all this nice stuff for me and you know, there’s only so many cupcakes I can bake before they start losing their market value,” Opal said. Kuvira had been wondering about the uptick in deserts Opal had been producing lately. “I can’t promise that I’d be very good right away, but I’m a fast learner and a hard worker.”

“This isn’t a job interview, Opal,” Kuvira said.

“Well, do I get the job?” Opal asked nervously.

Kuvira moved to lie down next to Opal, resting her head on the pillow next to her. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea,” she said. “I don’t usually … bottom.”

“You can sit on top of me if you like,” Opal said, shifting closer, unbearably polite. “That would work, right?” Kuvira laughed.

“What I mean is I usually take the lead in … in bed,” she murmured.

“Wait, so Korra doesn’t?” Opal asked, trailing off.

“She _does_ ,” Kuvira said. Or rather, Korra had offered, and had been cool with Kuvira saying no. Most women were, at least at first, until they started feeling guilty like Opal. Ginger, who was still dealing with dysphoria, kind of understood the aversion in her own way and while she usually offered, she never pressured. Hwei had probably had the most problems with it but it was still leagues different than Izumi.

Kuvira had gotten herself off enough times, and she and Korra had even grinded themselves to mutual ends before but. “I just … it’s just me. I’m just not as comfortable with it as I am giving pleasure.” If Kuvira wanted to be touched, she could touch herself. She didn’t know a lot about navigating around herself with others, but she could handle herself. In many ways, Opal had lucked out asking Kuvira of all people how to masturbate.

“Oh,” Opal said. “Is it … it’s not something I could help with, is it?” Kuvira honestly didn’t know. That brief talk with Korra had brought a lot of things back to the forefront of Kuvira’s mind.

“I couldn’t put that on you even if you could,” Kuvira settled on. Opal was quiet for some time, just watching Kuvira in the dark with her shining eyes. Somehow, Kuvira didn’t even feel self-conscious. She just stared back at Opal as they breathed quietly together.

“Is there any way I could make you feel good?” Opal asked.

“You’re the one that just broke up with their first boyfriend,” Kuvira said. “I appreciate it, Opal, but I … I don’t know if I’m comfortable with you doing anything to me. Especially after you just … maybe some other time.”

It’s not like she didn’t want it. It’d be a lie to say that when Kuvira touched herself lately that it wasn’t mostly Opal she thought of. Opal’s moans, her taste, her arms and chest and hipbones. Kuvira’s fingers, in Opal, the way she could unwrap her and put her back together. It’d be a lie to say that Kuvira hadn’t thought about Opal reciprocating. Hadn’t even fantasized about it when she was safely, and guiltily, alone in the bathroom, in her bed, one time on the couch. But not tonight, somehow.

The intensity of Opal’s gentle expression, the silence of the night. It somehow all added up together to a place where … Kuvira wasn’t even turned on. Even though she’d been offering to eat Opal out, and that’d probably have done her in, there was a different kind of mood in the air now.

Opal moved in then, her hand carding through Kuvira’s hair, pulling her into a hug. Kuvira stiffened momentarily, having not expected the movement, but when Opal settled in comfortably, she relaxed. She wrapped an arm around Opal, resting her palm on Opal’s shoulder.

“I love you, Kuvira,” Opal murmured into Kuvira’s neck. And Kuvira smiled.

“You too, Opal,” she whispered back. They fell asleep like that, Netflix buzzing in the background.


	11. Chapter 11

“You know, at the stage where someone buys a sex toy, that’s officially friends-with-benefits territory,” Kuvira mused a few days later, hanging out in the bedroom with Opal, as one did with platonic friends. “Are you sure you want to head there?”

Opal’s cursor hovered over the ‘purchase’ button as she pouted thoughtfully. “Well, I’d probably say that we were friends with benefits when we had phone sex that one time.” Kuvira sighed. There was only one occasion Opal could be referring to.

“You noticed I was masturbating too?” she asked.

“Kuvira, you’re _not_ a subtle person,” Opal said. Kuvira clicked her tongue against the back of her teeth. Damn it. “But that does make me feel kind of guilty. Technically I hadn’t told Bolin until after uh—I got you to … help me that one time. I didn’t even tell him when we broke up.”

“Well what were you going to say? ‘ _Bye, you can’t please this_ ’?” Kuvira asked, gesturing at her junk. Opal laughed a little, and Kuvira felt a flash of satisfaction. She smirked. “Maybe that’s what you should’ve said.”

“I don’t know. It just feels bad. I don’t think Bolin would’ve been jealous, either,” she said. “The whole point of non-monogamy is to be honest and since I didn’t tell him about that one instance, I guess I feel kind of guilty.”

“I’m glad you didn’t tell him,” Kuvira said. “I would’ve felt weird to have him thinking about us.”

“Bolin isn’t like that,” Opal said firmly. She sighed. “Do you think I should tell him that me having sex with someone else was why I broke up? I mean, I didn’t really give him a good reason, and even if it’ll sound like I fell in love with that person I was sleeping with and that’s not the whole truth, it might bring him some closure.” Kuvira didn’t know what the fuck Opal was talking about, but Opal nodded to herself. “I’ll tell him tomorrow at brunch.”

Kuvira wrinkled her nose. “You’re having brunch? You’re having brunch with your _ex?”_

“Brunch with _Korra,”_ Opal said. “Bolin’s her friend, and he’s still kind of my friend too.”

“Brunch sucks,” Kuvira said. “Just eat two meals.”

“This is why you’re never invited to brunch,” Opal said. Kuvira huffed, dissatisfied.

She couldn’t imagine being friends with any of her exes. Then again, Kuvira didn’t really have that many since most of the girls she saw were still casually available on occasion. However, thinking about having brunch with the older woman she’d gotten together with when she’d first moved to Republic City as a semi-idealistic baby gay or Baatar? Hard pass for both.

“So?” Opal asked, nudging her hipbone into Kuvira’s thigh. “What do you say. The blue one or the black one?”

Kuvira was going to tell Opal to log off of fucking Amazon.com and just head over to their neighbourhood sex shop next time she was buying groceries, but she bit. “It’s your toy, I don’t know why you need my input over colour.”

“I was hoping it’d be, you know, _our_ toy,” Opal said. “I don’t know a lot about sex toy hygiene but I’m pretty sure we could … you know?” Kuvira rolled her eyes.

“If you wanted to experiment with toys you could’ve just asked. I’ve got some,” Kuvira said.

“Seriously?” Opal asked.

“What can I say, I’m a slut,” Kuvira said, yawning. “I don’t really like toys but don’t let my opinion bias you.” Opal nodded.

“What kind do you have?” she asked, turning around to settle down by Kuvira’s face.

Kuvira groaned. “Scratch that. I’m not going to let you have sex with hand-me-down toys. And if you’re going to buy one, buy the black one.” Personally, she thought black was classy. While at the end of the day it didn’t matter what colour you were being fucked or fucking with, Kuvira appreciated her toys not looking like human flesh or artificial food colouring. “Black is the coolest colour.”

“But blue is the warmest,” Opal referenced.

“… Shut the fuck up,” Kuvira groaned.

“But if you have toys, maybe I can use them on you?” Opal suggested. Kuvira considered it. She had a vibrator, which she still sometimes used, but Opal was looking at dildos and strap-ons and that type of thing. Kuvira wasn’t big on penetration, mostly because of her exes, even while Opal clearly enjoyed it.

“There’s a box beneath the bed,” Kuvira said, not really engaging. Opal dropped to her knees on the floor, searching.

“I can’t believe I never bothered to check for any dirty secrets under here,” Opal said.

“There’s more dirt than secrets,” Kuvira said.

“Yep, lots of dust bunnies. But—” Opal agreed, sneezing a little for dramatic effect. “Not entirely fruitless.” She opened the box. “Wow, you’ve got quite the collection.” Kuvira squinted.

“There’s not _that_ much,” she said. It was just that her first girlfriend had been a gay Christian Grey and Kuvira had walked away with some loot.

“Well, you _are_ talking to me,” Opal said. “Not a huge frame of reference to draw from.” She curiously picked up a dildo and Kuvira snorted.

“Put that back,” she ordered lightly. “Korra gave it to me on my birthday last year. As a _joke_. A _bad_ one.” Opal waggled it teasingly before letting it drop back into the bin. She pulled out a strap-on next.

“Nice,” she said, eyes lighting up. “Want to try it out?”

“I want to throw it out, to be honest,” Kuvira said. “That was my asshole ex’s.” Opal pouted but handed it over to Kuvira who regarded it with apathy she was grateful for. Time had let her mostly heal from that relationship, even if shadows around Kuvira’s apartment sometimes left a bad taste in her mouth.

“How about this?” Opal asked, finally coming across the vibrator. “How do I turn this on?” She pressed buttons insistently. Kuvira smiled.

“I took the batteries out,” Kuvira said. Opal pouted.

“You don’t make this easy for me, do you?” she asked.

Kuvira stretched on the bed. “Well, if you want to try it out so bad you can wash it and reload the batteries, can’t you?”

“You don’t talk a lot about her. Your first girlfriend,” Opal noted. Kuvira sighed. It felt weird to even call Izumi her girlfriend, considering she’d barely been a girl anymore.

“There’s not a lot to say,” she said. “She was over forty”—around Suyin’s age— “I was barely eighteen. I was sending off signals to everyone and anyone that I was an isolated young lesbian and she took advantage of that. I was so happy to finally be dating a woman that I didn’t notice how controlling she could be.” Kuvira sighed.

“Anyway, she got me to do things I wasn’t comfortable with under the guise that she was ‘teaching’ me,” Suddenly Kuvira swore. “ _Shit_. I’m not doing that to you, right?”

“Kuvira, you’re a _year_ older than me,” Opal sulked. Then, more seriously, she added, “I’m more worried that I’m doing that to you.” What did _that_ mean? In the bathroom, Kuvira heard a buzzing noise. Opal had found some batteries, apparently.

“I don’t know,” Kuvira said, sinking back into the bed. “Whatever we have now, friends with benefits or whatever, it doesn’t make me feel used. And if you also feel okay, then great.”

Opal smiled. “I’m glad,” she said, emerging from the bathroom, drying the vibrator gingerly. “Is it alright if I ask if … she’s why you don’t like toys?”

“I’m fine with vibes,” Kuvira said. “But penetration in general, I’m just … TMI but she really pushed me to do stuff that I wasn’t comfortable with so yeah. I’m kind of … taking a hiatus from strap-ons and dildos and I don’t know—whatever the kids are fucking these days.”

“Would you be cool to wear one?” Opal asked.

“Opal,” Kuvira asked in a low voice, smirking. “Are you imagining me fucking you with a strap-on?”

“Well,” Opal said, blushing. “You don’t have to say it like _that.”_ Kuvira laughed.

“I wouldn’t be opposed to fucking you with a strap-on,” she allowed. “There are easier things for me to do, but whatever suits you.” In actuality, Kuvira figured wearing a strap-on was probably easier than going down on Opal but Kuvira suspected it wouldn’t be half as enjoyable. “Just, don’t buy your first sex toy online. I feel like if you’re going to be a pervert, you should at least be a pervert in person. I’ll come with you, even.”

“Yeah you will,” Opal said, and while Kuvira wasn’t looking at her she could practically hear Opal wink.

“When I invited you to live with me, I did _not_ sign up for bad puns,” Kuvira complained.

“Should’ve read the fine print,” Opal replied unsympathetically, sitting down on the bed next to Kuvira. “So,” she said, holding up the vibrator. “How does this work?” Something sad shifted in Kuvira’s chest.

“Are you _sure_ I’m not taking advantage of you, Opal?” Kuvira asked. To Kuvira it didn’t feel … off, it didn’t feel wrong, but Kuvira wasn’t the most impartial person. And she kept getting herself into shitty relationships, she couldn’t help but worry that she’d end up dragging Opal into one just from Kuvira’s damage alone.

“Our relationship is not the same as your first relationship,” Opal said firmly, immediately coming to the root of Kuvira’s worry. “You were vulnerable and isolated. I’m not. You were—just coming to terms with your sexuality. I’m not. You were—”

“Wait, what does that mean?” Kuvira asked. “Your sexuality? What is that? I’ve never asked.”

“Um,” Opal said. “Well I haven’t settled on the specifics yet, but I think I’m bi, too. I’m _clearly_ not straight.”

“You’re not?” Kuvira echoed.

“Kuvira, what do you think I’ve been doing the last few months?” Opal asked. “Hint: another girl.” She laughed a little at her own pun.

“Straight girls do weirder shit to lesbians all the time,” Kuvira said.

“Well now I feel like even more of a jerk,” Opal said, folding her arms. “You really got me off all those times, thinking I was a straight girl using you for my own sexual gratification?”

“I—” Kuvira said dumbly. Saying ‘yes’ seemed like the wrong move.

“Are you _sure_ you don’t feel used, Kuvira?” Opal asked, jaw dropping open. “Because that doesn’t sound like a good thing.” Her concern melted away to indignation. “Kuvira! I was shopping for _dildos_ with you and you thought I was a _heterosexual_?!”

Kuvira couldn’t help but burst out laughing. “Don’t laugh!” Opal insisted. “This isn’t good!”

Wiping away literal tears from the corner of her eye Kuvira said, “You know how I’m a pessimist that likes being pleasantly surprised?” Opal huffed.

“ _Seriously_ , Kuvira,” she said. “Next time some girl you think is straight wants you to ‘teach her how to masturbate’ just say ‘ _no_ ’. Seriously, have some self-preservation.” That hurt a little bit.

“You’re my friend,” Kuvira said, trying not to take it personally. “Even if you _were_ straight, I wouldn’t feel hurt right now.” Opal didn’t make any move to relax. “Besides, you were a pretty equal opportunity straight girl.”

“Damn right I would be,” Opal hissed fiercely. “But this seriously makes me feel worried. Like, I wouldn’t have held it against you if you’d said no. It’d be awkward, sure, but no more awkward than actually—having sex with each other. And it would be _my_ fault for bringing it up.”

“I know,” Kuvira said, flushing. “And I _do_ have self-preservation, Opal. I wouldn’t have agreed to this if I didn’t know you. If you were a straight stranger I wouldn’t have, not even if you were like—Serena Williams. Well, maybe if you were Serena. Okay, _definitely_ if you were Serena. But only then.”

“Okay, well, I want to make it clear that you have my enthusiastic consent too,” Opal said. “You’re not manipulating me or using me. That said, I don’t want you to feel like I’m just using you for orgasms.”

“I don’t feel like that,” Kuvira said. Opal frowned.

“But you literally thought that’s what I was doing,” she said.

“I didn’t mind,” Kuvira said. “Opal, it blows my mind, but I really do feel okay with everything that’s happened between us. But I do.” Opal still didn’t look happy. “More than okay,” Kuvira admitted.

She wasn’t about to tell Opal just how much she loved this, whatever this was, that was too risky. Just because Opal liked girls didn’t mean that she liked Kuvira, or that the two of them were a good idea, but she liked this.

“Well, that’s something,” Opal relaxed.

“So,” Kuvira tried cautiously. “Do you want me to fuck you or not?”

“Rain check?” Opal asked hopefully. Kuvira felt like shit.

“What, does trauma-talk ruin the mood?” she asked, trying to play it off like it was a joke.

“Kuvira,” Opal sighed, walking over to hug her, dildo bobbing humorously as she moved. “We have time, you know? I want you in my life for the rest of _my_ life.” That _did_ make Kuvira feel better. “We don’t need to rush into doing anything. Or not doing anything.” Kuvira just felt kind of weird that she and Opal hadn’t had sex since Bolin and Opal had broken up. She didn’t know if it was a good thing or not.

“Okay. Maybe you could you get some condoms for when we use this,” Kuvira suggested, looking at the dildo critically. “I don’t want to give you a yeast infection with this thing.”

“Oh,” Opal said. “I don’t … I actually don’t have any.”

“Wait, were you and Bolin having unprotected sex?” Kuvira burst out, ready to have a meltdown.

“No,” Opal called out. “It’s just—we didn’t, the stuff we did, he technically doesn’t need—”

Feeling a little gross, Kuvira cut her off. “Actually, I don’t want to know. And I have some condoms,” Kuvira grouched. “ _Me_. The woman who doesn’t like penetration. _I_ have condoms.” She nearly threw a pack at Opal to demonstrate, but instead she patiently set the packaging down again. Kuvira had gotten an STI once before and while she’d been able to treat it, she’d become a stickler for protection, not even _thinking_ about pregnancy.

“Kuvira, me and Bolin never did anything unsafe,” Opal said softly, sympathetically. She knew Kuvira was just worried. “But the stuff we did is between me and him, so you’ll just have to trust me when I say that.” Kuvira took in a slightly shaking breath.

“Okay,” she said. “But _really_ Opal. Protection. Even if you’re monogamous, protection is important.” And Opal hadn’t even been _that_ monogamous.

“I know,” Opal said. “I just don’t have condoms.” She frowned. “Are you sure you want to do this with me?”

“I’m fine,” Kuvira said. “Just concerned.” Maybe Opal was right to put having sex off. Kuvira was still clearly dealing with shit.

“Thank you,” Opal smiled, genuine and warm. “But it’s uh—not weird right?”

“Nah, I’ve done it,” Kuvira said.

“Good,” Opal said brightly. Then she leaned in to murmur in Kuvira’s ear. “Because I’m definitely going to cash that check.” Kuvira’s mouth dried and Opal all but skipped away with that revelation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Izumi I’m sorry to make you into an asshole but there are not enough canon older ladies and you don’t have a canon personality IIRC T_T.


	12. Chapter 12

Republic City in early winter was always a sight, streets almost blue with frost, crisp and icy in contrast to the heavy rains of Zaofu. The scenery was partly why Kuvira had agreed to accompany Opal grocery shopping. Zaofu had never quite had the climate for snow so winters here had been a sharp departure when Kuvira had first arrived, but she’d come to appreciate it. She still didn’t know how to dress for it.

“Are you cold?” Opal asked, bundled up tightly in her winter coat.

“Are you hot?” Kuvira shot back, because she _was_ cold, just wearing a sweater. Opal laughed.

“A little,” she said, edging closer to Kuvira. “Oh, whoops,” she said. “I was shoved into you. Let me warm you up.” She wrapped her arms around Kuvira’s shoulders.

“I guess I have no choice,” Kuvira replied sarcastically.

Opal grinned winningly. Then she was shoved into Kuvira for real, and they were pushed to the far wall of the train. Kuvira clenched her jaw, annoyed. Shit like this had never happened in Zaofu, the trains had been designed to comfortably accommodate large numbers of people and they’d never needed to. Republic City had the exact opposite problem.

Opal didn’t seem bothered though. She glanced around her to the people not paying attention, wrapped up in their own lives. Then, she leaned in closer to Kuvira, pressing her hipbones against the top of Kuvira’s thighs, smiling.

“Is your back cold?” she asked. The train car itself wasn’t that cold anymore thanks to the body heat of a dozen miserable humans, but Kuvira’s back was pressed against the window and there wasn’t enough space to move.

“Yeah,” Kuvira said honestly. Opal unzipped her coat and leaned in, tying the gigantic monstrosity around the both of them and leaning in to embrace Kuvira.

“Oh, you’re not going to give me your jacket?” Kuvira laughed. “Real gallant, Opal.”

“I’m cold too,” Opal responded petulantly. “And I figured this was the best solution.”

Kuvira nodded, acknowledging the compromise. She _was_ feeling warmer, and while it was obvious to anyone that she and Opal were hugging, they were still afforded some privacy by the gigantic winter jacket. Where Opal had gotten a coat this big, Kuvira couldn’t even begin to guess.

Opal finished zipping Kuvira up into her coat, the empty arms just hanging out uselessly by their sides, and she grinned up at Kuvira. Kuvira couldn’t help but smile a little. Opal looked so pleased with herself, and Kuvira did feel warmer trapped in an oversized coat with Opal.

Opal’s body was also a substantial source of body heat, warming Kuvira easily. If they weren’t on a train with a bunch of strangers, and if they weren’t still just friends, Kuvira would’ve kissed her. The thought made Kuvira balk a little, given how dangerous it was to think of Opal like that. Opal, who was so incredibly off-limits it was unbelievable.

But, Opal apparently had some similar ideas, nosing her face into the crook of Kuvira’s neck, and shifting her arms beneath their coat. The mischievous look in her eyes made Kuvira apprehensive.

“Opal,” Kuvira hissed in a monotone, as she felt Opal’s hands smooth themselves down Kuvira’s ribcage to rest on her hipbones. “What are you doing?”

Kuvira could feel Opal play with the zipper on her jeans teasingly. “Don’t worry about it.”

“I _do_ worry about it,” Kuvira mumbled as Opal took her hand.

But Opal just held her hand in her own, not doing anything more beyond warming Kuvira’s skin. The intimacy was too real. Opal was staring up at Kuvira quietly and Kuvira flushed when she met her friend’s gaze. Opal smiled cheekily and … literally wagged her eyebrows suggestively.

Kuvira successfully fought back the urge to roll her eyes. Instead she leaned in, voice low, and whispered in Opal’s ear, “We are _not_ doing anything on public transport.”

Predictably, Opal shivered, grinning. “I’m not doing anything,” she said, voice high-pitched and musical, so deceptively innocent. “Just thinking.”

“Oh, you’ve thought about it, hm?” Kuvira couldn’t help but ask, wrapping her spare arm around Opal to bring her closer, so that Opal could keep talking.

“I mean,” Opal said softly, almost insecure all of a sudden. The car swayed. “It _would_ be pretty sexy, right?” Kuvira felt a brand-new kind of discomfort creep into her gut. Opal hadn’t ever described their situation as something she found sexy before.

“Not for the rest of the passengers,” Kuvira replied, not sure what else to say.

“Oh, of course,” Opal whispered back. “I was just thinking.” Opal’s confession grew stale hanging in the small amount of air between them, Kuvira unsure of how to respond. They hovered in each other’s space for awhile, unable to move away from each other still. Not that Kuvira necessarily wanted to move away.

This was intimate in a way that surpassed friendship or even the sexual relationships Kuvira had. Opal had _just_ told her that she liked women, and now she was telling her about the fantasies she had on the train. It was kind of a lot all at once, and Kuvira couldn’t help but worry that the friendship and history Kuvira and Opal had could spiral a relationship like this out of control. But after a brief moment of deliberation, Kuvira decided she was overthinking things, and that Opal was right. It _would_ be pretty sexy.

Kuvira bit her lip and leaned into Opal’s space to ask against her ear, “Do you like that? Exhibitionism?” Opal stiffened across from Kuvira, not responding, maybe not understanding. “Doing something secret that no one knows about, but that they could find out?”

Kuvira hummed, considering. “Like, I wonder how you would feel if I fucked you against the window in our apartment,” she mused, escalating just a little. “Would you like that?” Opal didn’t respond but her fingers pulled tighter on Kuvira’s hand.

“No one else would see, unless they looked up, which they could, at any time,” Kuvira continued, feeling reckless. “And you know what they’d see?” Opal squeezed Kuvira’s hand, a kind of wordless reassurance that she wanted Kuvira to go on. Kuvira bit back a laugh. “You—pressed flat against the glass, and me behind you.”

“Kuvira,” Opal said breathlessly. Yeah, she was turned on. Kuvira pulled her in closer, so that she was resting her lips just above the crook of Opal’s jar, brushing against her earlobe.

“Yeah,” Kuvira said. “I bet you’d love that. Can you picture it?” Opal’s eyelids fluttered shut, and she leaned into Kuvira, focusing.

“I’m uh—thinking about it,” she squeaked. Kuvira couldn’t help but smirk. Opal was so much more manageable like this.

“I’ll tell you what _I’m_ thinking. I think you should get naked in the living room one of these days. Or maybe not,” Kuvira mused. “Maybe I’d fuck you in your underwear at first.” She grinned, this was fun. “Maybe in that stupid pink lace bra. Or maybe in a black one, just so it’d be super obvious if someone looked.” She heard Opal take in a breath.

Kuvira hummed, pulling Opal into something that resembled a hug, and Opal’s hands snapped around Kuvira’s waist, holding tight. “Yeah,” Kuvira went on. And I’d force you to stand up and take my fingers as you look down on passersby. Just my fingers, in and out, until you wouldn’t be able to stand it.” She corrected herself, “Until you wouldn’t be able to stand.”

Kuvira couldn’t lie that she hadn’t been thinking about it lately. Fucking Opal in every spare inch of the apartment, in bed, in the kitchen, hell—on the floor. Because this was sex, as ill-defined as the relationship surrounding it was. This was Opal, wanting Kuvira, wanting Kuvira to touch her, and with permission given Kuvira’s imagination had kind of gone into overdrive.

“ _Then_ I’d make you strip down,” she went on. “I’d make you, and you’d do it, because you’d _want_ to, wouldn’t you?” Opal was quiet for a moment, and then she registered Kuvira had asked her a question.

“Uh—maybe,” she said. Kuvira laughed into her shoulder. Opal wasn’t very good at this. Opal reached up to pinch her waist. “Go on!” she insisted. Kuvira grinned against her cheek and leaned in to speak into her ear, keeping her voice low.

“Do you know why I fuck you so much?” Kuvira asked. “And never ask for anything in return?” Opal’s breathing was heavy. Kuvira wanted to kiss her neck. “Because you look so damn good.” She leaned in, skimming her teeth against the smooth, tender skin of Opal’s neck.

“And the sounds you make— _Opal_. I could get off on just that.” Opal whimpered and Kuvira resisted the urge to smile. “Yeah,” Kuvira agreed softly. “Just like that.”

Opal was quiet for the rest of the ride, stock-still and clinging to Kuvira until the train pulled into their station and Opal quickly detangled them.

“Kuvira, I have to go to the bathroom,” Opal announced, holding on her hand, a desperate look in her eyes. Her face was flushed. Kuvira’s first instinct was that of ‘ _fuck_ no’, they would _not_ do this in a public washroom. But, the second thought, which won out, was that Kuvira really wanted to. It wouldn’t be the first time Kuvira’d bitten off more than she could chew.

“Follow me,” Kuvira said roughly, grabbing Opal’s hand and dragging her to the washrooms.

There was a single-stall washroom, which was a fucking godsend even though this definitely wasn’t its intended purpose. It wasn’t even that gross, but Kuvira could barely focus on that anyway. Opal locked the door behind them and Kuvira washed her hands thoroughly before turning around and shoving Opal against the door.

“Kuvira I’m—” Opal began, but then Kuvira unzipped her pants in one rough motion and tugged them down to her knees. Opal let out a loud moan as Kuvira palmed her crotch, pressing her underwear tight against Opal’s skin, and starting to move her hand back and forth rhythmically.

“Shh,” Kuvira chastised her, massaging her clit. “We don’t want anyone to hear, remember?”

Opal nodded, eyes unfocused. It wasn’t actually a problem, unless Opal started screaming no one would notice what they were doing, but Kuvira knew Opal’s reaction would be worth her playing the danger up a little.

She reached lower, feeling how wet Opal already was, and Kuvira almost made a noise herself thinking about how awkward it must’ve been for Opal to walk with her to the bathroom, so swollen and wet, probably throbbing with each movement. She hadn’t done this before, but she wanted to now, pressing her index and ring finger into the fabric, into Opal.

“I forgot to mention that I’d fuck you like this,” Kuvira said, digging her fingers into Opal’s underwear, deep, then deeper still, still just teasing. Opal made a noise like it was punched out of her, her hands scrambling to grip onto Kuvira’s arms.

“When I was talking about how I’d fuck you,” Kuvira clarified conversationally. She thrust in again and Opal’s hips rocked reflexively, trying to get more. “In your underwear. I wouldn’t take them off.” Thrust. “I’d fuck you just,” she moved and Opal gasped. “Like,” Opal shuddered, digging her forehead into Kuvira’s neck. “ _This_.”

Opal surged closer to Kuvira, wrapping her arms around her neck. She was having difficulties keeping upright, Kuvira could tell. “You okay to stand, Opal?” Kuvira teased.

“Kuvira _please_ ,” Opal said insistently. Kuvira grinned, stroking Opal as deep as she could, crooking her fingers inside, massaging. Opal’s breaths came high and fast, hands scrambling for purchase. Kuvira pulled her damp fingers free for a moment to let Opal catch her breath and re-establish her footing.

“Kuvira,” Opal choked out, like it was the only word she could think of.

“Maybe I’d help you,” Kuvira offered, always so generous, sinking to her knees on the floor. She put one hand on Opal’s waist, pinning her against the door as best she could, and returned her other hand to between Opal’s leg. Opal threw her head back, moaning, and Kuvira considered lecturing her but she liked this new game more.

She bent down and spoke the words into the fabric of Opal’s underwear. “Get my strap-on and give that to you, keep you upright with that.”

“Kuvira!” Opal yelped, grabbing at Kuvira’s hair, apparently done being teased. Kuvira grinned into her underwear, taking a quick inhale of Opal’s sweet scent.

Kuvira pressed her tongue against the soaked fabric and Opal moaned loudly. Kuvira loved the taste of her and wondered how over the past few months she hadn’t thought to do this. She’d probably just gone on autopilot for not wanting to fluid blond with someone who hadn’t been tested, but now she really wanted to.

“Bolin was clean, right?” Kuvira asked, reaching up to slide a finger alongside Opal, figuring that at this point she was still prepared to hunt down a dental dam or MacGyver a condom if he hadn’t been.

“What?” Opal squeaked out. “Why are you— _Oh!_ ” Kuvira started lightly suckling on Opal’s clit, Opal thighs shaking around her. “Do you want to—?” Kuvira paused for a moment to let Opal think, though she couldn’t keep herself from gently stroking Opal’s front, her underwear almost hot to touch and soaked through.

“We were both virgins, but we got tested at Planned Parenthood anyway before we did anything,” Opal babbled. “We made it a—ah _fuck,_ Kuvira—a date.” Kuvira could’ve laughed at how wholesome that was, but she felt a brief flash of satisfaction that Opal had made sure to get Bolin tested beforehand. Besides, she knew what she needed to know.

“I’m going to eat you out now,” Kuvira said in a low voice.

“Kuvira,” Opal moaned, shifting her hips closer. Kuvira lapped her tongue against the underwear, before taking a finger and pulling it to the side, revealing skin, needing to taste her without cotton in the way.

Kuvira glanced up at Opal’s face to gauge her reaction to how things were going, given that they’d never done this before. But Opal just moaned and canted her hips towards Kuvira again, wordlessly pleading. And Kuvira obliged, finally tasting Opal properly, and getting a moan in response.

Kuvira kind of had her mouth too full to dirty talk, but Opal clearly didn’t need it. She wanted this, tangling her fingers in Kuvira’s hair and rocking forward onto her tongue. And Kuvira had always enjoyed going down on her partners, when she enjoyed her partners— _not_ that she and Opal were partners.

Opal’s hands had suddenly reached down below Kuvira’s hair, to rest on her cheekbones and tilt her face up to look at Opal again. “Kuvira?” Opal asked, far too coherent in Kuvira’s opinion. Kuvira had probably gotten distracted, internally panicking from how she’d gone to fretting about holding hands with Opal to eating her out.

Kuvira elected not to respond, refocusing her efforts to what she _should_ have been thinking about to begin with. She slid a finger into Opal’s vagina, just to tease the prospect as she lapped at Opal’s clit. Opal made a strange, high-pitched noise at that. Kuvira dragged her tongue along Opal’s clit again before pulling off.

“Opal,” Kuvira admonished, leaning in again to quickly suck on Opal’s clit, eliciting another squeak. “We’re in public, remember?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll be quiet, but _Kuvira,_ if you don’t keep—” Opal responded, already coming up with threats to keep Kuvira working. Kuvira grinned, and thrust her finger in deeper, turning it around to crook it towards her as she resumed her work on Opal’s clit.

Opal let out another loud sound, and then clasped one of her hands over her mouths, eyes shut tight in concentration as Kuvira worked her over, tongue going from her clit to diving in as deep as she could along with her finger, slid to the hilt inside Opal.

While Kuvira had told Opal to be quiet, she kept her ears primed for any sounds that’d indicate that Opal enjoyed anything more than anything else. And while Kuvira had told Opal to be quiet, Opal was not, and it sounded like she enjoyed pretty much anything.

She’d cocked her hips up to meet Kuvira’s mouth, unconsciously trying to chase Kuvira’s tongue when she moved. Kuvira took pity, pressing in to lathe her tongue on Opal’s clit, adding another finger to stimulate Opal’s clit from both angles. Opal let out a choked moan, legs buckling. She was already very close. Dirty talk was a weakness for her apparently, but Kuvira guessed she couldn’t be surprised, given how they’d started this whole thing.

She focused on Opal’s clit, abandoning it only to lick up some of the arousal flooding over her fingers, pulling out all the tricks she could think to do with her tongue just for Opal who didn’t seem nearly as oversensitive for Kuvira’s tongue as she was for her fingers. Dragging her tongue across Opal’s clit, coupled to a specifically timed thrust of Kuvira’s hand, and Opal’s legs nearly gave out around her, her moan choked out behind a fist.

Kuvira removed her fingers and clapped a damp hand onto Opal’s thigh, helping her stand up straight, and she dove in between Opal’s legs, lapping and licking at her as Opal’s thighs trembled around her, sounds rising in pitch and volume despite Opal’s best efforts, and then Opal was coming, thighs almost clamping down on Kuvira’s face.

Kuvira coaxed her through the orgasm, tongue gentler now, hands lightly holding Opal’s sides, until Opal twisted her lower half away, still panting heavily behind the hand she’d thrown in front of her mouth. Kuvira resisted the urge to press a quick kiss to her thigh, but still she ran her hands up and down Opal’s flank comfortingly.

“ _Fuck_ ,” Opal gasped emphatically when she finally collected herself enough to open her eyes. She looked at Kuvira like she was seeing her for the first time. “That was … holy shit! I’m pretty sure this underwear is ruined!” Kuvira laughed. She helped Opal with her pants, getting to her feet as well. The ache in her knees were well worth it.

“I take it you enjoyed that,” she said, but she realized that she sounded kind of shy and quiet. Opal shoved her a little and Kuvira laughed, feeling better.

“I’m not done with you yet, though,” Opal declared loudly, zipping up her coat and fixing her bag, looking determined. “We’re not done!”

“We still have to get groceries,” Kuvira pointed out, amused. Opal looked conflicted, but still horny. “I mean,” Kuvira said, unable to help herself, “ _I’ve_ already eaten. So … if you’re fine …” Opal swatted her arm but then just as quickly grabbed it, pulling open the door.

“We still have food at home!” she declared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kuvira washed both her hands for 20 seconds as recommended by the CDC. Be like Kuvira.


	13. Chapter 13

Hands shaking with impatience, Opal managed to jam the key in the lock and open the door, all but barrelling inside. The moment Kuvira had passed through the doorway, Opal had closed the door, pulling all the locks shut, and then dumped her stuff on the floor. Kuvira leisurely set her bag on the ground, smirking at Opal’s hastiness. But whatever cockiness Kuvira was experiencing dried up as Opal started undoing her shirt.

“Opal,” Kuvira started, throat dry, helplessly combing Opal’s body as Opal revealed more and more skin, stepping out of here pants and standing in just her underwear and her pale green bralette.

“Can you—” Opal determined, stepping forward, bouncing up into Kuvira’s space and pressing her against the wall beside her. “Would you, right now—or are you—”

“Yes,” Kuvira mumbled, not even knowing what Opal wanted from her but wanting it just as much. “Whatever.” She put her hands on Opal’s hips, tracing up her sides to her ribs and chest, so tempted to take off Opal’s bra. “What do you want?”

“You made a certain promise about fucking me with a strap-on,” Opal said plainly, her hands reaching to cover Kuvira’s, bringing her hands over Opal’s breasts. Kuvira could feel the point of Opal’s nipples beneath her palms and—while this was not something that friends did—without thinking Kuvira began to massage her palms against Opal’s chest.

“Yeah?” Kuvira asked, glancing down Opal’s body.

“Ahhh—” Opal sighed, shutting her eyes and pushing her breasts up into Kuvira’s waiting grasp. Kuvira was going to live her entire life after this never forgetting how Opal looked like at that moment. “Yes. If you want to. Please, _please_ Kuvira.” Kuvira moved her hands off of Opal’s chest and, with what little strength she had, she clumsily picked Opal off the ground and carried her to the bedroom.

Opal laughed, wrapping her arms around Kuvira’s shoulders and her legs around Kuvira’s waist, only letting go when Kuvira tipped her onto the bed behind her. Opal scooted backwards, stripping off her underwear and kicking her panties to the floor. Seeing Opal like that, Kuvira just wanted to eat her out again. So she did.

She stripped off her pants and underwear and sank to the floor, pulling Opal forward, licking her, still wet and swollen. “Oh Kuvira,” Opal sighed again. Kuvira glanced up at her, seeing Opal play with her breasts and Kuvira just snapped. She genuinely didn’t think she could handle another minute without touching herself.

She threw a hand between her legs, licking and kissing Opal, as she started fucking herself. She was desperate, more desperate than she’d ever been around Opal, but she was too far gone to care. She tried her best to keep focused on Opal, but all that did was make her work herself harder, faster.

Pressure kept building in her gut until she couldn’t do anything more than touch herself, leaning her cheek onto Opal’s thigh as she fucked herself. Opal’s hands had reached down, playing with her hair, which also felt incredible. Kuvira finished in seconds with a noise that sounded like a sob.

“Holy shit,” Kuvira huffed out, dragging her fingers out of herself. Opal kept running her hand through Kuvira’s hair.

“Better?” she asked, and Kuvira could hear an actual _smirk_ in her voice.

“Fuck,” Kuvira whined, still feeling aftershocks from her orgasm. Things were rarely that intense. Opal sat up properly, scooting forward and letting Kuvira rest in her lap. “I’ll—I’ll grab the dildo and whatever, just give me a second.”

Opal laughed. “Take your time. And honestly you don’t have to.” She raised an eyebrow. “I uh—want it, but I don’t need it as much as uh—you clearly did.” Kuvira felt a flash of competitiveness.

“Oh?” she asked, getting to her feet. Opal watched her rise, leaning back on the bed, licking her lips unconsciously. Kuvira stripped off her shirt, then her bra, standing totally naked in front of Opal. Which was a stupid idea, but Opal certainly didn’t seem to mind. “Grab a condom.”

Opal reached over to the dresser and Kuvira reached beneath the bed, finding the toy and the harness. She stepped into the harness, and tightened the straps, fitting the dildo into place and making sure it was well-attached. She’d washed it, but she still felt more comfortable wearing a condom over it.

Opal handed her the condom and Kuvira slid it onto the dildo’s length as Opal watched. It had been a few months since Kuvira had done this, but not enough to make Kuvira worried she was out of practice. It had been much longer since Kuvira had used _this_ toy, most girls that liked to be topped had their own toys. It was always something to adapt to but strapping on this harness wasn’t new.

“I uh, what position should I get in?” Opal asked, nervous but obviously excited. Kuvira smirked.

“Whatever way you like it,” she said. Kuvira was better at this when the woman she was with was facing away from her, and Ginger preferred that along with face-to-face, while Korra liked being on top riding her while messily making out. Kuvira was pretty confident she could put on a good show in any position.

Opal leaned back on the bed, spreading her legs, basic missionary style. Kuvira, playing her part, climbed on top of Opal, looking her over. She reached over Opal to the bedside dresser, finding her lube. Izumi had sort of introduced Kuvira to the world of lube, and that had perhaps been the best advice she’d given her. Opal probably didn’t need it but still, Kuvira slicked up the toy, knowing it literally couldn’t hurt.

Opal was watching the proceedings with curious eyes, one hand absently holdings one of her breasts. “Let me know if you need more,” Kuvira instructed, leaning down to get closer to Opal. She didn’t want this to be uncomfortable at any point.

“Oh, I don’t think you have to worry about that,” Opal mumbled. Kuvira snorted, and leaned down closer, trying to position herself optimally.

“Hi,” Opal said breathlessly, looking up at Kuvira with bright eyes, flushed cheeks.

“Hey,” Kuvira replied.

Carefully, she reached down between Opal’s legs, slipping a finger inside, then two. Opal was still soaking. She crooked her fingers inside Opal and Opal shifted, shivering, looking down between them. Briefly, Kuvira wondered if Bolin had ever touched Opal like this, or if he’d skipped right to jamming himself inside of her.

“You sure you want this?” Kuvira asked.

Opal looked up at her distractedly, running her tongue along her lips. She nodded, spreading her legs wider. Kuvira nodded, putting one hand on Opal’s hip, helping guide her movements. Carefully, she slid inside.

“Ohh,” Opal moaned. She sounded satisfied. She shifted in bed, wrapping her arms around Kuvira’s back, looping beneath her arms.

“How’s that?” Kuvira asked, moving in deeper until she couldn’t get any closer.

“Mmh,” Opal hummed. There was a little smile on her lips. “I like being this close.” Truth be told, Kuvira liked it too.

“I don’t need a toy to be this close to you,” Kuvira reminded her. She could easily reach down and touch Opal instead.

“Then why don’t you?” Opal asked. Kuvira turned her face away. She didn’t know how to answer that. So, she didn’t.

“It’s not too big, is it?” Kuvira asked instead, pushing some of Opal’s bangs behind her ear.

“Woww,” Opal complained. “ _Really_?” Kuvira couldn’t help but laugh at her tone. Still, when Kuvira shifted slightly Opal’s thighs tensed on either side of her. The toy was larger than Kuvira’s fingers, that was sure, if not by a ludicrous amount.

“Just asking,” Kuvira snorted.

Kuvira started moving in and out of Opal, pulling out just enough to nearly slip out of her, before thrusting right back in, feeling as much as seeing Opal shudder and twitch in response. This was like dance, in some ways, the way movement flowed through her body, though it was more repetitive. Kuvira didn’t mind the repetition all that much, given that it seemed like she was repeating something that made Opal look like this.

“How are you feeling?” Kuvira asked. She wondered if she should reach down and touch Opal’s clit, in the event that penetration alone was not going to do it for her.

Opal took in a peaceful breath through her nose, shutting her eyes and most likely just focusing on the sensation. So close, and with Opal not looking, Kuvira could really take stock of her. She was aroused, blushing and sweating, but peaceful somehow. Maybe she was imagining Kuvira was someone else.

“It’s not the same as when you’re the one touching me,” Opal confessed into Kuvira’s shoulder, with a gentle note of minor discontent. Kuvira was surprised by Opal’s observation, though she didn’t let it distract her movements. “I mean … I really like your hands.” Kuvira couldn’t help but feel flattered about that, somehow.

“No,” she agreed, picking up her pace a little to a delighted grunt from Opal. “But I don’t come with a vibration setting.” And she was pretty sure this toy did.

“It’s already better than Bolin,” Opal allowed. Kuvira groaned, and a little vindictively thrust deeper into her.

“ _Please_ don’t talk about your ex while you’re in bed with me,” Kuvira begged, even though, while she wasn’t surprised, hearing that she was better than Bolin did make her feel pleased. Opal laughed.

“I don’t know, I say a lot of silly things,” she said, opening her eyes to grin at Kuvira wickedly. Kuvira thrust again and Opal let out a high-pitched grunt, going on, “You know when I—ah—when I don’t have other things to—”

“Don’t worry, Opal,” Kuvira assured her. “You’re going to get fucked.” Opal moaned again, just at her words, and Kuvira grinned. Dirty talk. She thrust as deep and hard into Opal as she could, her pubic bone grinding against Opal’s clit with the movement and Opal moaned out louder.

“You’re going to get fucked so good, you’re not even going to remember your name much less Bolin’s,” Kuvira said, maybe exaggerating a little.

Opal laughed. “I don’t know about that,” she said, reaching up to card her fingers through Kuvira’s hair, pulling a little in a way that made Kuvira want to touch herself again. “I only have the one.” Kuvira grabbed Opal’s hips, making her co-operate with the movement so that Kuvira wasn’t the only one doing any work.

“Okay, this feels good,” Opal moaned, reaching down to play with her own breasts. She really was pretty.

To distract herself, Kuvira moved down to Opal’s neck, pressing kisses on it, licking, biting, whatever, as she continued to thrust inside Opal. Opal was as loud as she pleased to be in their apartment, throwing her head back, reaching down between the two of them to massage her own clit.

Opal was already getting close to coming. Kuvira knew all her tells by now, the way the muscles in her hips steadily grew more and more taut, the sounds she’d make, even the look on her face all added up to something better. Kuvira thrust herself deeply, solidly, into Opal, as she continued to kiss her neck, licking and biting just light enough to leave no obvious marks.

“Ah, fuck, oh fuck—fuck me, _Kuvira_ ,” Opal moaned out, voice chipping with each thrust. Kuvira grinned and obeyed, sucking on Opal’s pulse, and kissing up her jaw.

This is one thing you didn’t get to do when you went down on someone—kiss them, and call Kuvira sentimental but she liked it. It was intimate as hell to be right down there, giving someone pure pleasure, but this was still different. And Opal’s mouth, slack and almost drooling, was just there, inches away from Kuvira’s lips, had Kuvira naturally leaning in, feeling warm and excited.

Luckily, when Opal came, she threw her head back and Kuvira was left with her mouth pressed to her pulse. Kuvira moved away slightly, even that was too intimate, especially since Opal was coming and essentially ending the interaction. Kuvira cleared her throat and kept subtly thrusting in and out of Opal until Opal’s legs clamped tight around her waist, stilling her.

Opal let out a loud sigh after a few moments of recovery. “We need to go grocery shopping more often,” she declared blissfully. Kuvira tried not to notice that her hands were shaking next to Opal’s head.

“Wow,” Opal mused, not noticing Kuvira’s internal panic. She threaded her fingers together on Kuvira’s back, gentling running her thumbs against Kuvira’s skin. “I don’t even know what to say. Thank you?” Thankfully, she let Kuvira go, stretching languidly beneath her. Kuvira sat up slowly.

“You know,” Opal said, almost conversationally. “I know the last few times we did this, you left the room to masturbate when you weren’t like …” she smiled, “totally driven mad with lust. And uh. You don’t have to. I’m just saying. If you want to.” Kuvira had been aching for the past while but she found herself unable to even consider touching herself.

“I’m good,” she lied, climbing off of Opal and undoing the strap-on with trembling fingers.

“Kuvira,” Opal asked, eyes wide with concern. “Is everything alright?”

“Yeah,” Kuvira squeezed out. “Of course.” They’d just almost kissed. After grocery shopping. She laughed breathlessly. “We need food in the house, though.”

“Wait, Kuvira, you’re not mad, right?” Opal asked, alarm ringing clear in her voice.

“I’m _fine_ , Opal,” Kuvira said, playing it off like they were still talking about Kuvira’s orgasm. “Just hungry.”

“Okay,” Opal said uncertainly. “You just …” she trailed off, unsatisfied.

“I’ll order in,” Kuvira offered, not wanting to set Opal off into being even more cloying. Sure, they were friends but. They needed to keep this stuff separate. Kuvira needed to get out of the apartment, but knew she couldn’t without making Opal think something was wrong. “But first, I’m going to shower.” Opal nodded.

“ _I’ll_ order in,” she offered. Kuvira forced a smile. At this rate she was lucky Opal didn’t decide they were on close enough terms to share a shower.

“Kuvira, we’re still friends, right?” Opal asked nervously. Kuvira took a deep breath, relaxing. Opal didn’t want things to change either. They were friends.

“Yeah,” she said, feeling herself able to smile genuinely. “Of course we are. Get me something with meat in it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey yall. I found out that I'd neglected to post TWO drawings with these two on my Opal/Kuvira blog so if you're interested give them (and the other art) a look :)  
> https://kuvopal.tumblr.com/tagged/opira+art


	14. Chapter 14

Recklessly, Kuvira had found herself flirting with Hwei one night. Giddy and stupid and questioning her about the new dance recital she and her troupe were going to perform in the coming week. And Hwei was in a good mood too, offering Kuvira free tickets, laughing at her dumb jokes, and glowing under the attention even when Zaheer rolled his eyes seeing the two of them flirting instead of working.

When they had dated, it hadn’t been for long. They’d seen each other for as long as it had taken Hwei to realize that she wanted to give up the dating apps and settle down with Kuvira, and equally as long for Kuvira to be honest that she just couldn’t do that. In Kuvira’s defense, Hwei was one of the first people she’d dated after Izumi, and Kuvira had still been figuring out how to do that. In many ways, she still was.

But it had been natural, in a sense, and almost unavoidable given that they’d met at work and both tended to be flirtatious and playful. Even now, it was easy to talk with Hwei, though that ease on Kuvira’s part could be at least partially attributed to the fact that Kuvira had been drinking more than usual, even and _especially_ at work. But she was fine.

After the last idiot had stumbled out, and long after anyone else working at the Red Lotus had left, Kuvira and Hwei wrapped up for the night together. Or rather, Hwei swept up some shattered glass while Kuvira leant against the doorway, smoking into the cold winter night.

“I thought you didn’t smoke anymore,” Hwei spoke up, though she didn’t sound as though she was passing any judgement.

“I don’t,” Kuvira said, letting the smoke curl out of her mouth, mixing with the fog of her breath in the cold night. She been craving nicotine, or something, lately and had managed to bum a cigarette off Ming-Hua when she’d dropped by. She was remembering why she’d ever kept the habit for so long.

Zaofu was one of those ‘don’t smoke within three meters of any building’ states, though many of its older citizens smoked. Kuvira hadn’t started until she’d moved to Republic City, and it had taken her a year after quitting Izumi to quit smoking too. Kuvira didn’t think Opal knew she’d _ever_ smoked. She could imagine what Opal would say if she saw Kuvira now.

“I look sexy,” Kuvira declared, feeling just drunk enough to confidently say her thoughts out loud.

“Well, you wouldn’t taste sexy,” Hwei remarked, joking, but she’d hated Kuvira smoking when they were dating.

“Hm, think about tasting me a lot, do you?” Kuvira teased, stubbing out her cigarette beneath her heel and turning back into the bar.

“Shut up,” Hwei laughed, though an obvious heat rose to her cheeks at Kuvira’s words. It was almost compulsive on Kuvira’s part, to keep pushing for Hwei’s attention, but Hwei at least seemed to enjoy herself. Kuvira took a chance before she could check herself.

She asked, words tumbling out of her mouth clumsy and impulsive, “Hey, why did we ever break up?” She knew why.

“Maybe because you couldn’t commit to a relationship,” Hwei replied with some hesitation, but she looked up at Kuvira with a mischievous glint in her eyes, like they were still joking. Like it didn’t matter that much.

“Maybe,” Kuvira said quietly, suddenly feeling subdued and gutted, with that sudden lurch in emotion that only drunk people could feel. “Maybe I’ve changed.” Hwei laughed, but she looked interested, just as teasing and flirty as before.

“And uh—what about you and the girl you’re living with?” she asked, tucking her hair behind her ear, carrying herself as gracefully as ever. “Opals, right?” Kuvira stiffened.

Hwei’s eyes opened wide as she realized. “You’re _lying_ to me,” she murmured.

“I,” Kuvira started. “Hwei, Opal and I aren’t together.”

“It doesn’t really matter if you are!” Hwei said, suddenly angry with Kuvira, cutting through the pleasant buzz of alcohol and nicotine that Kuvira had cultivated. Hwei was pissed. “But you’re not about to commit to me. _Are_ you?” Kuvira flinched. She was a pretty good liar when she wanted to be, but she didn’t have the energy or focus for it now. “Kuvira, you’re such a bitch,” Hwei declared at Kuvira’s silence, sounding hurt.

She paced away from Kuvira, taking the shattered glass to the backroom and putting space between them. The sound of her heels on the dance floor rang loud and decisive without the sound of music and people to fill up the place.

Kuvira looked down at her hands.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, and she really was, feeling cold and alone.

Hwei stepped out of the kitchen, mouth pressed into a thin line. “You …” she started. She laughed briefly. “You _know_ I still like you, don’t you?” Kuvira had suspected, and Hwei had done little this night to dissuade her.

“I still like you,” Kuvira offered, mouth dry, knowing that it wouldn’t help, wouldn’t make Hwei less angry or hurt.

“Maybe,” Hwei scowled. “But there’s no point because you’re still not going to commit. Not to me. And I really … I deserve someone who’s going to commit to me.”

“You _do_ ,” Kuvira agreed earnestly, guilt bubbling up in her chest.

“But it’s not you, and you’re such—an _asshole_ for throwing that at me,” Hwei said, voice shaking a little. Shit. Kuvira was such a fuck up.

“I … I really do like you, Hwei,” Kuvira said, trying to at least be honest. “I swear I didn’t know I was …” trying to use Hwei to escape her own bullshit. “I didn’t … I’m drunk.” Fuck that was _worse_. “I’m _so_ sorry.”

Hwei shrugged, her eyes lit up with both pain and humour. “That really doesn’t help me,” she said, shrugging uselessly. “It still stings.” Kuvira hung her head.

“I,” she said weakly, feeling tipsy and a little nauseous. “I can make it up to you.”

“You really can’t,” Hwei said firmly. “What you _can_ do is leave me alone and stop sending me mixed messages.” She took a breath. “And you know what, it’s fine. I’ll be _fine_ , Kuvira. You’re not that special. At the end of the day, the real tragedy is that _you’ve_ never changed.”

She nodded to herself. “I’ll get over you,” she declared, even smiling. “The real question is, will _you_ get over you?” And then she turned around, going to the backroom to grab her stuff and leave, leaving Kuvira frozen in place.

<3

“I don’t think I want to be a literature major,” Opal admitted over dinner preparations. She was nursing a stir-fry, leaping away when the oil splattered, while singing along to the radio. And complaining, evidently.

They’d stopped … fucking so constantly. It had been kind of hectic for awhile there … almost like a honeymoon of sorts. Even Kuvira had enjoyed it so much that she hadn’t been able to stop herself. But the way she’d almost kissed Opal had thrown a damper on the affair. She was fine kissing Ginger, Korra, Zhu Li … though she also hadn’t in awhile. She’d gotten so caught up with work and … and _Opal_ , that she’d let everything else slip.

And she couldn’t kiss Opal the way she could kiss them. Between the clandestine state of Ginger and Kuvira’s affairs, and the way Kuvira’s other girlfriends were explicitly polyamorous and happy with casual relationships, Kuvira could _afford_ to kiss them. But Opal, who’d never been in a relationship outside of Bolin, who loved Kuvira and could easily fall for her, or worse yet was someone Kuvira could possibly fall for, if hormones and neurotransmitters had their way … kissing Opal was out of the question.

But they’d almost stopped talking since that night. This was probably their first moment truly alone since then, and while Kuvira hadn’t been sure if Opal had noticed, now she was beginning to be certain of it. Opal was still, almost tense, waiting on Kuvira’s reply, and Kuvira remembered that she’d been asked a question.

“Then don’t be a literature major,” she eventually advised.

If Opal noticed Kuvira’s hesitation, she didn’t remark on it, shoulders relaxing slightly. “I’m almost three years into my degree, technically,” Opal pouted, moving her hips to the music in a way Kuvira idly, if reluctantly, kept her eye on. “It would really suck to drop out now.”

“Yeah, but what use is a degree that you’re not going to use? Don’t waste your money.”

Opal hunched her shoulders over on the counter by Kuvira, tilting the magazine Kuvira had been holding but not reading away so that she could shove her face into Kuvira’s space. She was pretty.

“I’ve already wasted money,” Opal pouted. “I might as well have the degree to show for it.” Then again, it wasn’t her money.

“Don’t make the mistake of … investing your time in something that’s just making you miserable,” Kuvira grumbled, folding up the magazine, and trying not to blush. “It’s better to move onto the next part of your life.”

“Is that what you did?” Opal asked, in a way that could either be sly or genuinely curious, dancing away from Kuvira and back to the stove.

Kuvira hadn’t expected that question. But she knew Opal wasn’t being accusatory. She was just asking, maybe even not knowing how loaded that question was. “Eventually,” Kuvira replied, guarded.

Opal let out a sigh, turning down the heat and stirring the vegetables. “I’ll think about it,” she decided.

It was nice to have a normal conversation with Opal after all that had happened recently. Kuvira hated to admit how _intense_ had been for awhile. Her worries could probably begin and end with the fact that she’d gotten so into it that she’d masturbated in front of Opal, something she’d always avoided doing. Not that Opal minded, but it was a line Kuvira had always tried to preserve, not cross.

They still hadn’t talked about this—about what this was—which Kuvira was just fine with but she did feel like if she wanted to keep this as something strictly casual, just between friends, masturbating in front of Opal was not something Kuvira could do. _Kissing_ was not something Kuvira could do. Not that Opal knew about that.

And Kuvira loved kissing, so there was no wonder there for why she’d have that urge to lean in and kiss her friend when they were together like that, even if it _was_ Opal and thus a terrible idea. Kuvira just felt like she was losing her grip on the situation, touching herself, moving in to kiss Opal, like she was on a train rapidly drifting off its tracks. Her getting drunk and flirting with Hwei, that had obviously been her way of trying to get some semblance of control. To at least fall apart on her own terms.

“Maybe I could be a chef,” Opal announced. It shook Kuvira out of her thoughts, the laugh it startled out of her warming her up easily.

“A chef?” she asked. Opal gave a quick, serious nod in affirmation. “And what would be on the menu?” Kuvira teased. “Microwave ramen?”

“ _Vegan_ microwave ramen,” Opal shot back, giving Kuvira a grin. “And this.” She gestured to the pan full of vegetables. And took out some chopsticks, helping herself to the food straight from the pan.

“You’re not going to plate it?” Kuvira frowned, elbows on the counter. “Surely presentation must matter, Chef Beifong.”

“Mm!” Opal said, slurping up her dinner, still dancing a little to the music. “It’s worth a little effort.” Kuvira rolled her eyes and got out of her chair, walking around the counter into the kitchen where she also grabbed some chopsticks, helping herself to Opal’s meal. To Opal’s credit, the sauce did taste really good.

After they’d eaten, Opal still was in a playful mood. “C’mon, Kuvira,” she said, smiling cutely. She held out her hand gallantly for Kuvira. “Dance with me.”

“You can’t dance,” Kuvira reminded her. Opal laughed and waved her hand for Kuvira. She looked very beautiful just then, Kuvira’s apron haphazardly thrown over Opal’s flowing green dress, her hair curling over her shoulders, and the look on her face. She looked happy. Kuvira took her hand.

Opal really _couldn’t_ dance. Opal’s handle on rhythm was nothing easy or instinctual, but rather something she’d clearly had to learn over time. Still, Opal was relaxed and calm, unfurling comfortably in Kuvira’s space, and Kuvira couldn’t help but reach out to meet her.

The music on the radio switched to something slower, and instinctively Kuvira pulled Opal in closer, letting Opal lean closely against her and leaning her chin lightly against Opal’s head. Opal’s eyelids fluttered shut and she let out a contented sigh, swaying slowly against Kuvira. She smelled like the food she’d prepared, but also sweet beneath it all. Every time Kuvira felt afraid of what this was, Opal was there to make her calm.

Kuvira didn’t really know how Opal felt about her. If she was attracted to Kuvira, or just interested enough to have sex with her. And Kuvira admittedly was kind of afraid of either answer. But, it was nice to dance with Opal. And Kuvira knew that Opal, who had seen Kuvira at her worst, was not bound to scare easily from whatever Kuvira wanted or needed from her.

“I think I want to try,” Kuvira admitted.

“Dancing again?” Opal asked, leaning back a little to look into Kuvira’s eyes, beaming.

“No, I mean,” Kuvira said. “You … touching me. If you want to,” she rushed to add. Opal looked surprised.

“Do _you_ want me to?” she asked.

Kuvira had to admit that she was more nervous than turned on at the thought. “I want to try,” she repeated.

“Because we don’t have to,” Opal said. “Ever. If you’re not comfortable.”

“Listen, if you don’t want to—” Kuvira started up.

“Kuvira I _want_ to,” Opal interrupted, a little annoyed almost, running her hand up Kuvira’s arm comfortingly but in a way that made Kuvira tense both in anticipation and apprehension. “I just don’t want you to feel like you have to. _Because_ of what I want.” Her eyes were wide and earnest. Kuvira nodded slowly, understanding.

“I just reserve the rights to tap out if I have to,” she said.

“You always do,” Opal promised with a small thoughtful smile spreading across her lips. “Okay. Let’s try.”


	15. Chapter 15

“Opal, I think I’m—” Kuvira muttered, cutting herself off.

Opal was interested, and had been, and had never trespassed across Kuvira’s one specific very loud boundary. And Kuvira couldn’t even know if Opal would be interested in doing so now.

“What’s up?” Opal asked, just casual and irreverent enough to put Kuvira at ease.

“Ugh,” Kuvira admitted. “This is stupid.” She should be more chill with other people messing with her junk, but it had just been so long Kuvira probably had psyched herself out even more about it.

“It really isn’t,” Opal said, pinching Kuvira’s hip teasingly. “And it’s been a long time coming anyway. I mean, I _should_ try to get you off for a change. You know?” Kuvira had been the only one ever putting up a barrier on that front, but Kuvira knew Opal hadn’t meant it like she’d been waiting for Kuvira to wear down and offer it up.

“We’re not,” Kuvira tried. “We’re not dating though. This doesn’t have to be reciprocal.” Even if they were dating there was no reason that it would have to be mutual … but they weren’t.

“No,” Opal agreed, and the ease with which Opal she did kind of made Kuvira’s chest feel like there was something hollow and aching in it, when it should have made her relieved. “But you know me. Equality. I never like to owe someone a favour. Or … like fifty, in our case. How do you want to do this?”

Kuvira sighed, leaning back on their bed, and Opal followed, cuddling up close. The truth was she didn’t really want to, but she knew if she said it Opal would be back off and Kuvira didn’t really want that either.

“I don’t know,” Kuvira admitted. “It’s been …” she considered it, “wow, almost two years.” She hated that Izumi had messed her up that much. The combination of Bataar and the quick follow up of Izumi had been a one-two punch for Kuvira’s love life. “I want to get over it.”

“Uh,” Opal said. “Pretty sure that’s, uh … I’m not a therapist, Kuvira. I can’t necessarily help with that.”

“Nah,” Kuvira agreed. She knew Opal couldn’t fix her. “But you know how to fuck now. So.” She spread her legs, raising an eyebrow, feeling a little bit more under control. Opal looked skeptical but she reached down and bypassed all manners of foreplay.

Kuvira bit back a noise. Opal was inside her. Which, fair, it was obvious that Kuvira liked penetration, even if it was only when she was the one doing it. She’d wanted Opal to do it, wanted to jump over that hurdle. It was still strange, though, and a bit too soon. But in Opal’s defense, it wasn’t like Opal had any real idea of how to do this.

“Are you alright?” Opal asked, her free hand reaching up to grip Kuvira’s shoulder comfortingly, in contrast to her clumsiness from before. “Too much?”

“It’s okay,” Kuvira promised her, reaching up to grab at Opal’s hand and changing her mind at the last moment, clenching it into a fist instead. It just felt weird to have something in her that wasn’t— _her_ , that wasn’t under her control, though Kuvira knew Opal would not do anything without running it past Kuvira first.

“Is it alright if I move?” Opal asked, case in point. Kuvira nodded. Opal shifted her hand, eyes focused on Kuvira’s face. Clearly Kuvira wasn’t very relaxed. “Maybe, if I sit behind you and it looks like you,” Opal suggested. Maybe. Maybe that could help. Kuvira nodded. “Also lube.”

“Okay,” Kuvira repeated. Opal shifted to sit behind Kuvira, opening her legs so that Kuvira could lean back. “Can you even see over me?”

“You’re not _that_ much taller,” Opal grouched, moving away to fumble around the bedside drawer. Her snippiness made Kuvira relax slightly. This was fine.

The lube made a squelching sound. Kuvira couldn’t help but laugh. “Sexy,” she said. Opal beamed back at her.

“Hell yeah,” she said. “Prepare to be seduced.” Opal got behind Kuvira, wrapping her free arm around Kuvira’s ribs, pulling her close, and leaning her chin against the muscle that bridged Kuvira’s shoulder and neck. It was a secure hold, and incredibly intimate. She reached down towards Kuvira’s crotch.

Rather than enter her immediately again, Opal opted for subtlety. She pressed her cold, wet fingers to the Kuvira’s stomach, hands becoming warmer as she gently, well, essentially massaged lube onto Kuvira’s skin. It was supposed to be comforting, Kuvira guessed, but it just made her antsy.

“Opal, do you need help finding the clitoris?” she asked, a little snappishly.

“Oh shush,” Opal said softly, leaning in close to press an unexpected kiss to Kuvira’s neck. Kuvira took in a quick breath, and Opal’s hand slipped lower, moving to lightly press her fingers around Kuvira’s clit, gently circling it.

Truth be told, this felt better. Opal’s fingers were still a little cold, but they were slick and sure, dipping into Kuvira teasingly before slipping right back out again to circle her clit. And Opal had started entertaining herself with Kuvira’s neck, kissing her way from Kuvira’s shoulder to the corner of her jaw.

Steadily, she slipped two fingers into Kuvira again, running her tongue along Kuvira’s neck, and picked up her previous ministrations. The pads of her fingers pressed firmly, insistently, to the part inside Kuvira that they both knew felt good while her palm ground teasingly on her clit. Kuvira took in a quick breath. She somehow hadn’t expected that it would actually feel good.

“How’s that?” Opal asked softly, her voice buzzing against Kuvira’s ear.

“I don’t know if I’m going to come from this,” Kuvira replied, and she was surprised to hear how quiet her voice was. Because, sure, this didn’t feel like the worst thing in the world but she really didn’t know if she could finish from it.

“I won’t take it personally,” Opal teased, kissing Kuvira’s skin again. And there it was again, her lips, pressing soft open-mouthed kisses onto Kuvira’s neck. She was probably doing it to make Kuvira relax and well, it was working.

Kuvira remembered how once Opal had said she didn’t need practice kissing, and stunningly Kuvira was coming to agree with that because it felt _good_ , especially when Opal used her tongue, licking and leaving small bites, making Kuvira’s chest feel light as Opal touched her.

But then she started sucking lightly on Kuvira’s skin, and Kuvira realized she could leave a mark. Kuvira shrugged her shoulder, because suddenly Opal’s touches didn’t feel as good. It was too intimate. Kuvira’s mind couldn’t decide whether it was too invasive or too fucking gentle. Either way, it was too much.

She tapped Opal’s arm and Opal stilled her motions and, after a moment, pulled out entirely. Kuvira’s vagina clenched reflexively around nothing in a way that made Kuvira feel strange. “What’s up?” Opal asked. Kuvira’s throat was thick with emotion.

“Maybe you can eat me out?” she asked, one last ditch effort. She didn’t think she was going to be able to come from just penetration, but maybe, maybe if it wasn’t penetrative.

“Are you sure about that?” Opal asked softly, clearly not buying it. “I mean, I’ve never done that before. I can’t imagine I’d be better.” Even if it was Opal, even if it was pretty much the person Kuvira trusted most in the world, Kuvira was still uncomfortable with being touched. There was a chance that being eaten out would feel different, or at least take Opal away from the sensitive skin on Kuvira’s neck.

Kuvira spread her legs wider instead of answering, looking at Opal expectantly. Opal pressed another quick kiss to Kuvira’s shoulder, but moved, settling at the foot of the bed instead. Immediately Kuvira felt freer. Opal crouched between Kuvira’s legs was much better, giving Kuvira a little more space, making her feel less smothered.

Opal settled down on the bed, a little bit cramped and curled up to get on the same level, but she smiled up at Kuvira sweetly. Then she pressed a kiss to the inside of Kuvira’s thigh, closer and closer, unbearably gentle and slow. She slowly ran her tongue along Kuvira’s clit, then down to her vagina.

Opal’s cheeks were flushed as she pressed in closer, and she looked up at Kuvira as she experimentally thrust her tongue inside of her, pulling out to run the flat of it against Kuvira’s clit. Kuvira’s childhood friend, looking at her like that as she ate her out, like she was enjoying every moment of it, blushing and turned on and hungry. Kuvira’s heart rate was too high.

“Just give me a moment,” she interrupted, begging, inching her legs closed. Carefully, Opal withdrew herself, but she still hung close in Kuvira’s space, looking at her softly. Kuvira closed her eyes to not watch Opal judge her. Kuvira still felt turned on, but her arousal was rapidly melting away and being replaced by panic, and sharp disappointment.

Izumi had been such a sharp departure from Baatar. Kuvira didn’t like thinking about him, and especially not that night. Or rather, that day. They’d had sex in his bedroom in the afternoon. They’d pulled down the blinds but even then, it’d been fairly bright in the room, no place to hide. His awkward hands, fumbling, trying to—Kuvira didn’t even know what he’d been trying to do.

Kuvira didn’t even know if he’d found it comfortable, much less sexy, and she certainly hadn’t found it to be either of those things. He’d finished though, marking the end of the experience. And Kuvira had had barely enough focus to pick herself up off the bed and literally throw up in the bathroom afterwards, stressed out and shaky.

She fortunately didn’t remember too much about that day, it was mostly just a haze now. Just his cloying fingers, uncertain. Like he knew he shouldn’t have been touching her, even though she’d asked him to.

Izumi had been the complete opposite. She’d gone into her relationship with Kuvira already knowing everything there was to know. She’d begun things between them already knowing exactly how Kuvira needed to be touched to feel good. And she made Kuvira feel good, at first. She’d sort of showed Kuvira the ropes, and that made Kuvira feel so awkward about her relationship with Opal.

The one thing she could console herself with is that none of what had happened between her and Opal had been her idea, whereas Izumi was always the one who pushed for more. Kuvira had come to Izumi when she was young, moved in with her, and that had kind of been taken as a blanket statement that Izumi could try whatever she wanted. And she did. And Kuvira had let her.

That’s what Kuvira hated about it the most. That she’d pushed Baatar into having sex with her. That she’d rolled out the red carpet for Izumi to destroy her boundaries. Like Kuvira had invited that pain and trauma onto herself. Baatar was a little freer from blame than Izumi was but, but Kuvira couldn’t help but feel like she was the common denominator.

Izumi tried little things at first, things that Kuvira found fun, and then, she’d started pushing a little further. And when Kuvira tried to figure out limits, Izumi would make Kuvira like a stupid child for wanting them. But, eventually Kuvira became more trouble than she was worth apparently, and she moved out and they hadn’t spoken since. Izumi had tried briefly a month or so after she’d dumped Kuvira to woo her back but fortunately Kuvira had had the wherewithal to not respond.

Things with the girls Kuvira dated now were different. Kuvira got to initiate things, and it was only their boundaries anyone had to worry about. Because Kuvira’s one boundary was simple. Don’t touch her. And Kuvira got to have all the intimacy and pride and joy of sex, without having to risk … without having to risk much of anything. And maybe it wasn’t the best way to go about it, but it was working for her. Or it had been. Until she thought about changing things.

“You know I don’t mind, right?” Opal asked, gentle as always, putting her hand on Kuvira’s thigh in an attempt to be comforting.

 _“I_ mind!” Kuvira yelled, frustration suddenly boiling over. She jerked away from Opal, sitting up and curling her arms around her knees. “Christ, why can’t I just be— _okay_?”

“You don’t have to be anything,” Opal murmured, and she sounded totally heartbroken. That was worse, somehow. Kuvira didn’t want her pity. “We can work around this.” Opal reached around to put her hand on Kuvira’s back. “We can do what we did before, you touch yourself after or during having sex with me, or we can both masturbate, there are _so_ many ways we can be with each other.”

Kuvira took a heavy gulp. “‘Be with each other’,” she echoed. Opal’s hand stilled.

“Or not,” she stumbled. “If you don’t want to have sex you don’t have to.” What the hell had they done to this relationship?

“And if I _did_ want to have sex,” Kuvira said coldly, turning around to look at Opal. “How long do you think the two of us could keep that up?”

“I,” Opal said, leaning on the defensive. “What do you mean?”

“We’re not together, Opal,” Kuvira said. “We’re fucking, and if I can’t do that, what _are_ we?”

“We’re,” Opal tried, taking her hand back and putting it in her lap. “We’re friends.”

“Yeah, it’s been _super_ platonic,” Kuvira said ruthlessly. “If I wanted to keep fucking you, where would that take us?” Opal’s mouth hung open, stunned by Kuvira’s tone. “Say you meet another guy, or go back to Bolin, or even—you find yourself a cute girlfriend. Do we keep this up? Would they like that? Would _you_?”

“I don’t think I could date someone else and have sex with you,” Opal admitted honestly. Well, that was something that got them closer to a definition.

“Why?” Kuvira asked.

“You mean more than that to me!” Opal balked. That was one of the things Kuvira had been worried about. “I’m not just going to— _use_ you to get off.” But that’s what Opal had been doing. And maybe that’s why Opal had tried to return the favour, out of guilt and a feeling of fairness, but Kuvira didn’t want it. Or really, she couldn’t do it. She just couldn’t.

There were two ways they could go from here—either they could put an end to what they were doing, or they would never stop. They would keep seeing each other, keep fucking, and Kuvira would get more and more wrapped up into Opal’s life until she couldn’t leave. That was the way relationships with sex went—they either ended or they didn’t, and Kuvira wasn’t ready to date anyone, much less Opal.

“What about me, then?” Kuvira asked. “And the other women I’m seeing?” Which, if Kuvira was honest, she hadn’t really had sex or even kissed anyone since she and Opal had … had really started doing whatever the fuck they were doing. It wasn’t on purpose, things had just turned out that way.

“Obviously you can see them,” Opal said. “I’d never stop you.”

“And you’d be fine with that,” Kuvira said skeptically. “Forever.”

“I don’t,” Opal started. She looked uncertain, and pained, just like Kuvira suspected she would. Kuvira felt like she was pinching mottled skin to prove that it was bruised.

“It wouldn’t be fair for me to expect you to stop, just because I—” Opal cut herself off. Kuvira felt her eyebrows raise of her head with the shock of what Opal was implying, like it was something alien and far away.

“Just because you—?” Kuvira prompted, stuck between being desperate for and terrified of the end of that sentence.

Opal’s face fell into something stressed and dissatisfied. She shook her head, evidently not up to answering Kuvira’s question. “I don’t think we should argue— _talk_ about this,” Opal spoke up, cutting through Kuvira’s thoughts. “Right now. We should have dinner and sleep on it and talk about it tomorrow.”

She was doing her best to not imply that Kuvira was an overemotional wreck—which she was so she didn’t know why Opal was trying to protect her from that truth. Still, she understood where Opal was coming from. And she didn’t really want to have this discussion right now either, not when her hands were trembling at her sides.

“Alright,” she agreed, sitting back.

She could feel Opal’s hand, tentative and gentle, run its way down Kuvira’s back in an attempt to soothe her but all it did was make Kuvira want to pull away. “I’m going to grab some water and go to bed,” she said softly. “Do you want anything?” Kuvira wanted a lot of things that she wasn’t equipped to ever have.

“I’m good,” she said. Opal nodded like she didn’t believe her.


	16. Chapter 16

When Kuvira woke in the morning, she found that Opal was gone and left a note in her place.

_‘Sorry! Forgot my shift this morning! You can call me at work, or I’m off at 3:30 and we can talk then! Let’s get a late lunch at Kwong’s Cuisine, I’ll pay. I swear I didn’t ditch you! Sorry Sorry!’_

Kuvira swept it off the table and tossed it in the recycling.

She knew Opal hadn’t done this on purpose, put a pin in their argument and left Kuvira along with her thoughts. Opal _loved_ healthy communication. Still, Kuvira couldn’t help but feel abandoned and cold, waking up alone. She didn’t have work today, but with nothing else to do but fret and wait on Opal, Kuvira decided to head for the bar anyway.

The place was still in the process of opening up and preparing for the rest of the day. They served lunch to hipsters during the day some weekdays, and Kuvira knew Hwei would be in for the day, if for no other reason than the process of elimination. When Kuvira arrived at the Red Lotus, there were no other patrons, and Hwei seemed bored cleaning up the place.

When Hwei looked up she seemed surprised, and eager for distraction, leaving her cleaning rag on the counter as she turned to look at Kuvira. “You’re not working today,” she observed. She squinted at Kuvira. “Are you?”

“No, but I need a drink,” Kuvira announced, trying to wear a convincing smile, and just now realizing how thin it felt. Hwei looked at her, a little bemused.

“A bit early for that, isn’t it?”

“Hwei,” Kuvira requested, realizing she wasn’t far from begging, pulling up a stool at the counter and planting herself in front of Hwei. Hwei pulled a face.

“Are we celebrating something?” she asked. Kuvira moved to reply but when she opened her mouth she couldn’t find the words. “Kuvira?” Hwei prompted, looking concerned.

“No,” Kuvira said at last. “I just … need a drink. And I don’t want to drink alone.” To drink alone felt like admitting some sort of failure.

“Alright,” Hwei said, still skeptical but seeming to decide that Kuvira was alright, or at least at a baseline level of drama that Hwei was comfortable with. She made Kuvira her preferred drink. As she slid it across the counter to Kuvira, she raised her eyebrow at her. “Are you asking me to play bartender slash therapist for you?”

“I don’t do therapy,” Kuvira said reflexively, taking a sip of the drink. It wasn’t as strong as Kuvira would’ve made it, but the hint of burning down her throat was still somewhat gratifying.

“Yeah,” Hwei snorted. “No shit.”

Hwei was being surprisingly kind after that disaster of a night. They’d been cordial coworkers, but again it wasn’t long before Kuvira was crumbling apart again. Honestly, Kuvira realized she’d been hoping to dump all her problems onto Zaheer, given that she honestly didn’t have that many friends. But he wasn’t here, so obviously Kuvira had to use Hwei instead.

“What is wrong with me?” Kuvira asked, rubbing palms against her eyes, battling the tension that was building up in her forehead. In the corner of Kuvira’s vision, Hwei made a face, considering her.

“I could write you a list,” she offered, keeping things blunt and honest, “but that’d be a waste of paper.”

“I need to break up with Opal,” Kuvira said. “The girl I’m living with.” Hwei had been remarkably perceptive about Kuvira and Opal, but then maybe Hwei had just been paying attention on the off chance that Kuvira would actually ever be able to settle down. “We’re not together but we need to break up.”

“Do you want me to change your mind?” Hwei asked rhetorically.

“I’m just letting you know you were right,” Kuvira said. “I _am_ a bitch.”

Hwei sighed. “If you’re going to break up with her, break up with her,” she said. “But I’m cutting you off.” Kuvira wanted to argue but knew there was no point.

“I can’t break up with her,” she explained, feeling more miserable than she had any right to. “She’s my best friend.”

“The fact that she’s your best friend is why you want to,” Hwei replied. Kuvira thought it was more complicated than that but Hwei was correct in the broad strokes.

“Fuck,” Kuvira muttered emphatically, burying her head in her hands. Then she sat up. “Fuck it. I have to get this over with.” She finished her drink and pushed it over to Hwei’s side of the bar, walking out.

“Kuvira,” Hwei called out. Kuvira hesitated just a moment, because Hwei had always had good advice, even if Kuvira could never take it. “I love seeing an ex suffer as much as anyone but I’m not a sadist. You should talk to her.”

Kuvira waved Hwei off because that was the thing, wasn’t it? Kuvira was a slave to entropy, constantly crumbling, and if anyone tried to be part of her life on a non-superficial level, they’d crumble too. Feeling like she’d done Hwei something of a favour by leaving, and like she’d do Opal one as well, Kuvira made her way to the city to kill time waiting for Opal to finish her shift.

<3

Kuvira had eventually gotten herself a table at Kwong’s, seated outside waiting for Opal. When Opal caught sight of her she’d almost elegantly hopped over the hip-height wrought iron fence to sit across from Kuvira. She was still dressed in her work clothes and not passing the dress code of Kwong’s in the slightest. Opal received some weird looks she remained oblivious to, but fortunately for her rich people were too snooty to make a fuss.

“Can we talk?” Opal asked, swiftly cutting through pleasantries, setting down her bags and stripping out of her uniform to her casual clothes underneath.

“Yeah,” Kuvira muttered, figuring that it had been overdue. She reached over and grabbed her glass of water, letting the condensation wrinkle her fingers and the cold bite at her skin.

“Should we order?” Opal asked. Kuvira shrugged. She didn’t want to have whatever kind of conversation they were going to have, but she also didn’t feel up to extending this interaction for longer than it had to be.

It didn’t matter. Within a minute of Opal sitting down, a waiter had come over, confirmed their reservation and taken their order. Kuvira, anxious to the point of nausea, had just elected for whatever Opal had ordered, some sort of salad dish. But, with the waiter gone, they were alone together once more, and Opal’s eyes were wide and earnest and hard to look at.

“I just wanted to say,” Opal spoke up into their awkward silence. “What happened last night … you don’t have to get over what your ex did in one night.” She reached across the table like she wanted to hold Kuvira’s hand but Kuvira didn’t take the bait. Opal looked at her with pity. “Or ever.”

Opal frowned to herself. “I was, arrogant to think that I could help,” she decided. Kuvira took a drink of her water and focused on not letting her hands shake. She’d wanted Opal to fix things too.

“And there’s nothing wrong with you for not being comfortable with people touching you,” Opal went on. “It’s not something that you have to overcome or fix.” Kuvira wanted to, though. She still felt like an idiot for not being able to trust Opal, _Opal of all people,_ to not hurt her.

But it wasn’t even like Kuvira had mistrusted Opal. Sure, she was uncomfortable with Opal touching her. Opal was clearly uncomfortable with it too, unused to touching another person that way, barely used to touching herself that way. It wasn’t so much, Kuvira realized, that she was afraid Opal would push past some hidden boundary Kuvira had set up. She was afraid of other things.

“We don’t have to ever do that again,” Opal concluded.

“Well, we won’t,” Kuvira said. Opal blinked, evidently a little surprised with Kuvira’s certainty, but she nodded.

“I also wanted to define our relationship,” Opal added. Fuck. Of course. “We’ve been kind of putting that off.” The waiter came by then, delivering their salads, and Kuvira took the opportunity to feel like she’d rather be anywhere else. The waiter gave Opal a second look, eying her outfit, but apparently decided to let her be.

“All this time that we’ve been spending together,” Opal went on when the waiter had rounded the corner. “I’ve come to realize a couple of things.” Kuvira felt too nervous and sick to even interrupt with a joke.

“Yeah?” she prompted, impatient. Opal’s head tilted to the side, squinting at Kuvira with a sad, perplexed expression.

“I’m not asking for us to change anything,” she said. “But I …” And Kuvira knew Opal was about to address the thing that had been worrying Kuvira the most this entire time.

“I’m moving in with Hwei,” Kuvira interrupted, saying the first lie she could think of.

“What?” Opal blinked, sitting up straighter in her seat, squinting. “Who?”

“Hwei,” Kuvira repeated. “My co-worker. We dated each other a while ago and she wants to be more serious, so we’re moving in together.” She was almost rambling to fill the silence, to keep Opal from talking, but she soon realized there wasn’t that much to say.

“Oh,” Opal said. She grinned humourlessly. “Just like that?” Kuvira glanced away. There was no way she could live together with Opal after this. “Anyway,” Opal went on, apparently like nothing had changed, “I still have to tell you something.”

“You’re not going to ask about the logistics of me moving out?” Kuvira asked, combative. “I won’t be able to split rent with you anymore. You’ll need to find another roommate.”

“Kuvira,” Opal said, almost laughing. She was nervous, confused. “Can you just let me talk?” Kuvira found that she really, really couldn’t.

“What’s there to talk about?” Kuvira asked.

“Kuvira, I’m—I’m in _love_ with you,” Opal said.

And there it was. All of ‘I love you’s’ finally tallying up to amount to this definitive statement. Not ‘love’, but ‘ _in_ love’, being totally captured and imprisoned by it, something passively accepted. Kuvira was horrified and sad on Opal’s behalf. The confession sunk like a stone in Kuvira’s gut.

“I know,” Kuvira admitted, voice hardly above a whisper. Opal looked at her, mouth hanging open, waiting for Kuvira to go on, to say what she wanted her to say. Kuvira met her eye then, and firmly told her, with a touch of honesty for a change, “That’s partially why I’m moving out.”

“Oh,” Opal said quietly. Like the sound had been struck out of her.

Kuvira cleared her throat, like the bitch that she was.

“I mean, again, I don’t,” Opal said. “I don’t _need_ —anything to change, I just—had to be honest about the way I felt. The way I feel.”

“You don’t know what you feel,” Kuvira bit out before she could stop herself. She knew as she said it that she should have just kept her thought to herself.

“Excuse me?” Opal asked, incredulous but not yet angry.

“I mean,” Kuvira said swiftly. “You love me, Opal. I know that. I love you, too. And _you_ know that. But, you’re young. Trust me when I say there’s a difference between loving someone and being in love with them.”

“I _know_ there’s a difference,” Opal said quietly. “And you’re literally _just_ a year older than me.”

“It doesn’t matter,” Kuvira said harshly. “Whether you wanted things to change. Whether you don’t want them to. Because they are. They have.” She was looking at the food between them, untouched. Her meal probably would’ve tasted good if she’d had the appetite for it. There was no way she could touch it now. “I’m moving, so for your sake, I hope you love me as a friend.”

“Yeah,” Opal said. “With ‘Hwei’, huh?” She obviously didn’t believe Kuvira. Which she was right to do, but Kuvira wasn’t lying about one thing. She _was_ moving.

“It’s cheaper rent, splitting with her,” Kuvira invented easily. “Your mother can take care of you. It’s for the best,” Kuvira said, trying to take the bite out of it. Calculatedly, she reached out and carefully placed a hand on Opal’s shoulder to comfort her.

“You know, I thought I was in love with Izumi too, but I didn’t know what love was. And I stayed with her, I followed her, for the longest time because I thought that’s what love was. The best thing she ever did for me was break up with me. And I didn’t see it at the time, but—”

“No,” Opal said. She looked up at Kuvira, nostrils flaring. She was angry, _really_ angry. Kuvira hadn’t seen Opal this upset in ages and her fury had never been directed towards Kuvira. “No, you don’t get to say that this is for my own good! And you don’t get to say that this was a bad thing!”

“Opal—” Kuvira tried.

 _“No!”_ Opal yelled, shoving Kuvira’s hand off of her. “No, you don’t get to act like this—living with me, having sex with me, was a bad thing!”

“Opal,” Kuvira said, glancing around nervously because, sure this was Republic City and fairly liberal but, no one really needed to know they’d had sex. There was no way Kuvira was going to be let into Kwong’s after this.

“No, screw you!” Opal yelled. “You don’t get to act like this, like you’re doing me a fucking favour by breaking up with me. If this, _us_ , was such a bad thing, you should never have done it in the first place!” Ouch.

“Opal, _you_ asked _me_ for this,” Kuvira said quietly, trying to regain her ground. “Every time, _you_ pushed for it. And I said _yes_ , and now— _now_ I’m saying no.” Opal’s mouth snapped shut, and she looked really hurt.

“Fuck you, Kuvira,” she said, voice trembling. _“Fuck_ you. This _wasn’t_ just about me. Maybe the first few times, but it’s _not_ anymore. It’s _not_ all in my head.” She sounded so vulnerable. This was exactly why she deserved better than Kuvira, better than this relationship. Guilt clutched at Kuvira’s chest.

“It wasn’t,” was all Kuvira could get out. “But—”

“You don’t get to have it both ways, Kuvira,” Opal hissed, moving forward into Kuvira’s space and poking Kuvira’s chest. “You don’t get to say that this relationship was bad thing for me, and then have gone through with it anyway and act like you’re doing _this_ for the best. This relationship—it was a good thing! And guess what Kuvira! I would’ve fallen in love with you anyway! Even if we’d _never_ slept together!”

“Opal,” Kuvira said, glancing around. Opal had yelled out that last part a little louder than necessary again and it had attracted glances even from the people who’d been pretending not to notice.

“No!” Opal yelled again. _“Listen_ to me. This _was_ a good thing. And if you don’t want it, _fine_. But it’s not about me. _You’re_ scared. And I don’t know why—of my feelings, or—or of my family. And that at least I understand, I _understand_. But you _don’t_ get to make it about _me_ when it’s really about _you_ ,” Opal said fiercely.

Opal really knew how to hit where it hurt. And it must’ve shown on Kuvira’s face because Opal floundered momentarily, all her fight draining out of her. She hung her head, ashamed. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I—if this is how you feel then, then I’m not going to try and convince you otherwise. I’m sure Hwei is really nice. But, I had to tell you how I feel.”

“Opal,” Kuvira said, the patience in her voice disguising how she was shaking inside. She really could have been a politician. “I’m not breaking up with you.” Opal looked at her, eyes a little wet, close to bloodshot. She reminded her, “We were never together.”

Opal’s shoulders slumped. Kuvira could see that she’d finally given up. Kuvira cleared her throat.“I’m still moving,”she said. Opal said nothing and Kuvira took that as an opportunity. “I can cover you for a month until you get a new roommate. It might be a little tight but I’m sure your mom wouldn’t mind helping you out.”

Opal staggered back suddenly like Kuvira had struck her. She looked at Kuvira with those wide watery eyes and clenched her jaw. “I’m not keeping the apartment,” was all she said. And then she turned around and left Kuvira, understandably, with the bill. Kuvira wondered if she could con Bolin into helping her move.


	17. Chapter 17

Uncertain of what else to do, Kuvira walked. She hadn’t really known what to do, talking to Opal. But she was confident she’d done the right thing, the only possible thing, by cutting ties. Especially because … especially because Opal had claimed she loved Kuvira. Was _in_ love with her. Yeah. There was nothing else Kuvira could’ve done.

She still couldn’t believe that Opal had said that. Obviously, it wasn’t true. Kuvira would’ve noticed. But then, it wasn’t like Kuvira had ever been in love herself. Not with anyone but Suyin, if you could call it that. Which only made the whole situation that much worse.

There probably _was_ a nicer way Kuvira could’ve handled Opal’s admission. A way that wouldn’t have made Opal storm off crying, and somehow calmly, maturely agree that they were better off as whatever they were not. Opal had always been much more mature than Kuvira, it wasn’t like that wasn’t a possibility. And it seemed like it had been. Until Kuvira had just outright rejected Opal’s confession.

If Kuvira had just _let_ Opal say that she was in love, Opal probably would’ve been fine with just being friends, with Kuvira moving out even. In fact, it seemed like she had been in the process of swallowing her feelings, whatever they were, if not for the fact that Kuvira just couldn’t stand to let Opal make that kind of claim without saying. _No_. No way. Opal _wasn’t_ in love.

For one, Kuvira would’ve noticed. She would’ve seen _something_ , though she didn’t know what. Bataar had thought he was in love with her. Still did, most likely. And Kuvira could pinpoint the moment with dread and trepidation just as fresh now as it had been back then where his gaze had gone from smirking camaraderie to something puppyish and cloying. He could call it love, even if Kuvira secretly, nastily, felt like if he had ever loved her at all he would’ve left her alone. When she’d come to his door, he would have locked it.

Izumi had made Kuvira feel like she was in love. Weak and waiting on her, jealous and paranoid about her every whim, so terrified of losing what Kuvira thought they had. Again, Kuvira knew it wasn’t love as much as it was desperation. And, truth be told, Kuvira had been like that from the start, Izumi had just put enough pressure on that relationship to really make Kuvira realize it.

And there was Hwei, with whom Kuvira had had the opposite problem. Hwei, who was so nice and funny, strong and talented, and so entirely separate from Kuvira that Kuvira might as well have built a barrier made of brick between them. Hwei wasn’t in love with her, Kuvira was so fundamentally unlovable that that never really would’ve been an issue, but Kuvira knew they had gotten close.

There had been moments, with some of the women Kuvira had been with. One night, for example, Ginger had looked so small and almost frail, watching Kuvira leave her place, like being with Kuvira had been a reminder of what she couldn’t have. Kuvira, being the piece of shit that she was, kept seeing her because she knew Ginger wouldn’t ask for more, even if she wanted it.

And there had been way Hwei had leaned against her shoulder one time, smiling up at her with a closed smile. It hadn’t been long afterwards that Kuvira had broken up with her. But well, now as far as anyone was concerned, Kuvira and Hwei were going to move in together somehow. What a stupid lie.

But there hadn’t been a moment, Kuvira thought, where she had seen it really click for Opal. That new shine in someone’s eyes had never really come. Maybe it was just the inevitability of fucking someone you loved, though Kuvira had loved Bataar and fucking him hadn’t done much more than ruin them.

Maybe, maybe the truth was, the reason why Kuvira had never noticed a difference was because, like Opal had said, sex wasn’t why her feelings for Kuvira had shifted. That Opal’s feelings had predated it, and that the reason why … the reason why Kuvira hadn’t noticed a change was because there hadn’t been any. That the change had simply been that Opal had decided to talk about it.

But that was, again, unbelievable because Kuvira wasn’t someone you could really fall in love with. Not really. She shook her head. Opal was clearly offended, but Kuvira couldn’t help that. But, Kuvira came to see as she drifted out of her thoughts and back to reality, finding herself almost at the other side of downtown, that she’d hurt Opal all the same. And she could at least regret that.

Kuvira sighed out loud, turning out her pockets and finding her phone. She knew she should at least be honest with the fact that she’d lied about Hwei, though probably not about moving out. She dialed Opal’s number, and the phone rang until Opal’s voicemail picked up.

_“‘Hi, this is Opal Beifong. I’m away from my phone or busy, so if you want to contact me you can leave a message or just text me. Bye!’”_

Kuvira felt a twinge of guilt at how happy and carefree Opal had been when she’d recorded that message. She quickly shot off a text, apologizing to Opal and asking to speak with her, as she found her way to the subway. By the time she found herself on a car home Opal still hadn’t texted her back or even read the message.

Outside in the streets, Kuvira called her again. And again, nothing. Somewhere between the second and twelfth call, Kuvira started to become concerned. It wasn’t like Opal to not answer her phone with at least a text back, though she and Kuvira had never really fought before.

Kuvira was still calling Opal when she finally unlocked the door, only to hear a phone ring from somewhere in the apartment, obviously Opal’s. Kuvira paced over to it, anxiety lighting in her veins. She turned on the screen. Just a bunch of missed calls, all from Kuvira.

Kuvira unlocked the phone, Opal’s password was ‘Juicy’ after her first pet, and stared at Opal’s recent calls. _Bolin, Korra, Mom_. Kuvira realized that if Opal didn’t have her phone there was a chance that no one knew where she was. Impulsively, she dialed Bolin.

“Y’ello?” Bolin chirped in answer.

“Is Opal with you?” Kuvira barked into the phone. It had been about an hour, long enough for Opal to curl up at his place.

“Oh, hey Kuvira,” Bolin said cheerfully, totally unaffected. “Long time, no see. Or, hear, I guess.”

“Bolin, answer the question,” Kuvira said, barely beating back the urge to yell at him.

“What, Opal?” Bolin asked. “Well, if you _were_ wondering,” he said glumly. “We actually broke up awhile ago.”

“Bolin,” Kuvira stammered, stunned by his massive stupidity.

“I’m sure she told you,” Bolin sighed heavily. “It just kind of sucks, you know? We really liked each other but sometimes it just doesn’t work. We wanted different things, I guess. We’re still friends, though.”

“Bolin!” Kuvira found her voice. “Is Opal _physically_ with you, right now!”

“Why, is something wrong?” Bolin asked, finally sounding concerned. Kuvira almost laughed hysterically into the receiver.

“You—” she started, before realizing threatening him was maybe not going to yield the results she wanted. “Just,” she broke down, pinching the anxiety building up in her forehead. “If you see her, just text me that she’s alright, okay?”

“Hang on,” Bolin said in a brief moment of lucidity. “You’re calling from her phone. Is Opal okay?”

“I—” Kuvira began, prepared to lie. But she just couldn’t. “I don’t. I don’t know.” To her horror, she almost started to cry. “We got into an argument, and she left, and I told her she could stay at the apartment, but when I came home, I found her phone, and—”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Bolin spoke up. “Who else have you called?”

“Just her,” Kuvira said stupidly. “And I mean, obviously I found the phone. And then you.” Her voice came out pinched with fear.

“Listen,” Bolin said firmly. “I’ll call Korra, and some of our friends from class. Do you know where else she might go?” Kuvira’s mouth hung open.

“Zaofu,” she admitted after a moment.

“Maybe you should call her family,” Bolin said. Then, amazingly he said, “Actually, _you_ call Korra. _I’ll_ call her mom. Does that sound like a plan?”

“I just need to know that she’s okay,” Kuvira mumbled, sinking to kneel on the floor.

“I’m sure she’s fine,” Bolin said. “She’s kind of a badass, you know? I’m going to hang up now. Are you going to call Korra?”

“I’ll call Korra,” Kuvira said numbly.

“Okay,” Bolin said. “Text me. Or, I’ll text you.” Kuvira nodded, though he couldn’t see her.

After a few moments of being hung up on, when she finally remembered herself, Kuvira quickly dialed Korra. Thankfully, it didn’t take long for her to answer.

“Y’ello Opal,” Korra said chipperly on the other end.

“Korra, have you seen her?” Kuvira asked.

“Whoa, Kuvira,” Korra said. “Are you alright?”

“Opal,” Kuvira said, voice sounding shrill and panicky to her ears. “We got in an argument and I don’t know where she is.”

“I don’t know where she is either,” Korra said. “When did you argue?”

“An hour ago, maybe,” Kuvira said, hands starting to shake. Fuck. Kuvira heard her own phone chirp in her pocket and she nearly dropped Opal’s phone trying to retrieve it. She quickly brought it up to her face. Bolin had texted her.

_“Her fam says she’s safe_ _!!_ _”_

Kuvira nearly sank into the floor with relief. “Fuck,” she murmured.

“Kuvira?” Korra prompted.

“She’s safe,” she said. “False alarm.”

Korra sounded uncertain, if a little amused. “What did you think happened?”

“I don’t know,” Kuvira answered dully.

“Well, if there was an issue, I’ve got close connections with the Chief of Police, so we would’ve found her,” Korra joked.

Kuvira realized then she hadn’t been worried that something bad might’ve happened to Opal. She was worried because something bad had already happened. She was worried because, while she’d pushed Opal away, Opal had actually left and Kuvira regretted it. She regretted hurting her.

“Kuvira?” Korra prompted.

“I fucked up, Korra,” Kuvira admitted, sliding her palm up to cover her forehead, squeezing. “I hurt Opal.”

“What?” Korra asked.

“I told her—awful things,” Kuvira confessed. “I pushed her away. I need to apologize.” She needed to _change_.

“What did you say?” Korra asked, voice sounding muffled and tense as though she was pulling on a jacket. “I’m coming over, by the way.” Kuvira’s heart clenched in her chest, suddenly overwhelmed with gratitude for Korra being who she was.

“She told me she was in love with me,” Kuvira said. “And I just threw it back in her face.”

“Ouch,” Korra winced. She didn’t sound all that surprised that Opal was in love with her though. But then, neither was Kuvira, not actually. “What do you want to say to her?”

“I have to apologize,” Kuvira said. “And tell her that—” Kuvira couldn’t finish her sentence. She didn’t know what to say, only that she needed to say it.

“Well, where is she?” Korra asked. “I mean, if she hasn’t been murdered, there’s still time for a second chance, right?” Kuvira’s panic had really made it sound like Opal had been kidnapped or something. Kuvira glanced back down at Bolin’s text.

“Well, shit,” she realized.

“What?” Korra asked, breathing heavy, probably walking fast. Kuvira let out a sigh. It was time, apparently. Time to go back to Zaofu.


	18. Chapter 18

Kuvira had limited travelling experience but Zaofu was still, in her opinion, one of the strangest places in the Earth Kingdom. It had rapidly become normal once Kuvira had started to live in the city as a child, but it only had taken her a few months outside to really reflect on how bizarre it was.

Zaofu was what you got when you crossed starving artists with money. It was like a gated commune, with a little bit of a cult of personality for the matriarch, but other than that was just a beautiful tourist trap of a city. Still, as Korra flipped through the pamphlet she’d found on the train, Kuvira had to admit it was beautiful.

“Thanks for getting my ticket,” Kuvira told her quietly as they rode the train into the city. “I’ll repay you when I get my next paycheck.” She was racking up her obligations rapidly.

“You’re my friend, Kuvira,” Korra dismissed, adjusting her rucksack, then tugging one of her long ponytails out from being trapped beneath a strap, wincing to herself. “Besides,” she added teasingly. “I’m sort of a romantic.” Kuvira couldn’t help but bristle at the implication.

“Me and Opal aren’t together like that,” she said.

“Yeah?” Korra asked skeptically. She folded her arms, pamphlet crumpling, raising an eyebrow. “That’s what we’re going with?”

Kuvira mulled it over. “Not anymore, at least,” she admitted. Korra sighed.

Kuvira knew that Korra wanted her to talk more about what had happened, but Kuvira still could barely wrap her own mind around it. All she had was her guilt and her worry. It was one thing to just hurt yourself, it was another to hurt someone who didn’t deserve it. Kuvira had been needlessly cruel, and Opal was owed an apology.

But then, so did so many people. Just seeing the unique structures of Zaofu crown on the horizon, sleek and floral, just brought that all crowding in on her. Kuvira wasn’t ready to come back here. She never thought she would. And the realization that she couldn’t just back out, not with Korra here, already dozing off on her shoulder again, almost choked her.

Kuvira looked down at her hands, her knuckles pulled taut and pale, hands clenched in fists she hadn’t noticed she’d made. She released her grip, smoothing her palms against her pants, trying to calm back down to baseline. This wasn’t the worst she’d ever felt. She suspected her stress wasn’t going to let up but she knew her odds of seeing anyone but Huan, and Opal if she was lucky, were low.

She didn’t even know what she’d say to Opal when she saw her. Getting on her knees and begging forgiveness was sounding more and more appealing but she knew Opal would want the more humiliating alternative of an honest and thorough explanation. And she deserved one, though Kuvira felt like Opal probably understood Kuvira’s issues better than Kuvira herself did.

Even Korra kept on looking at Kuvira like she had her number and was just kind enough to keep it to herself. For now. Kuvira expected that there’d come a point that Korra would also lose patience with Kuvira’s bullshit. But for now, Kuvira just hung onto her, grateful that she hadn’t somehow managed to drive Korra away, too.

“Are we there yet?” Korra mumbled, eyes still shut tight, though she’d probably felt the train start to slow.

“Yeah,” Kuvira uttered. The telltale sharp screech of metal on metal as the train wound down hadn’t changed in all these years. Together, they disembarked.

When Kuvira had left this place, she’d consoled herself with the thought that she would never return. But now, stepping past security guards that still recognized her all these years later, and looked at her with some apprehension, it felt as though it had been inevitable. Kuvira pulled up the hood of her jacket and hastened her pace, Korra falling in step. Kuvira headed to Huan’s studio lead by just her memory of the place.

<3

Kuvira and Huan had been closest in age and had attended many of the same classes in school. From that, and other reasons, Kuvira would have considered him her best friend if asked. Opal, a year too young, had been off Kuvira’s radar entirely. They’d gotten along, but Kuvira had found real kinship with the Beifong boys above anyone else, for better or for worse.

She’d always fit in best with the misfits of the Beifong family, being one herself, in a sense. Opal had been the darling baby girl of the Beifong household. The older boys had felt stifled and unappreciated, in one way or another, in ways Kuvira had never considered Opal might feel though Opal had been the only sibling to ever leave the Beifong household. Consequently, Kuvira had been much closer with Bataar and Huan.

Her friendship with Bataar and had been born out of her enjoying his creativity, analytical way of thinking, and his dream to push past the boundaries set out by his parents, some day, though he never really had. Bataar, in turn, had indulged Kuvira’s own ideas and ideals, listening to her and taking her seriously when she felt like Suyin never would. In all honesty, Bataar had probably been Kuvira’s closest friend before everything had gone to shit.

That wasn’t to discount her relationship with Huan. Their relationship had been different. They hadn’t been as close, both of them playing their cards too close to their respective chests to ever be fully vulnerable with each other, but Huan was snarky, full of dry wit and closeted homosexuality, and there was little wonder that Kuvira had gotten along so well with him.

His dramatics had always amused her, and even in his quieter moments there had been a strong, peaceful kinship between them, him working on whatever monstrosity he deemed art, her reading books, or writing reports, in perfect, comfortable silence. She’d spent hundreds of sunny afternoons in Huan’s studio. She could’ve found the place without directions. She could have found her way in the dark.

And as expected, Huan was in his studio, set in front of his sculpture, busy at work. Kuvira had always felt, perhaps wrongly, that people rarely changed, but here she felt that she was right. With a nod to the security guard that stood outside, Kuvira stepped into the room, Korra trailing at her side like an uncertain shadow.

“Kuvira,” Huan greeted when she walked in, barely acknowledging her.

“Hey Huan,” Kuvira said weakly. Her voice came out raw and awkward. She’d only texted Huan ahead of time that she was coming, knowing or at least hoping that he could be discrete, that he wouldn’t get anyone else involved. For lack of anything better to do or say, she gestured at Korra. “This is my friend, Korra.”

Huan nodded but otherwise didn’t look away from his sculpture. Kuvira tried to see what it was but it was still … abstract. One of those art pieces that were meant to look pretty but mean nothing. Not that it was really succeeding in the former goal, but, then, Kuvira had no taste for art.

“I’ll uh, just be outside,” Korra said, bobbing her head awkwardly and giving Kuvira a quick wink and patting her shoulder jovially before leaving the two of them alone. The door clicked closed behind her.

Huan looked different in small ways, unchanged from a distance. His hair had gotten longer since they’d been teenagers, flowing down his back like he was trying to win a record. And he wore makeup now. It suited him. And it seemed that his voice had been a little deeper when he’d spoken. But everything else was almost startlingly identical.

“Long time, no see,” Kuvira offered up to fill up the silence.

“Or hear. Or text, even,” Huan replied casually, arching a critical eyebrow at her and wasting no time. Kuvira gritted her teeth. This wasn’t going to be easy.

“Do you know why I’m here, Huan?” Kuvira asked, deciding to dispense with pleasantries, knowing Huan could always up the ante in that regard.

“Opal isn’t in Zaofu,” Huan said, surprising her.

“She isn’t?” Kuvira gasped out loud. She suddenly felt a flash of irritation. If Opal wasn’t here, then that was something Huan could have told Kuvira before she’d made herself and Korra travel all the way out here. “Then, where the hell _is_ she? She could be in _danger_.”

“She isn’t in danger,” Huan replied, rolling his eyes, finally stepping away from his sculpture. His eyes were cold on Kuvira. “Believe it or not you’re _not_ her only friend.”

“She’s not with her ex,” Kuvira argued, mind racing. “That guy couldn’t lie to save his life.”

“She’s not with him,” Huan agreed. “But she’s talked to us. She’s fine. I mean, as much as she could be, if she’s fighting with you.” Kuvira didn’t feel assuaged.

“She’s talked to you?” she asked, a little devastated.

“Yeah,” Huan said. “I _am_ her sibling.” He looked at her with something tricky in his gaze. “You had that option once, if I recall correctly.”

“Please, just tell me what you know Huan,” Kuvira said, rubbing the tension that had grown in her forehead. She’d forgotten how little he fucked around. Huan looked stubbornly on.

“She’s staying at the house of someone she was friends with when she was a kid,” he offered. “Someone she reconnected with at university.” Kuvira’s face twisted in confusion.

“Thanks for the riddle,” she said.

“You’re welcome,” Huan said seriously. He glared at Kuvira. “I’m going to tell Opal you came, by the way.”

“Do it,” Kuvira dared, crossing her arms. “Tell her I want to see her.” Huan pursed his lips, considering.

“Never mind,” he said.

“ _Huan_.”

“If you tell me what you did,” Huan decided, “that will have an impact on my behaviour going forward.” Kuvira opened her mouth. Then shut it. There was no way she could tell him that Opal was in love with her, that they’d been sleeping together, _any_ of that mess.

“She admitted something very vulnerable to me, and I used it to hurt her,” Kuvira said. Huan nodded.

“Seems in character,” he said.

“I did it,” Kuvira said, sounding completely unhinged to her own ears, “because I’m a coward. Because I’m terrified of this family, and of getting closer to her, and of my own issues. So, I hurt her because I thought I’d be saving her from myself, which maybe I was, but, really, I was just trying to protect myself. But I’m _done_ trying to protect myself if it means that I have to hurt people I love.”

Huan stared at her, like a sphinx weighing out the validity of her answer. “Go talk to my mother before you leave,” he said at last, “and I’ll text something nice to Opal.”

“Huan, _enough_ with the mind games,” Kuvira hissed.

“You said you were done trying to protect yourself if it meant hurting people you love,” Huan said simply, detached. “As far as I’m concerned this is two birds with one stone.” Kuvira gaped at him and he looked at her unsympathetically. “You’ve talked to my brother and you’ve talked to me. I think there’s someone else you should speak to before you leave.”

“Baatar,” Kuvira realized, “ _told_ you about seeing me in Republic City?”

“I tuned out the details,” Huan shrugged. “But yes. Are you surprised?”

Kuvira didn’t know what to think. She hadn’t asked him not to, but there was something about the fact that he’d probably talked to Suyin about her. That he’d probably talked to Opal about seeing her again, that Opal knew Kuvira through Baatar’s eyes as well. It just felt strange.

“You don’t have to talk to my mother,” Huan said, his words kind even if he was doing his best to ensure his voice was colourless. “But you should.” Kuvira nodded, moving to go.

But, before she could leave, he grabbed her lightly by the wrist. She hesitated. “I know I’m being a jerk,” he admitted, toneless, “but I missed you.”

“I missed you too, Huan,” she admitted, voice heavy.

“You feel more like family than any of my siblings,” he said.

“I can’t,” Kuvira started, almost begging him. “I _can’t_ be a Beifong.”

“Are you implying I want to be one?” Huan asked, letting go of her wrist. They shared a brief look, and the expression on his face was almost a smile. So was hers.

“You should come out to Republic City more often,” Kuvira offered. “I’ll … talk to Suyin but, I really, I don’t think I can come out here again.”

Even just being back here, in Huan’s studio, was bringing back memories so emotionally volatile they were leaving Kuvira dizzy. Seeing the guards eye her up, even a few citizens recognize her as she walked by, it had been such a scandal when she’d left, had made her feel like worse than a stranger.

“Things aren’t as bad as you think they are,” Huan said.

“I _said_ I’d talk to her,” Kuvira snapped, feeling less generous.

A rare, genuine, smile crossed Huan’s lips. “Text me more often, alright?” Neither of them were much for hugs, but that was about as close as they would get. Kuvira nodded.

Huan yawned then, like he was bored. “I have to get back to my work,” he announced, but his tone was tight like he was trying to avoid expressing some emotion.

“Of course,” Kuvira said, a small smile pricking at her own mouth. “I’ll speak to you later.” He nodded, not quite looking at her.

Kuvira thought, if he wanted to, he could really succeed as an artist in Republic City. Still, he remained living at home, even at his age. It always surprised Kuvira that Opal, of all her siblings, had been the one to actually leave. It probably didn’t matter why, but it was true that if Kuvira wanted to maintain a relationship with him, she’d probably have to become used to Zaofu. Maybe she would.

Outside, Korra had been reclining on a bench, waving her phone around to catch a signal. When she saw Kuvira, she shoved her phone in her pocket, looking both ashamed and concerned.

“Did you find Opal?” she asked. Kuvira shook her head.

“Apparently she never left Republic City,” she replied, guilt welling in her chest. “Sorry about dragging you out here.” Korra stretched her arms above her head, grunting.

“Don’t worry about it,” she said. “It was cool to come out here for the day. Zaofu is neat.” She raised an eyebrow hopefully. “Maybe we could stick around, maybe grab some dinner? Unless … unless you’re still avoiding people.”

Kuvira let out a sigh. “Actually,” she said, embracing Korra’s patient loyalty. “I have one thing left I have to do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Decided to switch the update day to Sunday perhaps??


	19. Chapter 19

They’d known she was coming. Zaofu was a city with the heart of a small town and word spread through it as easily as water through the gutters. Kuvira even recognized a few of the guards as they welcomed her and Korra to the estate, and it was clear they recognized her. They didn’t even call ahead to inform Suyin she had arrived. But then, Suyin undoubtedly already knew this too.

With each step forward, Kuvira’s urge to run intensified. But, with Korra marching alongside her, eyes wide and interested in the surroundings as the city unfolded around her, Kuvira was forced to stay on a forward trajectory. But it was still raw to see the city. After all these years.

Outside, Kuvira could smell the metal oxidize as rain started falling, the scent of dust becoming mud, of earth, that you just didn’t smell in larger cities. Republic City was all crisp air and the scent of food and perfumes. Zaofu had been cut out of the landscape in a valley, and it was still so incredibly lush. When Zaofu finally reached spring, Kuvira knew it would be a green one. The knowledge made Kuvira’s heart feel weighty and sad, nearly homesick.

Zaofu had never been home, not really. But walking up the steps to Suyin’s estate, Kuvira felt familiarity like an ache. The halls were decorated, lit, with both positive and negative memories, and Kuvira trudged through them, heavily, like she was wading through water, leading Korra further into the estate.

A security guard brought them to Suyin’s office and knocked on the door for them. “Yes?” Suyin’s voice called out.

“Your guests have arrived,” the guard said. She glanced apprehensively over at Kuvira, and Kuvira felt like she should remember her name.

“Let them in!” Suyin called out again.

The mystery guard opened the door, and gestured for Kuvira and Korra to enter. Kuvira had done her best to forget about this place, and this guard was just another casualty of that. Still, clearly, they’d never been friends. Kuvira dragged herself away from her thoughts and finally took stock of the room, jolted by her own surprise to see Suyin again.

“Kuvira,” Suyin smiled, walking forward, genuine and beautiful. Kuvira blinked and when she opened her eyes again Suyin was still there.

She was dressed in a long green dress, of course, hanging elegantly from her strong and slender frame. Her office was lit by multiple avant-garde lamps, catching the edges of her hair, making them shine almost white. Kuvira had known that Suyin would be here, and yet, hadn’t internalized that they would meet again.

Suyin moved to hug Kuvira and Kuvira took a step back, dodging her as easily as she would in a dance. After seeing Suyin for the first time in so long, and the time was really hitting Kuvira now, Kuvira knew she couldn’t afford to let Suyin touch her. Suyin noticed, retracting her arms back to her side, looking regretful. Kuvira’s mouth felt dry.

Kuvira didn’t know what to say to her, looking at Suyin now. She’d spent so many hours in her youth staring at this face, stitching together a replica of Suyin in her mind from glances she’d stolen while trying to seem like she wasn’t looking. Being on Suyin’s dance troupe, taking the opportunity and permission to watch Suyin laugh and direct and move, had been such a favoured pastime in her youth. It came back easily now, with Kuvira finding no words to say, just standing there gaping.

“Uh,” Korra spoke up awkwardly beside Kuvira. “If you don’t mind, I might just, duck out.”

“Yes, of course, Korra—right?” Suyin asked, blinking, as though she’d been equally caught off guard to see Kuvira. “You’re one of Opal’s friends as well.”

“Right,” Korra said, smiling a little, but her eyes were concerned on Kuvira, scanning her like an x-ray.

“It’s about lunchtime, so if you’d like the guard can escort you to the dining room,” Suyin offered. “We have a magnificent chef. Kuvira can attest to that.”

Kuvira cleared her throat and found some words. “The same guy still works here?”

“Of course,” Suyin laughed, in a way which was painfully familiar. Only fuckups left Zaofu. Well, fuckups and Opal.

“Okay, well,” Korra spoke up again. “I might do that then. If that’s cool.” She was looking at Kuvira.

“We’ll be along shortly,” Suyin offered. Korra nodded, and just as slowly she turned around to leave the room. With Korra gone, Kuvira let out a breath of air. Alone, Kuvira looked Suyin over with less self-consciousness.

Suyin, still, was lovely. Her hair was perhaps a little grayer, there were more wrinkles at the corners of her eyes and mouth now. But her skin was still deep, her eyes still warm and interested and intelligent. She and Opal had the same colour of eyes, but their shape was different, Opal’s wider and brighter, Suyin’s narrowed with wisdom and good humour. Kuvira found herself seeing Opal in Suyin where she’d never noticed Suyin in Opal. Kuvira looked away, feeling guilty and sick for reasons she couldn’t describe.

“Sorry for imposing on you,” Kuvira said at last.

“No, not at all,” Suyin insisted. “You’re always welcome here Kuvira.” Kuvira wished she could believe her. “How has it been in Republic City?”

“Good,” Kuvira stumbled, embellishing in her awkwardness, in her unwillingness to betray too much. “It’s been … fine. I’ve been …”

“Did you have lunch?” Suyin asked, taking pity on Kuvira but interrupting her all the same. “We can go have lunch with your friend.” She was clearly uncomfortable being alone with Kuvira.

“No, I’m,” Kuvira muttered. “I have to … we should talk.”

Suyin nodded, leaning back a little where she stood, shoulders slumping back as she waited. But Kuvira didn’t really know what to say. What could she possibly say to this woman?

“I didn’t know you had a sister,” Kuvira blurted out, after a few moments of silence. Suyin seemed just a s surprised as the change in topic as Kuvira.

“What, Lin? I don’t hide that fact,” Suyin said. “But …” she relented, “it’s certainly possible that I never talked about her with you.”

Suyin loved her family, never failed to dote on her husband, her mother, or any of her children given the opportunity and sometimes making her own opportunity out of sheer pride. Kuvira couldn’t decide if she’d been left out or included, not knowing about Lin Beifong before Korra had.

“Why is that?” Kuvira breathed out.

Suyin considered the question for a moment. “We don’t get along,” she said. “It’s something I’m ashamed of, I suppose.” Kuvira nodded, wishing she had pockets to keep her hands in.

“When I was younger, I was a pretty rebellious kid,” Suyin went on, for lack of any clear direction on Kuvira’s part. “Lin … was not. She’s actually the Republic City Chief of Police, now, as I’m sure you know. We got in a fight one day, me on the wrong side of the law, and … it was a bad fight. I … injured her. Permanently.”

“And that … you stopped … being family?” Kuvira asked, surprised.

“It was a pretty bad fight,” Suyin said. “I was young … around the age you’d left Zaofu. “I’d been the rebel, and Lin had been the one to suffer the consequences. After that, I went my way, she went hers. And we never spoke again.” She frowned, the lipstick on her thin lips crumpling ever so slightly, looking troubled. “I love my sister. But yes, it’s very possible I never talked about her.”

Kuvira nodded. She didn’t k now what exactly she’d been trying to figure out when she’d asked the question, but still she felt like she understood their situation a little better now. Suyin cocked her head to the side, regarding Kuvira.

“I guess I must commend you for pursuing Opal now, after your fight,” she offered. “She didn’t tell me the details but … I’m proud of you for having the maturity and humility to seek forgiveness when I did not.”

“Me and Opal aren’t sisters,” Kuvira said immediately. She wasn’t about to tell Suyin what they were, especially when she was still figuring that out herself, especially when the answer at this stage was likely ‘nothing at all’, but she didn’t like the thought of Suyin thinking of them and her sister in the same light.

“You know,” Suyin pressed on, voice light and teasing, missing Kuvira’s distress. “ _Huan_ still considers you a sibling.”

“Huan thought he was adopted his whole life,” Kuvira breathed out. “I’m not …” she was having difficulties speaking.

“I know things are, difficult,” Suyin said, because _fuck_ they were really getting into things now. Suyin frowned, haunted. “What happened with Junior. Being a teenager is a … difficult, confusing time.”

“Me and Baatar are fine, now,” Kuvira said, desperate. They’d had closure, apparently.

“I’m proud of that too,” Suyin said, reaching out but not touching Kuvira.

“We aren’t,” Kuvira said, trying to keep pursuing the argument that Kuvira was not family until Suyin understood, but something caught her mind. “You’re not …” Kuvira started. “ _Disgusted_ with me?”

“Kuvira!” Suyin called out, surprised. “Never. I would _never_ feel like that.” Kuvira suspected she might, if she knew what had happened between her and Opal. But, Kuvira had slept with Suyin’s son, all the same, and Suyin apparently didn’t begrudge her that. Kuvira looked down at the ground, trying to keep herself from throwing up.

“I know a lot has happened,” Suyin said softly. “But I still consider you a daughter, and you always have a place here in Zaofu.” Which was everything Kuvira had been afraid of.

“You’re not,” Kuvira started. “You’re _not_ my mother.”

“I’d love to be that for you,” Suyin said, earnestly, and Kuvira knew it was true. Suyin adored being a mother, and it suited her as did dancing, fighting, leading … _anything_.

“Then I’m sorry that I could never be your daughter,” Kuvira said. “Or Bataar’s sister. Or Opal’s.”

Suyin hung back, looking wounded, but this was honestly the only chance Kuvira was ever going to have to make Suyin understand. “I’m sorry I fell in love with you,” Kuvira said, so angry and gut-wrenchingly fucking _sad_ she felt light-headed.

“I’m _sorry_ I had to be a creepy pathetic …” Kuvira choked on all the words she could call herself, afraid that Suyin might try to argue with them, “ _Not_ the daughter you wished I could be. Sorry I had to fuck up _everything_ including myself. And now Opal, too.” Everything started pouring out of her.

“Oh, Kuvira,” Suyin sighed, pulling Kuvira into her arms to hug her. And fuck it, but Kuvira needed it. She sobbed into Suyin’s shoulder like she’d probably needed to her whole life. Kuvira wasn’t a crier, which made the whole ordeal that much more humiliating, but she couldn’t stop.

Suyin guided them over to a couch, graceful in her care, and sat them down, letting Kuvira cry for a long time. Much longer than Kuvira deserved. But given that Kuvira rarely cried, and once she started, she couldn’t stop until the well ran dry. And even then, and afterwards, Suyin sat with her and held her.

Kuvira didn’t know how much time had passed, so lost in her feelings of shame and grief. All of the mistakes Kuvira had ever made in her life seemed to have caught up to her then, and she was crying over all of them, feeling pathetic and just … _sad_ , as Suyin ran her hand comfortingly across Kuvira’s back.

Eventually though, Kuvira had cried her last tear and she sat up, blowing her nose, feeling her breathing even out. She must’ve looked disgusting, blotchy and wet, but she could honestly say that Suyin didn’t look like she was judging her in the least. Suyin ran her hand through Kuvira’s hair, and pulled her back into a hug.

“You weren’t in love with me,” Suyin said, rubbing Kuvira’s back comfortingly with one hand. Kuvira tried to be angry about that. Angry the way Opal had been angry. But she was too exhausted. So, she considered Suyin’s words. She considered what it was, to be in love.

“You … desired me,” Suyin admitted. “I can see that now, even if I ignored it then. I’m sure you can understand why, but I didn’t know what to do. I tried treating you like a daughter, but I don’t think that helped. I tried treating you as a friend, which I think made things worse. There must have been something I could have done, but … just like Lin, I don’t know what it was. And now I feel like my time has passed.”

Kuvira thought about what she’d said. “Screw you for saying that I wasn’t in love with you,” Kuvira sniffed, voice stuffed up like she had a cold. “But you might be right.” Kuvira didn’t know what love was, but she suspected it was more than just a feeling. “Still, I wanted you, so I’m sorry.”

“Kuvira, you don’t have to be sorry,” Suyin said.

Kuvira froze in her arms.

“What you felt for me,” Suyin began, though it was clear she was still not comfortable speaking about it, even now when they were both adults. “I never could have returned those feelings. I never will.”

Kuvira nodded. She didn’t feel devastated the way she would have when she was a teenager. It didn’t feel like Suyin was crushing her hopes, but rather, setting her free from them.

“But they weren’t _wrong_ things to feel,” Suyin concluded. “They were perfectly harmless.”

“The way I reacted to them,” Kuvira said. “I hurt almost everyone in your family. That wasn’t exactly harmless. And I insulted your husband, which wasn’t really fair.” Though Kuvira didn’t really regret it. As nice as Bataar Sr. was he _was_ boring. Still, guilt clenched in Kuvira’s chest. “And now I’ve … now I’ve hurt Opal, too.”

“Sometimes we make mistakes,” Suyin said. “Often. _Often,_ we make mistakes. And usually what makes us, isn’t our mistakes, but the way we handle them.”

Kuvira considered Suyin’s words for a moment. “That’s pretty wise,” she snorted, voice still thick from crying.

“I read it in a fortune cookie,” Suyin admitted. “Kuvira, your feelings weren’t a mistake. And what happened, well … you and Junior made up. And you’re trying to make amends with Opal. You came back, after all the bad memories that occurred here. Kuvira … you’re a very brave young woman.”

“Then, I’m … not sorry,” Kuvira realized. “I mean, I am, but …” It had never really occurred to Kuvira. That her feelings for Suyin … weren’t the problem. She’d always carried them like a hot stone deep in her gut, shame for her own inappropriateness and inability to shut them off, and then shame for the way they had made her act. But here she was … being forgiven.

Suyin nodded. “You … may not be a daughter to me, Kuvira,” Suyin said. “But, you’ll always have a place here. Even if … even if you don’t want one.” Kuvira nodded.

“Opal is at her friend Asami Sato’s house in Republic City,” Suyin deliberated. “I’m going to call her after you leave so that she knows you’re coming, so she might not be there when you go back.” Kuvira nodded again. “But,” Suyin sniffed. “If she wanted me not to tell you, she should have talked to her mother.”

“Thanks, Suyin,” Kuvira said, surprised that Suyin would actually let Kuvira know where her daughter was. Suyin regarded her silently, and for a moment Kuvira was afraid that she knew about the two of them.

“Call me Su,” she reminded Kuvira instead, getting to her feet and helping Kuvira up as well. “Let’s get some lunch and you and Korra can tell me about Republic City.”


	20. Chapter 20

Apparently, Asami Sato and Opal had attended the same preschool for awhile and Suyin had known her mother. There had been some sort of tragedy, so Sato had moved, but she and Opal had still stayed in touch, writing letters to each other. And, upon reflection, Opal had mentioned Asami by name once or twice, reconnecting with her in university, but Kuvira had been too jealous of Bolin to pay attention, and Opal probably hadn’t felt like it had been her place to tell Kuvira the specifics.

Still, Kuvira wasn’t going to lie, the premise of Opal running into a childhood friend’s arms was cute enough to make her feel a little jealous initially, but it was an idiotic, instinctive jealousy, born out of childish possessiveness and Kuvira shunted it away almost immediately. If Kuvira had wanted to be Opal’s sweet childhood pen pal, that time had long since passed, and she had more important regrets to rectify.

“Are all rich people friends with each other?” Korra asked. After coming from Zaofu, they’d spent the night at Korra’s place and caught the bus to Asami’s estate the following morning. At this point Kuvira didn’t know if Korra was offering emotional support or was just tagging along for the drama.

In response, Kuvira looked pointedly at her friend. “I don’t know, Korra,” she said to the Southern Water Tribe’s chief’s daughter. _“Are_ they?” Korra shrugged a little sheepishly.

“Fair enough,” she said.

The Sato estate was huge; an old traditional building with the design of something first built with Republic City but with quality materials that suggested it had been remodelled since then. The grounds were open, and green, well-maintained. Kuvira could see a racetrack within walking distance. Opal could certainly do worse.

Korra ran her eyes over the imposing door once they reached the entrance of the mansion. “Well?” she asked. Kuvira sighed apprehensively. She reached forward and pressed the doorbell, bypassing the gigantic and ominous doorknockers.

Eventually, someone opened the door. “Hi,” Kuvira said awkwardly. “Is Opal Beifong staying here?” The stranger, a tall girl around their age with long black hair, looked at Kuvira confusedly and a little guardedly. “I’m Kuvira,” she explained. The confusion transitioned to complete distrust.

“I don’t have to answer that question,” the woman replied matter-of-factly, with the same confidence of someone who’d just spoken to their lawyer. Shit.

“I see,” Kuvira said. She glanced down at the ground. “Can you just tell me if Opal is okay?”

The woman eyed her suspiciously. “She’s fine,” she said. “No thanks to you, of course.” She moved to close the door but Korra’s hand reached out to block it.

“Do you even know who Kuvira is to Opal?” Korra blustered. The stranger, Asami, folded her arms.

“You’re right, I don’t,” she said coldly. “All I know is Opal wanted a place to stay for awhile and that’s all I’m willing to give.” Kuvira bowed her head.

“Alright,” she said. “Will you tell Opal I was looking for her?”

Asami pursed her lips. “She knows,” Asami said. “You’re probably the only person who thinks it’s going to make a difference.” That hurt. Asami frowned and her gaze softened with something like regret. “Leave her alone. She needs time.” Kuvira was at least glad to know that Opal was actually alright.

“Alright, thanks,” Kuvira said, turning around.

“Seriously?” Korra hissed.

“You’re trespassing,” Asami said, seeming to lose her patience with Korra. “If you don’t get off of my property, I’ll be forced to defend myself.”

“Ex _cuse_ me?” Korra exploded. Kuvira grabbed her by the arm, pulling her along. It wasn’t worth it. And the knowledge that Opal was on the estate, or at least had been at some point and was now safe, probably living it up … was all Kuvira really needed. If she deserved anything at all, this was probably it.

Still, when Kuvira turned her head to look back, she could’ve sworn that she saw a woman with short hair in one of the higher windows of the estate, looking down at them. It made Kuvira feel small, like a bug pinned in a display case, and when she took a second glance she couldn’t see anyone so she decided she was imagining things.

<3

“What a jerk!” Korra raged over their beers. They’d turned into a restaurant to grab some food before parting ways, and Korra seemed more disappointed than Kuvira about the events of the evening, who mostly just felt stunned, heavy with the depression of having completed a highly anticipated task.

Korra looked searchingly at Kuvira. “Do you think the two of them are dating?” she asked, concerned. Kuvira felt flattered at Korra’s protectiveness. She shook her head.

When Kuvira had asked Bolin about Sato, he’d known all about her, and gave Kuvira the impression that Asami and Opal had just been friends, and not much closer than classmates. If there was something between them, it would’ve taken months to develop. And, if Opal had wanted a rebound, she’d have gone to Bolin, though that wasn’t Opal’s style anyway. Kuvira still had a chance to … do _something_ , at least for now.

Besides, “Apparently, that woman and Mako are seeing each other,” Kuvira said, at least according to Bolin.

“That’s even worse!” Korra howled, even more offended by Asami Sato’s existence than before. She explained, “He was _this close_ to taking Wu off the market.”

“Are you sure Mako’s into guys? You two dated, and he’s always given me … _aggressively_ heterosexual vibes.” By which Kuvira meant to say that he was very boring.

“I just like to believe he’d be a better boyfriend to boys,” Korra admitted, smirking a little. “And Wu _needs_ to be taken down. That guy is gay but that doesn’t mean I’m okay with him sexually harassing every woman, including me, just to stay closeted!” She took a deep swig of her beer. “What I’m saying is, is that she’s clearly evil.”

“Thanks for being righteously angry on my behalf, I guess,” Kuvira murmured. “But it’s good that Opal has a friend like her.” Kuvira used to be that friend.

“Are you sure?” Korra asked. “Are you really sure about that? Or have you fallen under that prissy beautiful elegant rich girl’s spell, too?”

“Sounds like Mako isn’t the only one who likes her,” Kuvira muttered. It had been a joke, but Korra’s brow furrowed.

“What is _that_ supposed to mean?” she asked sourly. Kuvira couldn’t help but literally laugh out loud.

“Nothing,” she said. “Just that … Asami Sato seems like a nice person, and she’s kind of smoking, so I can’t blame anyone for liking her.” She’d figured that that was why Korra had been so concerned about Sato and Opal possibly dating, but now she wondered if Korra was just concerned about Sato in general.

“Wait, _that’s_ Asami Sato?” Korra said, tone suddenly switching from irritation to awe. Kuvira raised an eyebrow. Korra laughed awkwardly, running her hand through the back of her hair. “I uh … I actually _do_ know her.”

“You rich people are all inbred I swear.”

“It’s called _networking_ ,” Korra said sourly, gripping her beer defensively. “Anyway, there’s _no_ way she and Mako are dating.”

“Yeah?” Kuvira prompted, surprised to find out that this hadn’t been the first time Korra and Asami Sato had crossed paths. “You know something I don’t? She a lesbian?”

“I don’t know,” Korra said, taking a decisive swig. “But Mako’s a mistake you only make once.” So Sato and Mako had dated before.

“ _Inbred_ ,” Kuvira declared. Korra shoved her with enough force to nearly make her fall over in her seat, and Kuvira laughed, clinging to the counter.

“I didn’t recognize her,” Korra said, almost ashamed, a flush creeping up on her cheeks. “But I can see it now. She’s … changed.” Kuvira didn’t know what from, but she believed Korra.

“Sometimes I like to think we all have,” she said. But she really didn’t know.

“Well, if her personality’s the same as it was when she was younger,” Korra offered. “She actually _is_ pretty nice.” Curiosity got the best of Kuvira.

“I heard there was some sort of, tragedy that happened?” she prompted.

Korra shrugged. “Her … mom died. She was super young. She was at our school just a little while before her dad took her out. Probably sent her to Zaofu afterwards, and I guess then started homeschooling her. I didn’t really like her at the time because. You know. Guy drama. But, I remember she was really nice.” Korra looked regretful.

“Wow, and you _yelled_ at her,” Kuvira mused. “Great second impression Korra.”

“Oh shut up,” Korra grumbled, clearly embarrassed. Korra had always been a little too hot-headed. Kuvira could sympathize. “I’m just saying … Opal is probably in good hands.” Of that, Kuvira had no doubt. She could hardly do worse after leaving Kuvira.

<3

Coming back to her apartment, Kuvira found that it was cold. If it wasn’t for the absence of Opal’s phone, laptop, and some of her clothes, Kuvira would’ve said no one had been there since she’d gone. Clearly, Kuvira leaving to go to Zaofu had given Opal some leeway to figure out where she wanted to be. She could’ve changed the locks and kept the place, if she’d wanted.

Kuvira turned on the heat, shrugging her bags onto the floor. Korra had laid out the red carpet for Kuvira to stay with her or another family in Republic City, but the few moments Kuvira had spent at the estate had been cramped. Well, not cramped—Tenzin and Pema’s place was huge, but it had too many people for Kuvira’s taste. Honestly, it reminded Kuvira of the Beifong household and she knew she couldn’t stay. Still, it was nice to have the option.

But, as Kuvira stripped off her coat and tried to settle back into her place, she discovered that she couldn’t. It was funny. She’d lived for years without anyone after leaving Zaofu, and it had never felt like this. It had been liberating, exciting, to live by herself. Now, Kuvira was wondering whether she should take Korra up on her offer after all, at least to distract her from her thoughts, the emptiness of her apartment, and the uncertainty of her future.

<3

It was difficult going back to work. It wore on Kuvira like it never had before. Here she was, just working as a bartender, watching her wage inch up infinitesimally as the years passed, never considering whether she should stay or when she should go. She hadn’t even been gone that long, but Kuvira felt like some sort of new gear had clicked into place, and she didn’t function the way she did before.

It was either Opal leaving, or Kuvira going back to Zaofu and speaking to Huan and Suyin, or the thought of coming back to a cold apartment … something had changed which made the drudgeries of Kuvira’s work that much more wearying, almost unbearable.

“Put it on my tab,” some guy insisted.

“We don’t do tabs for new customers,” Kuvira replied, stony-faced, not having much patience left to lose.

“Listen, I’m good for it, but I’m trying to have a conversation, I’ll be right back,” he said, on the phone, with a girl beneath his arm. “I’m in _all_ the time.” He wasn’t.

“Alright,” Kuvira said. “What is your last name, sir?”

“What?” he said, maybe too drunk to understand, maybe being belligerent.

“I _said,_ sir—” Kuvira started but Hwei grabbed a hold of her shoulder.

“Hi there, can I help you?” she asked, subtly pushing Kuvira off to the side with claw-like fingernails. Kuvira sighed, moving off to another customer, supposing she should be grateful that Hwei had taken this idiot off her hands.

“So,” Hwei said a few minutes later. “What happened to you and your girlfriend?”

“We broke up,” Kuvira said, passing the pink and purple shots over to the waiting hands of some college kid. She barely noticed the way she’d called Opal her girlfriend until she’d said it.

“Oh,” Hwei said, surprised. She glanced around a moment before saying, “I thought you’d taken those days off work to do some kind of. Grand gesture.”

“Yeah, well,” Kuvira said, moving over to the sink to wash out some glasses. “Grand gestures are bullshit.”

“Sorry,” Hwei offered, wincing.

Kuvira was as well, of course, but felt it wasn’t her place to say. “Why,” Kuvira chanced. “Why did you ask?”

“Oh,” Hwei said. “When you came back, you just seemed way more miserable than you were before. And that’s saying something. I figured either things didn’t work out, or that the honeymoon period was super short.” She laughed, and Kuvira found herself unable to cope with it.

“I’m going on my fifteen,” she announced, tossing the towel she’d been using down on the bar.

She turned to leave, but her escape was blocked by Zaheer, sitting by the edge of the bar. Kuvira didn’t look at him, she felt tears in her eyes. “Smoke break,” she choked out. Zaheer inclined his head and let her pass.

She headed out, and sat down on the back steps. Spring was starting now, but the nights were still frigid. She was underdressed for the outdoors, but the discomfort she was in was bracing, distracting. She took in a deep breath and waited patiently for her tears to thin out and evaporate before they could fall. She wished she had cigarettes.

Kuvira took out her phone and swiped to her messages. She looked at Opal’s name glowing in the night. All the texts she’d left Opal that first night, and the silence since. Opal had evidently read them, probably to get rid of the notification, but she hadn’t responded. She’d been texting Bolin, and Kuvira suspected Korra as well. But then, there wasn’t much for Opal to say to Kuvira.

Thinking about it, Kuvira saw that it really hadn’t been Opal whose feelings had suddenly changed. It had been Kuvira. And that had terrified her. And no wonder, when it was so scary just to imagine life without Opal in it. The one person who had loved Kuvira, conditionally but truly, and the one person Kuvira had loved back. And she’d screwed it all up, in a matter of months, in a matter of seconds.

“Hey,” Hwei called out. “Are you hiding out here?”

“Who’s tending the bar?” Kuvira asked, wiping her nose, electing not to answer the question.

“Zaheer was the bartender before he hired me,” Hwei replied. “I think it’s a ‘riding a bike’ situation.”

She sat down next to Kuvira, setting anchor by her side. Either Kuvira would have to move, or she’d have to talk. Stubborn, Kuvira wanted to keep all her thoughts to herself, but Hwei’s presence was calming, almost forgiving. She already knew what a shithead Kuvira was. She deserved an explanation, too.

“I told Opal that … you and I were dating again. That we were moving in together,” Kuvira spoke up into the night, after the silence stretched for a moment too long. She didn’t want Hwei to get the wrong idea but she didn’t want to lie anymore either.

“Wow. That’s really embarrassing for you,” Hwei said, after taking a brief pause to digest what Kuvira had said, almost sounding impressed.

“Yeah,” Kuvira agreed. She didn’t know what else to say.

“Unfortunately for you, I have a girlfriend now,” Hwei spoke up, almost conversationally.

“Oh?” Kuvira asked, glad to hear it. Hwei had been dating people on and off, but it hadn’t been anything serious, and from the way Hwei said it made it sound different.

“Yeah,” Hwei said, tugging her shirtsleeves further down her arms. “New relationship but uh. I may be U-hauling a little.”

“Yeah?” Kuvira asked.

“It’s different,” Hwei decided. “When you’re on the same wavelength as someone else. I don’t know.” Kuvira could feel something in her chest tug.

“So, are we gonna meet this girl?” Kuvira asked.

“Oh, uh, she’s closeted,” Hwei explained. “She’s an actress.”

“There’s only twelve lesbians in this city,” Kuvira murmured to herself, idly guessing who it could be.

“Huh?” Hwei asked.

“Nothing,” Kuvira said quickly.

“Anyway, we’re still together,” Hwei went on. “Monogamously. I uh … brought up my whole … thing about seeing multiple people, and while she wasn’t seeing anyone seriously because, again, closeted, she was cool to just. Try with me. Which, I know, super regressive of me to ask but … yeah.”

“No,” Kuvira said, feeling something uncomfortable flex in her chest, something guilt. “No, you’re allowed to want that. It’s not … it’s not inherently wrong to want. Monogamy. You’re not selfish or … or controlling for wanting that. It’s just … wrong for some people. Like me.”

Hwei bobbed her head, like she didn’t know what to say, or didn’t feel comfortable enough to speak. When she did speak, her voice was a little muted, choked. “Thanks.”

“Yeah,” Kuvira said. “Sorry if I ever made you feel like you were selfish for wanting that.” Even if sometimes Kuvira had felt like it, resentful and scared.

“No, it’s fine,” Hwei said.

“My first girlfriend,” Kuvira offered, “or, well, my first two relationships were pretty unhealthy. So, relationships just kind of scared me. Still do.” She shook her head. “I really am sorry, it’s no excuse.”

“It’s not,” Hwei agreed. “But it _is_ an explanation. And I know it can’t be easy to talk about. So … thanks. But also, even without all that,” Hwei went on, seeming to decide on something. “You still have the right to not want monogamy.”

“I,” Kuvira said, dumbly. “Thanks.” 

“You’re welcome,” Hwei said. She laughed shortly. “Feel validated?”

“Big time,” Kuvira admitted. It was almost like … talking about things with other people … was good. “Maybe I should talk to someone … professional.”

“Oh yeah, for sure,” Hwei enthused. “Your issues alone are enough to like, reinvigorate the economy.” She smiled. “So, what are you going to do about this girl you’re in love with?”

“Well, I insulted her, threw her feelings back in her face, and now she doesn’t want to speak to me,” Kuvira said. “So your guess is as good as mine.”

“Wow, so you _are_ in love with her,” Hwei murmured.

Kuvira glanced over at Hwei, who didn’t seem hurt as much as she seemed mystified. “I don’t,” Kuvira said. “I don’t even know what that is.”

To her surprise, Hwei didn’t argue. Love was probably a tough topic for her as well, tough for everyone. You end up in a relationship with someone, statistically speaking, one of you was bound to have enough issues about love to traumatize the other one over it. Perhaps Kuvira was arrogant, but she estimated that she’d probably messed up at least three people over love, not including herself.

Kuvira considered things, sitting beside Hwei in the cold night. Whenever asked, Kuvira had called herself polyamorous, but had seen the contradiction in her words, in the sense that she was terrified of falling in love. She was perfectly capable of being deeply attracted to multiple people, to balance a relationship with all of them, and she liked that. She liked knowing people that way, and it undoubtedly made her feel freer to enjoy relationships when she was in more than one, so as to not feel owned by one person.

But she’d also kept herself so sequestered away from the people she was supposed to be with. People who hadn’t deserved it. Opal had been the closest thing to an exception, but that was no surprise given that they lived together and had started off as friends. And while Kuvira had seen some women who didn’t seem to mind, Korra who was more of a friend than a lover, Zhu Li who was strictly only interested in sex, and really kinky sexy at that, there were enough women who clearly were not happy with being held at arm’s length, Ginger and Hwei.

Then there was Opal, who was kind, and funny, and never put up with Kuvira’s shit. Who knew Kuvira’s past and didn’t look at her with disgust. But it was Opal, who was so tied to that past as well. Kuvira couldn’t imagine a future where she could give Opal what she would want. While things seemed forgiven among the Beifongs, Kuvira couldn’t trust that she could manage a real future with any of them, beyond a polite friendship. Kuvira wanted Opal back, wanted to make amends, but there was a part of her that still wanted Opal. And she didn’t know if she could balance what she wanted with what she couldn’t handle.

“Ready to go back in there?” Hwei spoke up, her breath blowing out like smoke in the night air, rubbing her arms. “It’s kind of cold out.”

“No,” Kuvira admitted, the honesty of it dawning on her. “I kind of wanna quit.” She really didn’t want to be a bartender anymore. She kind of wanted to do anything but that. Going back to Zaofu again, she could see just how much she’d been avoiding trying to forget that place. Now, she felt like she could do anything. “But I don’t know what else to do,” she admitted.

“Well,” Hwei said. “Can’t say it’d pay much, but if you want, we have practice four nights a week and summer tryouts coming up.” She was inviting Kuvira to join her troupe. Still. After all these years.

“Thanks, Hwei,” Kuvira said softly. “You don’t have to.”

“What can I say, I’m just perfect,” Hwei said. “Besides,” she sighed. “It’s not entirely altruistic. I’ve seen your videos. I know you can dance.”

“Not well enough to actually have a career from it,” Kuvira argued. Not anymore, at least. Maybe if she’d stayed in Zaofu, but she’d long since shot that chance.

“Well, it’s not like you have to do this for the rest of your life,” Hwei said. “But it might be something nice to do for now. While you’re waiting for that girl to speak to you again.”

“Yeah,” Kuvira said quietly, feeling something warm like a sunrise well up in her chest. “It might be.”


	21. Chapter 21

Korra invited Kuvira out for drinks one evening. Kuvira was off work, off practice, and she wasn’t sure if this was a date or not. She over thought it when she was getting ready, pulling her hair down, wearing eyeliner, but the way Korra comfortably sat down next to her at the bar, legs swinging out, knees knocking against Kuvira’s with disregard, didn’t make Kuvira feel entirely seduced.

She didn’t know if she _wanted_ it to be a date or not, and the line for her and Korra had always been rather thin. Still, they hadn’t kissed in months, much less had sex, and Kuvira didn’t really know what that made them. If it was something Kuvira wanted to change or not.

“So, how are things?” Korra asked her.

Kuvira shrugged. Spring was well on its way now, the trees in Republic City lighting up with flowers, the dry air of winter turning wet with rain. Kuvira had been busy, between work and dancing. She hadn’t quit the Red Lotus, but her time had become more limited with dance practice, and P’Li had had to hire on more staff.

Kuvira had gotten the spot on Hwei’s troupe, though there’d never been much doubt in Kuvira’s mind that she would. Kuvira made a good dancer. She had the body for it, and she’d been dancing ever since she got it in her head that it was something she could do. It wasn’t entirely down to Suyin, dance was about as natural to Kuvira as walking. Zaofu had one of the most renowned dance schools in the world, and Kuvira had planned on attending after graduation but that plan had fallen to the wayside many years ago.

But what that all meant was that when she started dancing again it came back easily, all the bundles of muscles and neural connections that had remained dormant for years suddenly coming back to life, eager for movement. Even the annoying parts of dance, the brutally boring, difficult exercises that had nothing to do with dance itself, not directly, were things she found herself enjoying. It was satisfying to feel pain that promised growth, improvement, for a change.

And the people on Hwei’s troupe were nice. Maybe it was just because they were older than the people Kuvira used to dance with, but they were more mature, less … ‘competitive’ wasn’t the right word, because there was still some element of competition, but they didn’t seem like the type of people that would knock Kuvira down so they could stand taller. In turn, Kuvira did the same.

“I’ve been keeping myself busy,” Kuvira said, looking down at her beer, cold and weeping onto the counter they were sitting at.

“Good,” Korra enthused, almost nervous. It had been nearly two months since Kuvira had last seen Opal and Kuvira hadn’t had a lot of time or energy to seek out Korra in the interim, either. Which, in itself was strange, since for as long as Kuvira had known Korra, Korra had been busy with sports, school, and being a young diplomat, and that had never stopped her from making time for Kuvira.

“You?” Kuvira asked.

“Well,” Korra said slowly, regretfully, playing nervously with the ends of her hair. “The real reason why I came here … I met someone.” That made sense.

“Oh?” Kuvira asked. It must have been the season, but it seemed like everyone was meeting people now, Kuvira aside. Kuvira had received a text from Ginger a few weeks ago telling her she was off the market, now it seemed like Korra was too. Kuvira swallowed her disappointment. It wasn’t difficult.

“Yeah,” Korra said breathlessly. “And I—I think I might like her, like _really_ like her, so I wanted to let you know. That I’m going to ask her out.”

“Sure,” Kuvira said, not really sure why Korra was bothering to tell her. She never had before.

Korra seemed surprised when she caught on that Kuvira wasn’t upset. “Wait, you’re okay with this?”

“Yeah I’m okay,” Kuvira said, taking a drink of her beer. “We aren’t exclusive, Korra. That’s what polyamory is all about. And, besides … I’m kind of … stuck on my ex-foster sibling in case you haven’t noticed.” Kuvira laughed shortly.

“You guys do _not_ act like siblings if it makes you feel any better,” Korra said, wrinkling her nose.

“I know,” Kuvira said, rubbing her hands together nervously. “But it was just … always one bullet point on the list of why I shouldn’t like her that way.” Not that it mattered now. “Anyway. You and this new girl. You getting serious?”

“Maybe,” Korra said.

“It’s Sato, isn’t it?” Kuvira surmised.

“I didn’t recognize her at first!” Korra declared, flushing. “She wears so much makeup now.” She rushed to add, “Not that there’s anything wrong with that.”

“You think she’s okay with you seeing other people?” Kuvira asked, because while Kuvira hadn’t been certain if this was a date or not, she liked Korra a lot. Not in the same way or with the same history and magnitude as Opal, but Korra was helplessly fun, a terrific friend, and someone who both understood Kuvira and made her feel like she didn’t need to take herself so seriously.

“I think so,” Korra admitted, revealing a daring side to Miss Sato. “But either way I’m … kind of hoping for something more serious with her.”

“Like a primary or something?” Kuvira prompted. Korra actually blushed.

“Or something.”

“Damn,” Kuvira whistled. “This _is_ serious.”

“It’s not like I was seeing anyone other than you,” Korra said quietly, and Kuvira finally realized why Korra had never told her about the people Korra dated, never anything more than joking digs at her ex.

“Really?” Kuvira asked, mouth suddenly running dry.

“I just never told you because I didn’t want you to get all weird about it,” Korra shrugged. Kuvira sat up, surprise transitioning to offense.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Korra scoffed. “Kuvira you _yelled_ at your closest childhood friend just because you thought thing were getting too serious between you two,” she reminded Kuvira. “You’re kind of terrified of commitment.”

“But you didn’t,” Kuvira tried, swallowing carefully, “ _want_ to commit to me. Right?”

“You’re still doing it!” Korra called out, almost laughing, though she mostly just looked pitying. “ _No_ Kuvira,” Korra said, settling back. “I never wanted us to be more than what we were, but you think two people dating each other is a prison, and even when I just wanted to have fun with you I had to navigate around that because I _knew_ you’d never believe me!”

“You lied,” Kuvira realized.

“No,” Korra said firmly. “You never asked, and you just assumed I was like you.”

“Like _me_?” Kuvira echoed, hackles rising. “What does _that_ mean?”

“Whatever, if you want to get mad at me or defensive, _fine_ ,” Korra snapped, eyes cold with anger and irritation.

“Korra!” Kuvira called out, because Korra was honestly grabbing her bag and preparing to leave. “Just give me a minute to process okay? I’m still working on my shit!” Korra of all people should know that Kuvira was still a major work in progress.

Korra’s offended expression cracked into laughter. “Okay,” she said, smiling a little, relaxing slightly. She leaned back in her seat, getting comfortable again. “I’m glad to hear you’re working on your shit.”

“Yeah,” Kuvira muttered, rubbing her hands across her face. “Sorry. Honestly, I should have noticed.” She felt regretful. “That you weren’t polyamorous. You never talked about anybody else.”

“Well, neither did you, not really,” Korra said. That had always been about privacy, in addition to the fact that Kuvira didn’t spend a lot of her time on dates thinking about people that weren’t with her, Opal playing an obvious exception to that rule. “Honestly it didn’t make a difference to me.”

“So,” Kuvira spoke up awkwardly, feeling embarrassed but like she’d made a fool of herself around friends, not enemies or strangers, so not too embarrassed after all. “You and Sato?”

“If it goes well,” Korra said. “She, uh … taught me to drive stick.”

“Oh you’re _in_ ,” Kuvira declared.

“It was _very_ sexy,” Korra sighed. “Anyway. Enough about me. How are you doing? _Really_?”

Kuvira wracked her brain, not expecting the repeated question. Truthfully, she was doing … not _well_ , but much better than since Korra had last seen her. Working a little less, dancing a little more. And she hadn’t really talked to Korra about any of that. “I uh, have a recital next Thursday,” Kuvira offered.

“A recital?” Korra echoed. “What are we reciting?”

“It’s a dance recital,” Kuvira mumbled.

“Oh, you’re dancing again?” Korra sat up in her seat, grinning.

“It’s not a big deal,” Kuvira grumbled.

“No, that’s fantastic,” Korra grinned. “Is this an invitation?”

“Fuck off,” Kuvira grumbled.

“I’ll come,” Korra promised her, leaning over to nudge Kuvira with her shoulder. “I might bring some friends, too.”

“Please don’t,” Kuvira mumbled, embarrassment already flushing hot on her neck and cheeks.

“Oh, come on, the more moral support the better, hey?” Korra teased.

“I don’t need it.”

“For sure,” Korra said agreeably. “I remember when I went back home last summer we went snowboarding and, not gonna lie, I was kind of afraid I’d be rusty but. Nah. Still got it, after all these years. You’ll do great!”

“You’re,” Kuvira started, unable to stop herself from feeling suspicious. There was just something about the way Korra had reacted that felt off. “How did you know I used to be a dancer?” She and Korra had never talked about it. It wasn’t something Kuvira really talked about, not until now.

“Oh,” Korra said, seeming to realize what Kuvira meant. “Well. It’s just something … _Opal_ mentioned. How you used to dance, and how you quit when you left Zaofu.”

“Oh,” Kuvira echoed. Yeah, Opal had always been bugging Kuvira to get back into dance.

“She’d probably appreciate knowing,” Korra offered. “About the recital. About you dancing again.”

“Why?” Kuvira snorted, feeling out of depth.

“I mean obviously she still cares about you,” Korra said. And Kuvira wanted to be nasty. The impulse was there, to deny that Opal cared because if she did she wouldn’t have left. But that was childish, and untrue. Opal had left _because_ she cared, perhaps too much. From that perspective it was unfair for Kuvira to even consider poking her way back into Opal’s life just to injure her some more.

“I wouldn’t want her to feel … obligated to care,” Kuvira said, shoving her beer aside, stomach suddenly feeling too sensitive for drink.

“I doubt she would,” Korra pointed out. “Feel obligated to, I mean.” But she didn’t know Opal like Kuvira did. She didn’t understand what had happened between them, not really.

“I don’t want her to feel like the only reason I’m doing this is because of her,” Kuvira said, folding her arms on the counter, hunching over. “Like I’m improving myself to make her happy. Or, like it was her idea.”

“Then why are you doing it?” Korra asked.

Kuvira leaned forward. Because … she definitely would not have been doing this if it wasn’t for Opal. “Being with Opal, even just for that short time, made me …” Kuvira started. “It made me realize that … I’d been avoiding a lot of things that made me happy, because I was afraid of becoming associated with things that made me unhappy.”

“Like dancing,” Korra said.

“Like being close to someone,” Kuvira mumbled. “I was so afraid of getting hurt again … or I guess … even feeling really happy.” She sighed. “And I don’t have to be. I don’t have to … live my life totally afraid and insecure.”

“If it’s any consolation,” Korra offered. “You don’t … _seem_ afraid or insecure.” Kuvira laughed at that. Korra had no idea. “I mean,” Korra amended. “You don’t give off that vibe.” Korra had become pretty acquainted with Kuvira’s insecurities after all.

“Well, thanks, I try,” Kuvira said. “Anyway … I was dreading letting Opal live with me because I knew that would put me in proximity with the Beifongs. But it was _Opal_ , and I couldn’t say no.”

“You could have,” Korra argued, and Kuvira could almost hear Opal’s voice behind Korra’s words.

“Well, I didn’t _want_ to,” Kuvira replied. “And you know, I was right, in the end. Because of Opal, I saw Bataar, I saw Suyin. I had to go back to Zaofu, walk past all those guards. It was awful. Humiliating.” Korra had been there, she’d seen that, seen how red Kuvira’s eyes and face had been after her conversation with Suyin, the tear stains on Suyin’s dress.

“I’m sure she didn’t want you to go through that,” Korra started in defending Opal.

“And I survived it,” Kuvira concluded. She glanced away. “I lived.” She ran her fingers across the condensation building on her drink, cool and pleasant. “And I’m thinking maybe … maybe I should start living for real. Through the shitty stuff and the good stuff, too.”

Korra was quiet. “Then why not let Opal know about it?” Kuvira opened her mouth, but found that she really didn’t know what to say. “Sounds like … maybe you’re not … totally over everything that you just said.”

“Okay,” Kuvira said. “Probably not.” Korra raised an eyebrow. “Alright, definitely not.” If she was going to be honest, she really felt like … she didn’t deserve to subject Opal to her, after all she’d done. “But still, I don’t want to … manipulate her into … being back in my life. Or make her feel like I’m trying to manipulate her, or like my well-being is tied to her.”

Kuvira frowned, the grip she’d fastened on her beer becoming almost painfully tense, and she let go. She let out a breath. “I’m done playing people.” It felt like the truth, and Kuvira hoped it was.

“Sounds like you want to earn her back,” Korra said.

“Kind of, but I can’t,” Kuvira said, feeling frustrated, not with Korra, but herself. “Ugh. Anyway. Can’t you just … congratulate me on my dance recital without psychoanalyzing me?”

Korra sighed, a little long-suffering smile on her lips. “I can try,” she said. She grinned crookedly at Kuvira. “Congrats.”

Kuvira let out a sigh in response, feeling a sympathetic smile cross her lips as well. She took a sip of her beer. “Thanks.”

<3

Kuvira looked at herself in the mirror. Flushed and exerted. Hair coming out of her braid in little black wisps. Her eyes shone with excitement. Sweat had cooled and dried matte on her face many minutes ago, but still she sat here, almost grinning at herself in the mirror. The recital had been … an amazing success.

Whatever nervousness Kuvira had felt leading up to the recital had been converted to useful energy, and she hadn’t even been that nervous. She’d been excited, and even the nerves had been familiar, enjoyable in their own way. And on stage, everything had come together. No one had made a single misstep, much less Kuvira, and Kuvira knew … she knew she had to do something about this. Maybe not go back to school, but _something_. She couldn’t be a bartender for the rest of her life.

Kuvira hung around after most people had given their hugs and goodbyes, almost reluctant to leave the space, the electric energy of success still hanging in the air. She stayed behind after every one had gone, eying herself in the changing room mirror, grinning like an idiot, high on adrenaline and dopamine. She was warm in and out and every muscle in her body ached with satisfaction. Even her lungs felt wonderful, well-used, when she breathed.

“Could I come in?” a high-pitched voice rang out behind the sound of knocking on the changing room door. It was enough to snap Kuvira out of her thoughts. Kuvira gave herself one last look over before heading towards the door of the changing room.

“Did you forget something, Hwei?” Kuvira asked, striding over to open the door. She was shocked to see who was behind it.

It was Opal, knuckles still raised in the air to knock. Opal stepped back, almost as though she was equally as surprised.

“Hi,” Kuvira said stupidly, trying to understand what Opal was doing here.

“Hi,” Opal said right back.

Kuvira was just dressed in her undershirt and leggings, and embarrassment was burning up her neck to think about how sweaty she was.

“Could I … come in?” Opal asked again, softer, more nervous. Kuvira’s body stepped back without any order from her brain, making space for Opal in the changing room.

Kuvira didn’t know what she was supposed to think. Opal was here, dressed in a yellow rain jacket and jeans, wearing bright green boots. Spring had been her season, Kuvira had always thought, and she was beautiful right now in a way that hurt to look at. Kuvira hadn’t expected to see her at all. She’d wanted to, someday, but she’d never thought it would be so soon, so suddenly and unexpectedly.

“Sorry for barging in on you,” Opal said uselessly, like she could hear Kuvira’s racing thoughts. “I was … waiting for you outside, then I thought … maybe … it doesn’t matter.” Kuvira hadn’t been leaving, and Opal, waiting in the rain, had wanted to take matters into her own hands. Kuvira’s jaw clenched so tightly that her teeth started to hurt.

Kuvira kept her eyes on the dresser, packing up her makeup and things, jerkily opening up her bag to shove inside the things she should’ve put away ages ago. She could see Opal’s body standing awkwardly, in the mirror, in Kuvira’s peripheral. The jacket was new.

“I thought you said you were never going to leave me,” Kuvira suddenly said in her need to break the silence. She glared at the Opal in the mirror, at her hands, twisted fretfully together.

And Kuvira hadn’t meant to sound accusatory or guilt-trippy, but she did. And she hadn’t meant to say that either, so vulnerable-sounding and injured, but she realized that that’s all she had really been thinking, all these months. But, Kuvira didn’t feel up to fucking around anymore, or pretending that she was nicer than she was, either. So she let the words hang without comment or apology.

“I didn’t,” Opal sighed, and something jumped so high in Kuvira’s chest that she forgot all else. “I just need time away.”

“Yeah,” Kuvira choked out, regretting bringing her words immensely. “I understand.” She zipped up her makeup bag and tossed it into her purse.

And then, because she couldn’t control herself having Opal in front of her again, tangible and real, Kuvira turned around to look at Opal again and asked, “Do you still need time?” She was pathetic.

Opal blinked, like she was surprised at the question, at the intensity with which Kuvira was clearly wounded. And Kuvira wished she could take an aside to scold herself, get herself under control again, because she didn’t want to sound as needy as she was. She didn’t want her neediness to influence Opal either way.

“I don’t know,” Opal shrugged, posture shifting into something more guarded.

Kuvira really wanted to ask Opal why she was here. Obviously, Opal had come here because of Kuvira, somehow, but seeing Opal retract just as easily, like just speaking to Kuvira was enough to make her reconsider, made Kuvira’s skin crawl.

“Well, you got a good look, didn’t you?” Kuvira barked, roughly pulling on her jacket, zipping it fast enough to catch on her braid briefly, painfully tugging at her scalp. “You can go right back to Sato’s place.” She had every intention of not sounding bitter, but she knew she wasn’t succeeding.

“Do you think that was easy for me?” Opal asked. “Do you think I enjoyed this?” She sounded angry, and when Kuvira finally met her eyes she could see that Opal _was_ angry, she was furious and indignant and had stepped closer into Kuvira’s space. “Did you think you were the only person that was hurting?”

Kuvira looked away. Clearly, she hadn’t, but faced with the enormity of Opal’s anger and sadness, and hell Kuvira could recognize it when she saw it—grief—was forcing her to be more contrite. But Kuvira, perhaps irrationally, was also angry. Angry that Opal had left. Angry that Opal had the audacity to come back when Kuvira was perhaps at her most vulnerable.

Suddenly then, the door just behind Opal which had been left slightly ajar was bust open with a foot and three giggling women fell inside. Kuvira’s troupemates. “Kuvira, when are you coming to celebrate?” Hwei asked, grinning, her arm looped around her friend, June’s, shoulder.

Opal looked between the two of them, cinching her raincoat tighter around her shoulders. Kuvira glanced down, unable to look at either Opal or Hwei. “You go on ahead,” Kuvira said.

Hwei raised an eyebrow at Opal and Kuvira. “You sure?” Then she seemed to recognize Opal and her back straightened out, June also standing taller like she was a puppet whose strings had been pulled taught. Mari, next to them, laughed at something on her phone, acting like she was already well into celebrating.

“See you later, Hwei,” Kuvira managed. She noticed Opal’s face tense almost imperceptibly, realizing or perhaps remembering who Hwei was.

“See you later,” Hwei said, glancing between Opal and Kuvira and giving Kuvira one last sympathetic expression before grabbing the purses she’d no doubt forgotten and moving on with the revelry.

“Hwei,” Opal said softly once Kuvira’s troupemates were down the hall, laughter echoing but muffled. “Like … _that_ Hwei?” She didn’t sound judgemental, or accusatory, but she obviously needed confirmation.

“She’s dating Ginger,” Kuvira dismissed. “On the down low.”

“Wow,” Opal mused to herself. “There’s like twelve lesbians in this city.” Kuvira almost laughed. Almost. The look in Opal’s eyes softened. Kuvira looked down at her hands and sighed.

“Can we go somewhere to talk?” she asked. Opal nodded. They left together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> owo the thick plottens...


	22. Chapter 22

“So,” Kuvira said, feeling standoffish again outside in the cold air. Her sweat was sticking her face and cooling tacky. She felt gross next to Opal and it had started to rain harder. “How did you … find out about the dance recital?”

Opal, always prepared, unfolded her umbrella and held it above their heads as they wandered aimlessly in the evening. “Korra told me,” she said simply.

 _Fuck_. Kuvira was going to _murder Korra in her sleep._ Violently. Imaginatively. The Republic City police force was going to think they had a new serial killer on their hands but Kuvira was just going to kill Korra in a fun unique way, ditch town, change her name, and become a farmer in the Fire Nation somewhere.

“Don’t be mad at her,” Opal said, probably catching the look on Kuvira’s face. “ _I_ asked her how you were doing. I always have.”

Kuvira felt like her head was spinning. Obviously, Korra and Opal had remained friends. And Kuvira would’ve been fine with it, but she felt blindsided by the knowledge. _Fuck_ , they’d probably never stopped having brunch.

“You Beifongs have no fucking sense of boundaries,” Kuvira choked out finally, voice sounding unsteady to her own ears.

“For what it’s worth, if we were just friends I’d still ask,” Opal said. That was a bullshit argument, if they were still friends Kuvira would have told her.

“If you wanted to know, you could’ve just texted me,” Kuvira pointed out. “ _I_ still had my phone.”

“Well, I guess I’m not perfect,” Opal said coldly, arms constricting slightly as though she wanted to cross them, though all it did was bring the umbrella closer to Kuvira’s head, almost getting the spokes tangled in her hair. Kuvira ducked her way out of the umbrella and Opal raised it higher above their heads, looking regretful.

“If it makes you feel better, I didn’t watch your recital,” she offered. “I was planning to but I … stood outside until it was over. I bought a ticket but … I don’t know. I didn’t want to see you and Hwei but … I _did_ want to congratulate you. I know it’s been years since you’ve danced publicly. I’m sure you did great …” Kuvira had been flawless.

“I didn’t do this for you, you know,” Kuvira bit out. She’d done this because of Opal, in many ways, but Opal didn’t need to know that, and even if Korra had blabbed about other things she probably hadn’t told Opal that. Opal blinked, bemused.

“I know,” she said simply. Kuvira glanced down at the street as they walked, because she felt like if she didn’t pay attention she’d trip and fall somehow.

“Why,” Kuvira murmured, “Why do you think I started dancing again?”

“Well,” Opal said, flushing. “I hope it’s because you … wanted to. And I know … Hwei is your girlfriend, so why wouldn’t you dance?” That made Kuvira pause, but Opal went on, “Not to mention that … maybe finally … cutting off ties with every Beifong you felt comfortable enough to do it again.” Opal’s face contorted in discontent, shame. “That’s kind of why I couldn’t bring myself to watch you once I thought about it.”

It was apparent that Korra clearly hadn’t said too much because almost everything Opal was saying could’ve been cleared up by Korra alone. “Hwei and I aren’t dating anymore,” Kuvira reminded Opal. And how could she say that Opal being with her was what had given her courage to dance again, not Opal’s absence?

“But you’re happy, right?” Opal asked, her lips set in a tense frown.

“Fuck …” Kuvira couldn’t help cursing, feeling disappointment and grief well up in her throat. “How could you leave me and then ask me if I’m happy?”

“Kuvira, I _had_ to leave,” Opal said. “I was really hurt. I know I don’t … I’m not _obligated_ to your love but I just … _wanted_ it. At least an acknowledgment of it. And I know I said some mean things, things that weren’t fair. I could have … I _should_ have handed it more maturely, but I was just hurting and lashed out then left.” That was Kuvira’s line.

“I mean, you _were_ right,” Kuvira admitted, desperation clawing inside her chest. Finally having the opportunity to give Opal the apology she’d been meaning to all this time, she tried, but the words came out jumbled. “It’s why I pursued Hwei, and lied that we were getting together. Why I cut you off when you were trying to tell me how you felt.”

She took a breath. “I _was_ scared. Scared of what—what this relationship meant. Means.” She felt foolish for feeling brave, but it was the first time Kuvira had ever really admitted out loud that what she and Opal had was something other than friendship, something more.

“I still am,” Kuvira admitted, shutting her eyes, feeling something like a headache come on.

Opal was silent until Kuvira looked at her. Her eyes were wide and clear, her mouth hanging open slightly in surprise. “So, what does that mean?” she asked, wonder in her eyes. And she was right to wonder.

“I can’t …” Kuvira said, voice breaking. “I’m not normal, Opal. I can’t do this.” Opal was silent for a moment. Kuvira wanted to kneel on the ground in the fear of the adrenaline and emotions being strong enough to knock her to her knees. “I missed you. I miss you.”

“I miss you, too,” Opal said, stepping forward, almost like she wasn’t in control of her movements. “And I … I came to say that I will always be here for you. How ever you want me. For how ever long you want me. If you do.”

“I do,” Kuvira admitted, unable to meet Opal’s eyes. “Want you.”

“Oh,” Opal said, and to Kuvira’s horror she sounded surprised. Like she’d never considered that Kuvira might actually want her. Kuvira looked at Opal, hair wet in the rain, skin damp, eyes confused, and she wanted her. In her yellow jacket and clunky rain boots, she wanted her.

“But what does this mean? For Hwei? The apartment?” Opal stumbled. “Even if I … what _do_ you want? Do you want me to move back in and … us to go back to being strictly platonic? Because I don’t think that can fix anything.” She glanced away, looking guilty and uncertain, shoving some of her hair behind her ear. “And I … I don’t know if I can.”

“Opal, you know I was lying about Hwei, right?” Kuvira asked, catching on Opal’s words, because while there was a lot to unpack about what Opal wanted, about what Kuvira wanted, about what either of them could offer, they couldn’t talk about any of it with Opal still believing Kuvira’s lie.

“But you just said,” Opal started, blinking like she was disoriented. “You _just_ said you pursued her.”

“And I did,” Kuvira admitted. “But we weren’t going to move in together. But, I flirted with her when you and I were …” Kuvira took a breath. Honesty, _honesty_. She drew the words out as painfully and painstakingly as thread through a stitch. “I almost kissed you one night. And it terrified me.” Opal looked surprised.

“I flirted with her,” Kuvira pressed on. “But she called me out and we were never … when you and I were fighting, I felt put on the spot and I lied, but Hwei and I never were …” Kuvira shook her head, wishing her words would come out clearer. But they were all bottlenecking in her throat, all the things she needed to tell Opal but never had.

“You almost kissed me?” Opal asked, eyes growing wider. “You _wanted_ to? _When_?” And Kuvira didn’t know why she hadn’t noticed Opal falling in love with her, or being in love with her, because it was all there, as tentative as Opal was.

Kuvira felt her skin flush. “When didn’t I?” she muttered, more to herself than Opal. Because sure, there had been that one night, but it wasn’t that her desire had never been there, burning beneath the surface, just that she’d needed was the proximity. A match was always a match, you just needed to strike it. Opal gaped at Kuvira.

“Anyway, you were right, Opal. I was just afraid. And I don’t know that I’m any less afraid. And I don’t … know how to do this. I don’t want us … I don’t want to hurt you again, or myself,” Kuvira went on, because try as she might she was still a coward. “But I just don’t know …”

“Neither do I,” Opal breathed out, interrupting. “But … you’re the first person I’ve ever felt like this about because I was so, _so_ happy with you, even when you were seeing other women and refusing to kiss me, or even touch me.”

The thought was almost shocking. Kuvira had thought Opal had been happy, or at least content, with whatever their relationship was because she didn’t care about it. Now Opal was telling her that she’d been happy because she had cared that much about Kuvira that she’d settle for a relationship dynamic she didn’t like.

Opal wrapped one arm around her front to squeeze her shoulder, looking small and self-conscious. “But I don’t think I can handle that anymore because I’m—I’m selfish, and I’m jealous, and seeing you with other women while I’d just have to be your friend would really …” she raised her eyes to meet Kuvira’s, sadness tinting their shine “… hurt.”

“I …” Kuvira burst out, hands aching to touch Opal, to smooth her hair or hold her cheeks, wipe the tears she thought she could see beading at the corners of her eyes. “I just want you back, Opal. I miss you so much.”

“I miss you too,” Opal said again, voice barely above a whisper. “I’m just saying that I know if I go back, if we move in together and we … I’m going to want something more, and I’ll probably pressure you into giving it to me.”

“I don’t—” Kuvira began. She cleared her throat. Opal clearly felt like she’d been pushing her feelings onto Kuvira, and Kuvira hadn’t done much to dissuade that idea, especially when they’d been fighting. “I don’t … I _liked_ what we had. I just … it _wasn’t_ just you.” Somehow, Opal understood.

Her eyes could be so intense, almost sharp to look at, so Kuvira looked away, cheeks burning. She knew they couldn’t go back to just being casual friends. They would always be wrapped up in each other’s lives this way. And there was this new part of Kuvira that wanted that, wanted that as much as she wanted Opal’s mouth, scent, nights. A part of her that wanted to believe that she could have it all.

“Every time anyone gets close to me, I run,” Kuvira said. “I feel trapped. I feel like I’m going to hurt them, or hurt myself, because I don’t know how to do this. I don’t know how to … but I _care_ about you Opal. And if you need … if it’d be easier for you to stay away from me then … then I understand.”

“What do you want from me, Kuvira?” Opal asked, voice cutting through shame burning on Kuvira’s cheek and neck, making Kuvira look up again. It had started to rain in earnest, and Opal’s hair was matting down a little on her forehead, rain beading on her nose. Her gaze was unflinching.

“I want …” Kuvira started. “I want to try. To be with you.”

“Okay,” Opal said softly. “That’s fair.”

“I don’t know how,” Kuvira said, stepping closer, unable to look away from Opal now. “I just … I don’t want to hurt you again Opal. Or myself, but I know … _hurt_ so well. I don’t know that I know how to do anything else.” They were still kind of talking around each other. Opal took in a slow breath, and somehow understood.

“We’ll try,” she said. Kuvira’s knees nearly buckled from shock.

“We will?” she asked.

Opal stepped closer, reaching out and Kuvira took one of her hands in her own. Opal pulled her into a hug and Kuvira felt overwhelming emotion grip her like she was a child in an ocean, trying to resist the waves.

“I missed you so much,” Kuvira squeezed out. “You don’t even know.” Even now, Kuvira was discovering the depths of her loss, now that Opal was here again.

“I probably have a good idea,” Opal admitted. Her hand was on Kuvira’s cheek, and then her lips were on Kuvira’s. Soft but sure, Opal kissed Kuvira chastely but her free hand moved down to Kuvira’s waist pulled her closer.

“Was that alright?” Opal asked shyly when she parted, giving Kuvira some space to consider it. It was so brief, that Kuvira had only managed to get a quick impression of the way Opal would taste, of the scent of her shampoo, different now that she was staying with Sato, but something familiar about it all.

“You were right,” Kuvira said breathlessly. “You didn’t need help practicing kissing.” Opal smiled patiently at Kuvira’s attempt at a distraction.

“I’m glad you feel like that,” she said, getting somehow closer to Kuvira, nudging her forehead with her own. “But I might need some more pointers.” Kuvira recognized the invitation for what it was, and leaned down to kiss Opal more firmly.

She reached up to wrap her arms around Opal, and Opal was dragged closer, the arm holding the umbrella above their heads trapped between them until Opal just let it fall, grabbing onto Kuvira in turn. Still just a solid press of lips, until Opal moved to catch Kuvira’s mouth with hers. Kuvira clutched tighter, almost dizzy with this.

Kuvira couldn’t believe she’d kissed someone she loved and not utterly destroyed them. She was kissing Opal, and it meant something, and it didn’t make her feel sick. It didn’t make her feel like she was taking advantage, or being taken advantage of, it was just Opal’s sweet lips on hers, her tongue, the softness of her hair and skin. Kuvira coiled around Opal, kissing her deeply, trying to ignore her trembling hands.

Kuvira had never felt like this before. So terrified. So utterly peaceful. Not when she was sixteen and utterly desperate for her Suyin’s love in every meaning of love that she knew, not when she was seventeen and convincing herself of the lie that she’d be safe, not when she was eighteen being touched by her first girlfriend.

She could feel it all falling off, all the grit and oil that her soul had been drowning in for years. But she’d been so worried that if she’d ever found someone like that, someone to love, all her sick would have to be carried by them, that her loving them would be their undoing and that she would use them the way she’d been used.

But it wasn’t true. She knew by the way Opal breathed, by the way her hands held onto Kuvira’s arms, by the way her eyelashes fluttered against Kuvira’s cheeks. This wasn’t something dark and sick. It was good, and it made Kuvira happy and not in a way that would drive her to despair if it was gone tomorrow. She couldn’t, when she’d been given this. Happiness that came at no one’s expense. It existed and she was holding it in her arms. She could live without it, she knew she could, without breaking apart, but she didn’t want to. She didn’t have to.

“Kuvira—” Opal broke off. Kuvira kissed her cheek gently, still needing the contact. “Are you—” Opal sighed, lips swollen. “Are you alright?” Kuvira opened her mouth to answer, only for a sob to come out.

Opal ran her hand down the back of Kuvira’s arm and Kuvira tried to speak again, but then she just began to cry. Opal wrapped her arms around Kuvira, pulling her in close. Kuvira bit her lip, trying to keep her tears but they fell all the same. Opal held her tightly, but when Kuvira leaned down to kiss Opal again but Opal stopped her with her hand, glancing around them. Some old couple passing them by was giving them a dirty look, and Opal reached down to take her hand, making Kuvira forget.

“Let’s go home,” she smiled, wiping away a tear on Kuvira’s cheek before picking up their umbrella and tugging Kuvira along.


	23. Chapter 23

Inside her, _their_ , cold apartment, Kuvira felt both chastened and grateful to see Opal. Opal tugged off and hung up her yellow jacket onto a hook, as natural as anything. They’d probably have to go to Sato’s and pick up the rest of Opal’s things tomorrow. Everything else, Opal’s toothbrush, bed, many of her clothes, were still here. If Opal wanted to stay, of course. Kuvira was still second-guessing that.

“Hey,” Opal said softly, walking back over to Kuvira. “What’s up?”

“Nothing. Just,” Kuvira muttered gruffly, “Thank you … for coming back.”

“I was always going to come back,” Opal said fiercely, reaching out to squeeze Kuvira’s hand between hers. “You are always going to be a part of my life. No matter what.” And Kuvira believed her. Even if they hadn’t made amends tonight, it was clear Opal was prepared to be Kuvira’s friend, at the very least.

Friendship, Kuvira was realizing, was possibly a safer bet to shoot for if she wanted longevity in her relationships since she had more experience being a friend than a girlfriend, though she’d never been good at either. But … Opal didn’t want to ignore the other things they felt about each other, the other things they’d done and wanted to do, and neither did Kuvira.

“I’m sorry I pushed you away,” Kuvira admitted, pulling Opal closer to her, not quite holding or hugging her, but Kuvira was still a little cold and it was just nice to have Opal near. Maybe Opal would leave tomorrow, maybe things wouldn’t work out, but Kuvira’s was too tired to keep walling herself off.

“It probably needed to happen,” Opal said diplomatically. And that was a nice way of looking at it. A nice way of looking at all the horrible shit Kuvira had put herself through, put others through. Because they were all still standing, still moving on, even Kuvira. It didn’t need to happen, but maybe it was alright that it had.

“Now,” Opal said, smiling, satisfied. She reached up to tuck some of Kuvira’s loose hair behind her ear. “A very important question. What do we have in the house to eat?” Kuvira laughed and tipped her forehead to rest at the crook of Opal’s neck.

“There’s some veggies,” she said. “I’ve been living on stir-fries.” Which was generous to say, seeing as how often Kuvira miserably ordered out, but dance required at least a modicum of self-care so Kuvira had been cooking at least a few nights a week. Opal’s smile broadened.

“I’ll start chopping vegetables, then.”

Opal didn’t need directions, she still remembered where everything was, bring out a pan for stir-fry, a cutting board. It made sense, it hadn’t been that long since their fight, no matter how things felt, but it was almost fascinating to watch. Opal once again demonstrating how seamlessly she fit into Kuvira’s life, the point where it seemed almost like she’d never left, like she’d always been there somehow.

Kuvira busied herself turning on the heater and the lights in the kitchen, then watched Opal rummage around in the fridge. Opal had gained some weight with distance. Kuvira, on the other hand, had probably lost some due to lack of interest in taking care of herself outside of dance, which probably hadn’t helped matters either. But all the same, Opal looked beautiful, it just stood as a reminder of the time apart, that Opal had changed while Kuvira hadn’t been watching. Her hair had gotten a little longer too, choppy at the ends.

Opal noticed Kuvira looking and smirked, wicked. “Are you going to help, or what?”

It took Kuvira a moment to remember herself. “Didn’t want to interrupt your method, Chef Beifong,” she replied.

“Interrupt away,” Opal enthused. Then, she spoke more hesitantly. “Also … I heard you went back to Zaofu. How was Chef?” Kuvira stepped closer, sighing as she did.

“He was good,” she offered. “Everyone was … fine.” She knew Suyin was going to be the inevitable next topic. “Could we … talk about it tomorrow?” She was totally drained from the day. Opal nodded, the kindness in her eyes warming Kuvira like a fire.

“Chop the broccoli?” She passed Kuvira a head. Kuvira got to work.

The truth was, while Kuvira knew she was still attracted to other people, and no doubt always would be, the feeling of claustrophobia pushing her out was slowly dissipating. As for Kuvira’s concern about bottoming, about letting Opal touch her and enjoying it, was probably something she wanted more than Opal did. And they’d have time to figure that out. Opal could be pretty patient when she had to be.

“So,” Opal spoke up thoughtfully, after they’d eaten dinner and were cleaning up after themselves. “What are we going to do?”

Kuvira froze, midway through washing one dish, uncertain of what to say. Dinner had been a light affair, carefully navigating around topics that required more than minimal energy. Kuvira hadn’t asked Opal yet about how life with Sato had been, and other than that brief discussion about Zaofu Opal hadn’t asked Kuvira any hard questions either.

“I mean,” Opal spoke up responding to Kuvira’s silence, shoulders folding in a little. “We don’t have to make any decisions now, I just thought, before we did anything else …”

“You’re right,” Kuvira assured her, reaching out to put her hand on Opal’s shoulder, clasping it in a way she hoped was comforting. She felt gratified when Opal relaxed. “What do you want?” Kuvira asked softly.

“I want whatever you want,” Opal said back, just as softly.

“Opal, come on,” Kuvira insisted. “No judgements.” Because Kuvira really didn’t know what she wanted, what she could handle. But she wanted Opal, at least, to be happy.

“I want us to date,” Opal mumbled, like it was silly to suggest. Then she raised her head up to look at Kuvira directly, almost beseeching, “We can always break up later if we don’t like it, if it doesn’t work. No one else has to know. Well, maybe Korra. I feel like she already does.”

Opal really wanted to date Kuvira … after all that had happened, after Kuvira had done her best to demonstrate who ill-suited she was for relationships. Perhaps Opal had gotten it into her head that since Kuvira had apparently settled down with Hwei she was capable of it, but Kuvira had told her the truth and Opal knew better now.

“It wouldn’t be terrible, right?” Opal pressed. “You like me, right?”

Kuvira shook her head, almost feeling dizzy. “That’s an understatement,” she gritted out at last. Opal’s mouth cracked into a smile, and she stepped closer to Kuvira.

“This isn’t a marriage proposal, we don’t have to tell anyone about it,” she said. “This isn’t about my mom. This isn’t about my family. And sure, this might get awkward for my brother someday, but I don’t care about any of that.” If she wasn’t so certain, she would almost sound shy. “I care about you. So, I’m here, if you’ll have me.” Kuvira gaped at her and Opal wavered slightly, eyes shining bright and terrified.

“Oh, come on,” Kuvira muttered, voice thick, pulling Opal into her arms and hugging her tightly. She felt Opal laugh against her ribcage, exhilarated.

“Is that a yes?” she asked, turning her face to grin into Kuvira’s neck.

“I don’t know,” Kuvira said. “Is it a good idea?”

“Potentially the best,” Opal said. “I don’t know if you noticed but I’m nearly always right.”

“Yeah,” Kuvira murmured. “Opal … I don’t … I don’t know if I can give you, what you want, what you deserve, in a partner.”

“I don’t know about who deserves what, but I want _you_ ,” Opal replied.

“You have bad taste,” Kuvira laughed wetly. Between Bolin and Kuvira, Kuvira did not think highly of Opal’s taste in partners and, even then, she had to concede that Bolin would’ve been the better choice, though not by much. She admitted, “I just don’t want to fuck this up.”

“Is that,” Opal asked, a little hesitantly. “Is that enough to keep from trying?”

“No,” Kuvira decided, reaching out to card her hand through Opal’s soft, slightly damp hair again. Not anymore.

Opal smiled, leaning her cheek into Kuvira’s hand. “So, what do you want?” she asked, voice buzzing against Kuvira’s palm.

“I don’t know yet,” Kuvira said. “You. But I don’t know how that looks like.”

“Well, you don’t have to,” Opal said. “As long as I’m there, I’m happy.” She seemed to be.

“I mean,” Kuvira said, feeling a little frustrated and frazzled, because she was on a roll and wanted to get it all out while she could. She had to clarify, “I don’t know if I can bottom. Or be monogamous.” The words came out crass, clunky, but they were the truth, and Opal needed to know them before she got in even deeper.

“I’m not asking you to,” Opal reminded her, voice patient and clear.

“Yeah, but,” Kuvira muttered. “You _want_ me to.” Not to mention that Kuvira was the first woman Opal had been with, and now given how invested they were, possibly the last unless Kuvira chased her away eventually. Opal deserved to have everything she wanted in a partner, even if Kuvira couldn’t be the one to give it to her. The thought was terrifying.

“Whoa, Kuvira,” Opal murmured, hands reaching up to clasp Kuvira’s cheeks, shaking her from her panic. “No way. I don’t. I want you and I want whatever makes _you_ happy and comfortable.”

“This is a circular conversation,” Kuvira noted, relaxing somewhat beneath Opal’s steady gaze.

“We don’t need to figure it out tonight,” Opal said firmly. “I just want to date you. And you said yes. That’s already a big thing. For both of us.” Kuvira nodded, taking in a breath.

“Do you, did you want to watch something?” Kuvira suggested, nervous in a way that felt out of place given that this was her apartment. Well, it was their apartment, and Kuvira very badly wanted it to remain that way, which did a lot to explain how nervous she was being.

“Sure,” Opal said, eyes crinkling at the corners, kind, like she was humouring Kuvira, and like she wanted much more. “Whatever you want.”

<3

The gentle, warm, rise and fall of someone’s breath. The rhythm of someone’s heart beneath Kuvira’s cheek. The smell of stir-fry, and something sweet, intoxicating. Opal. Kuvira opened her eyes, and blearily took stock. She was laying on the couch, resting on Opal’s chest.

“We were watching TV for ten minutes, then you fell asleep,” Opal noted, amusement warm in her voice, her words buzzing in her chest.

“Sorry,” Kuvira mumbled, still feeling dozy and confused. She never typically fell asleep in front of people, not even women she was sleeping with, though she never really spent the night to begin with. Even with her first girlfriend, Kuvira had had difficulties being comfortable enough to fall sleep, though that probably had more to do with Izumi than Kuvira.

“Don’t be,” Opal said, reaching over to smooth her hand over Kuvira’s hair. “You had a long day.” That was true. Kuvira sighed, leaning back into her previous position against Opal’s firm and soft chest, Opal’s cotton shirt stretching warm against Kuvira’s cheek, and Opal adjusted to meet her.

She could feel Opal’s breath on her forehead, warm and tentative. Kuvira shut her eyes, just focusing on Opal’s breathing, the rise and fall of her chest and shoulders, the warmth against Kuvira’s forehead and cheeks. Then, steadily, Opal leaned forward, brushing her lips against Kuvira, pressing them to her forehead in a chaste kiss.

Kuvira’s breath hesitated in her lungs, and she pushed it out, almost overwhelmed by how vulnerable and loved she felt. This really was what she’d been pushing away, Opal’s gentleness and easy affection. Kuvira’s drowsiness was rapidly being replaced by focus on Opal, on the rise and fall of her lungs, of her sweet scent, and soft, chapped lips.

Opal kissed her forehead again, like Kuvira was a child, like she thought the world of her. Kuvira reached over and gripped Opal’s slender wrist in her hand, running her thumb along the joint, hoping it could convey what she suspected she couldn’t say out loud. That she wanted Opal to continue.

“Can I kiss you?” Opal asked at last, voice unbearably gentle. Kuvira answered by tilting her head up to press her lips to Opal’s.

Opal sighed, leaning in, reaching over to run her hand across Kuvira’s arm, sending shivers up Kuvira’s back, through her ribs. With Opal’s mouth just slightly open, Kuvira couldn’t help but deepen the kiss, running her tongue along the seam and almost shuddered to hear Opal’s quiet moan, muffled into Kuvira’s mouth.

Kuvira’s breath hitched in her lungs, desire sparking deep in her chest, as they kissed. Every time Kuvira bet, Opal raised, there was something hungry in the way they kissed now. And the small noises Opal let out whenever Kuvira bit her lip, or licked into her mouth were addictive. Kuvira could already feel herself getting wet, and she didn’t know if she wanted to fuck Opal tonight, if that was a good idea, but she wanted and wanted.

Opal broke off then. “We should probably,” she said, lips still so helplessly close to Kuvira, shining swollen and wet in the dim light of their apartment.

“Opal,” Kuvira uttered, and her voice sounded humiliatingly wrecked.

“I swear I’m not … just here for the good sex,” Opal mumbled, sounding just as desperate.

Kuvira laughed a little, because it was hilariously misplaced. “I know,” she said, reaching up to tuck Opal’s hair behind her ear. She didn’t understand why Opal loved her, but she believed Opal did.

And Opal’s mouth was too close, like bait Kuvira was helplessly drawn to. She leaned in close, not kissing, but she let their lips touch, opening her mouth and inhaling Opal, nearly feeling drunk. And she could hear Opal whimper in the dark, just from being that close. Kuvira, wet and almost pounding with what she wanted, understood. She took one hand and found Opal’s hip. Opal sighed.

“Are you sure?” she asked, but her tone betrayed her eagerness.

“If you are,” Kuvira said, lightly massaging Opal’s thigh with her thumb. Opal took in a breath through her teeth, hissing.

“It might be smarter to wait till tomorrow,” she said, her hands reaching up to tangle in Kuvira’s hair.

“Sure,” Kuvira agreed, the tingling sensation Opal’s fingers caused almost making her shiver.

“Then again,” Opal sighed, and Kuvira could see her pupils were blown wide. “Why put off the inevitable?”

“Good point,” Kuvira agreed again, nudging her thumb closer to the inside of Opal’s thigh.

“God,” Opal mumbled. “We need to _talk_.”

“Tomorrow, whenever you want,” Kuvira promised, voice so quiet it came out almost as a whisper. Because they would. Kuvira was too tired to keep talking tonight, picking at her wounds, but she’d be able to tomorrow, and every day after, for as long as she had to. But one thing was true, she’d never be tired of Opal. “Let me do this tonight.”

Opal kissed Kuvira sweetly, swinging a leg over Kuvira’s so that she was settled perfectly in her lap. Kuvira took the opportunity to sweep her hands beneath Opal’s shirt, undoing her bra. Getting the picture, Opal swiftly threw off her shirt, and Kuvira took a moment to appreciate the sight of her bare skin in the dim light before taking one of Opal’s nipples into her mouth the way Kuvira knew she liked.

“Wow,” Opal hissed, rocking her hips back uselessly onto Kuvira’s leg. “Did we never do this on the couch before?”

“We tried once,” Kuvira reminded her, voice still rough from sleep. “That was the time we were on the floor.” Opal let out a grumble of frustration, thrusting herself backwards onto nothing.

Kuvira’s hands found the band of Opal’s pants and Opal shifted her hips so that Kuvira could drag her pants down to her thighs. Kuvira let go of Opal’s clothes as quickly as she could, finding Opal’s skin, her thighs, her ass, clutching her. Opal shivered, shifted closer.

“Can I,” Kuvira started.

“Please.”

Kuvira let go of one of Opal’s hips, trailing down between Opal’s legs, hot to the touch. Opal sighed as Kuvira slid a finger into her, quickly added another, flexing her fingers there. “I missed you,” Opal mumbled. Kuvira raised an eyebrow, still sleepy, not sure if she should feel cheap.

“Missed this?” she asked.

Opal ground her hips against Kuvira’s waiting hand. “Of course I missed this,” Opal mumbled into the space where Kuvira’s neck and shoulder met, her breasts brushing against Kuvira’s collarbone. “I missed you holding me. Missed you being this close.” Kuvira bit her lip, curling her fingers just so inside Opal and Opal let out a moan that sounded more like a whine. She’d missed this, too.

This wasn’t just sex, Kuvira knew. If somehow the magic fizzled out, or if either of them got less horny with age, or whatever, Kuvira knew it wouldn’t change what they had. But, the sex was really good. Kuvira jerked her hand deeper into Opal, setting up a solid rhythm, reaching down below with her left hand to find and circle Opal’s clit.

“I wish we could do this forever,” Opal mumbled into Kuvira’s neck, more nonsense than logic, hips jumping when Kuvira touched her. But Kuvira understood, felt it too, thrumming in her thighs and core as she heard her hand move between Opal’s legs, fingers sliding in and out of Opal, Opal’s breath almost on her back because of how wrapped around Kuvira she was.

Kuvira leaned down, circling Opal’s nipple with her tongue, taking it into her mouth and sucking gently. The angle was awkward for Kuvira, but Opal tasted good, sweet, and she threw her head back, jerking Kuvira closer to her with her arms, twitching and probably coming. Kuvira kept touching her, feeling Opal cling to her as she moved against her. Opal was smooth and clean in her mouth, and this close her scent surrounded Kuvira. Painfully intense, it felt like coming home. Kuvira couldn’t help but reach between her legs with her free hand.

“Seriously?” Opal actually snorted, cheeks flushed, no doubt feeling Kuvira’s arm flex as it moved to tug down her leggings.

“Opal, do you even know how you look like? How you sound?” Kuvira muttered, touching herself faster, mouth opening in a gasp as Opal ground down on her palm harder. “Now’s not the time to be humble.”

Opal leaned in close, kissing Kuvira’s neck, tugging Kuvira’s hair back for leverage. Kuvira couldn’t help it, she moaned out loud. It felt good, and it felt good to be tugged around like that, and Opal’s mouth on Kuvira’s throat felt even better. Opal’s teeth scraped lightly against Kuvira’s neck as she found the perfect spot.

She pushed Kuvira down onto the couch, laying her flat as she rode Kuvira’s fingers. Kuvira normally didn’t get a lot of satisfaction touching herself from this angle, but she was so aroused it didn’t matter much. She was lucky that Opal took the initiative, gripping Kuvira’s hand between her legs, guiding it, rising and falling on her fingers, because Kuvira’s focus was out the window.

She was lost to the quiet sounds coming from Opal’s body, the pants of her breath, the way her voice would catch in her throat, saying nothing but raising subtly in intensity. Much of her face was cast in shadow, in dark, but Kuvira felt as though she could see her perfectly clearly.

The curve of Opal’s shoulders, her bare chest and stomach as she moved on Kuvira. Opal’s face, both lax and tense with pleasure, her hair curling around her cheeks. She’d always been beautiful, but she’d never been Kuvira’s, not like this. Opal leaned closer again, and Kuvira wished she had a free hand to feel the flex of Opal’s stomach as she drove herself against Kuvira, but then Opal was kissing her.

Deeply, slowly, despite the pace of Opal’s hips, hot and wet where Kuvira was touching her, nearly running down Kuvira’s fingers as she moved. Her mouth was just as warm, and Kuvira had kissed many people but she’d never been kissed like this, Opal’s hands winding their way through Kuvira’s hair, ghosting over a breast, branding a palm to Kuvira’s rib.

Kuvira moaned with abandon into Opal’s lips, and cruelly Opal pulled away, playfully dropping a chaste kiss onto Kuvira’s wet lips, hanging wide open, desperate, but Kuvira was helpless to change the situation. Then Opal sunk down and was kissing Kuvira’s neck again. Kuvira moaned out loud, and she could feel Opal’s smirk.

Kuvira felt feverish, as she touched herself, touched Opal, and Opal touched the both of them—one hand playing with one of her breasts, the other reaching over to tease one of Kuvira’s nipples and it turned out Kuvira wasn’t that unaffected by it after all. Swearing, Kuvira’s head snapped upwards, and Opal’s teeth found the tender meat between Kuvira’s neck and shoulder, biting softly, and Kuvira couldn’t stop herself from coming hard.

“Opal,” she choked out, thrusting her fingers deep into herself, to wring out that last bit of pleasure, thighs and clit almost burning with want, bliss, and exertion, and she rode it as Opal rode her, possibly coming a second time.

They sat there, clinging to each other, breathing in the warm wet air they’d made together for what could’ve been minutes as Kuvira tried to piece her brain back together. “That was okay, right?” Opal asked after a few moments of stunned silence, queen of understatements.

“Thank you for coming back,” was all Kuvira could think to say, feeling hot and flushed, gingerly withdrawing her hands from her and Opal. She could hear Opal smile across from her.

“I love you,” Opal reminded her, words coming out with a sigh. She reached down to hold Kuvira’s wet fingers in hers. Kuvira felt herself blushing, somehow, after all of this.

“Same,” Kuvira said quickly, hoping her earnestness could carry her over how hard it still was to say those words. Opal beamed all the same. “Thank you,” Kuvira added, again, feeling both unworthy and worthy at once.

Then, for some levity, Kuvira declared, “I’m going to rub this in Bolin’s face,” wrapping her arms around Opal and hugging her, dragging Opal to lay flat on the couch with her, sinking, comfortably crushed beneath Opal’s weight.

“He _just_ got dumped by Ginger like a month ago, lay off him, okay?” Opal asked, but there was laughter in her voice, clear fondness. Kuvira grinned into her shoulder, pressing a kiss there. She would. For now.

“We should probably brush our teeth,” Opal mumbled sleepily, moving around until she was sandwiched comfortably between Kuvira and the backrest of the couch.

“Tomorrow,” Kuvira declared. “And we’ll … talk.” Maybe Kuvira was too tired, but it didn’t sound as intimidating as it would have three, four, twelve months ago. Opal nodded into Kuvira’s hair, and pressed another kiss there, before curling up around Kuvira and dozing off like Kuvira knew she would. And Kuvira knew she wouldn’t be that far behind. She was still exhausted, and she hadn’t felt this calm in years.

She knew this wasn’t going to be easy, or nice, and she didn’t know how it was going to end. Tomorrow they’d have to talk, about everything. Kuvira suspected that she’d have to talk about a lot more than she wanted to, not because Opal needed to know, but Kuvira needed to tell someone, needed to tell her. It was still going to suck, Kuvira knew. But, right now, tonight, as she breathed in one deep breath beneath and beside Opal, things felt simple.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all! Before I say anything else, I have to say a few words.  
> Black lives matter, non-black people from all over the world must stand in solidarity with and support of Black people in the States and in their own communities. If you enjoyed this fic and have some money or time to spare, please check out some of the donation links below!!  
> \- if you’re like me and have trouble figuring out where to donate because there are so many causes, consider donating to multiple bail funds at once ([ https://secure.actblue.com/donate/bailfunds](https://secure.actblue.com/donate/ab_mn?refcode=tweet))  
> \- or to multiple anti-racist organizations at once (<https://secure.actblue.com/donate/ab_mn?refcode=tweet>)  
> \- or to Canadian (like me) organizations (<https://www.cheminst.ca/about/cic-statement-on-anti-black-racism/>) (or look up organizations in your own country)  
> \- if you have a friend you suspect is going through a hard time right now, consider e-transferring some money for a meal  
> \- if you can’t donate, consider signing a petition or watching a video which will donate its ad proceeds, and make sure to educate yourself on anti-racism (<https://www.cnet.com/news/how-to-help-black-lives-matter-protesters-even-if-you-cant-attend-in-person/>). Don’t feel guilty for not being able to donate, because everyone can help right now. This shit can’t keep happening, the world needs to change, and we need to be that change. Any help is help.  
> If you’re in a situation right now where you’re protesting, I’m proud of you and I’m not the praying type but if I was I’d pray for safety on all of you right now.
> 
>   
> Now, onto the final messages.  
> I can’t believe it, over 70k words later and here’s the silly modern AU I’ve been plucking at for years DONE!!! Thanks for all the kudos and comments along the way!! Just a couple of things to send off this fic …  
> I hadn’t intended to end the story with a sex scene because I try not to make sex scenes seem like they’re the goal of the story. At the very least, I did want to make it clear that the goal wasn’t that Opal touch/penetrate/go down on Kuvira. She probably will some day, because it’s something Kuvira wants and is really going to try to work towards, but she also may not. Different people have different boundaries around sex :) and the point of those boundaries is not to wear them down until they don’t exist. Obviously, Kuvira’s boundaries are born from like … unhealthy relationships, but there’s nothing wrong with someone for having boundaries so I hope I gave that impression :33. Furthermore, Kuvira’s probably gonna carry on being polyamorous, nothin’ wrong with that either <3\. Maybe Kuvira and Korra will go on some double dates every now and then eheh ;) (I’m not going to write that, but feel free to let your imagination roam wild).  
> I don’t know when I’ll write anymore Opal/Kuvira fic, obviously I have a few ideas but I can’t force myself to write. Still, if you carry on following me here on AO3 or kuvopal.tumblr.com, I’ll let you guys know.  
> Thank you for all the kudos, bookmarks, and comments especially. Whenever you leave a comment on a fic, it really does encourage the author a lot, so while authors may not reply or may not reply every time (me, guilty!!) don’t think that your comments don’t mean a lot because they really do. The engagement I had while making this fic was really appreciated as I went through my various real-life pains. Hopefully it was enjoyable for you as well :) Stay safe and kind everyone, here’s to the years ahead, and as always feel free to leave your thoughts below :) In fact, please let me know what you thought! And if you did help out with any of the causes above, let me know too :). Let's do good things for one another.


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